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Goodbye Jesus

Ex Born Again... Born Ok The First Time!


Guest susan

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Hi Guys

My name is Susan, I live in Glasgow Scotland.

I am a 46 year old Mum of 3 beautiful children.

My kids are all grown up now and I have 3

adorable grandchildren

 

 

1976:- This is where my nightmare began!

 

When I was 17 years old, I was relatively care free and didn't think much

about God. I was dating my then boyfriend, since I was 16. I used to

go to visit my older sister often who was into 'contacting the spirits'?

It was just a bit of fun...or so I thought! Strange things did happen,

but I never took it seriously. At that time there was, a group of

Born Again Christians in the area where I lived. I'd never heard

anything about them before, although I knew them as old neighbours.

I didn't know that they were part of the group until one day I was

approached by one of them.

I was asked, "what I thought of God?" Etc. To which I replied, "I didn't

know but told them that I was contacting the spirit world". Well!...

Shock, horror! I was told that it was very dangerous and that I was really

contacting 'Satan' himself and that I was being deluded into thinking

that it was one of my family. They told me I'd better stay clear of all

that stuff. They invited me to one of their house meetings. I admit, what

they said did frighten me, but, did I believe in God??

I thought about it and went along anyway I just thought it was going to be

your everyday kind of church, singing hymns and reading phrases out of

the bible... 'God loves you' and all that!

 

Well! Oh yes, I was told "God loves me"... and the rest!

I'd never heard the bible preached like that before! It scared the living

daylights out of me. I thought I was going to die that night and go to

(The Furnace of Fire for ever, there men will weep and gnash their

teeth: Matt 13;42) (For the gate is narrow and the way is hard that leads

to life and those who find it are few: Matt 7;14)!

So that started... my sleepless nights... stress and tension and my strive

for perfection! (Which I could never achieve). I was now aware that

God was watching me! "I was evil and wicked", even tho' "I thought",

I was a nice person. I was kind and caring, I respected my parents..

But, "I was born a sinner" even if I hadn't committed any crime/sin,

"I/we were all in Adam when he sinned".

 

"Other people were dangerous influences" (If the world hates you,

know that it has hated me before it hated you: John 15;18)

"Satan was working on me... I had to get right with God"?

"Time was running out".. The Lord could come back at any time

and I was not ready"! (Therefore you also must be ready, for

the son of man is coming at an hour you do not expect: Matt 24;44).

 

Now I had to think every moment of the day...

Think... Think... Think... and Think again! The "FEAR,

NIGHT SWEATS, STRESS AND ANXIETY... were too much

to bear! I wanted God to "Save me", I needed God to "Save me".

I tried and tried and tried. I told God I would give up my old life

for him... I would love him more than my family.. I would stop

sinning (if I could)! I prayed every moment of the day...

until I could pray no more. Tired and exhausted and terrified...

I would eventually fall asleep, not knowing if I would wake up

again? This went on for the next 25 years.. I can barely believe

it myself! I don't know how I got through life... but I do really...

FEAR!

 

If you would like to read the rest of my story, It is on my web site:-

Here is a link:- http://www.geocities.com/susancasey261/fun_d_mental.html

I'm not sure how much I can post on here. And it is rather long!

 

This is a great support network. Well done to the webmaster!

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Welcome Susan,

 

And they say that to be "born again" will make you at peace? Peace smeesh, no peace until you leave religion that is!

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Susan,

 

Welcome to Here. Good place to land, use on.ass, on.line time :)

 

FundaMENTALists put all the mental and remove most of the fun outa life..

 

I think you'll find *kin* here at ExC who in part share many of the problems and frustrations you've written of.

 

kevinL

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Thanks Guys for the welcome!

It's great to be amongst "like minded" people.

I'm looking forward to reading through as many posts as I can!

:woohoo:

I can relate to so many posts here.

 

Yet in my Wee Home Country (Scotland) there is not one support group in existence. I always felt so isolated here. It would be great to have a one to one with someone, but this is the next best thing for me!

I know I could start a support group... but don't know if I have the energy for that yet... (Still suffer from anxiety and depression) But one day I would like to! I will! I will! (Be more positive) eh!

 

Thanks again guys and peace be with you all!

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Hi Guys

My name is Susan, I live in Glasgow Scotland.

I am a 46 year old Mum of 3 beautiful children.

My kids are all grown up now and I have 3

adorable grandchildren

1976:- This is where my nightmare began!

 

 

 

Welcom Susan, it is good to have you here. Although, it is an online community, I am sure you will find a lot of support. There are many thoughtful ex-christians here, with good insights into fundy religion and how it affects human life.

 

Once again, welcome.

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  • 3 weeks later...
Guest Davej77nc

Please refer back to the Rules Section about content of posts.

 

I have edited this, and will issue a "Strike One Warning", keep sectarian commentary out of this section please.

 

kevinL

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Rawr! Taht'll teach 'em! And welcome to our club Susan

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  • Admin

Thanks Kevin.

 

I changed the permissions. Now "Apologists" cannot post in the "Testimonies" section.

 

Welcome to the site Susan.

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Hi, Susan! I am your age, married and raising two young daughters in East Tennessee.

 

It's great having a Scot here. I am a fan of all things Scottish, especially your beer, whiskey, music, and literature. Nothing like a little Battlefield Band or Dougie McLain on the stereo, a McEwan's Scotch ale on the chair arm, and an open book of Burns or Stevenson.

 

Enjoy the site, and perhaps I'll see you around.

 

-Rob

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Wow. I am so glad to hear you got out of the cult known as Christianity. You are definitely welcome here.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Thanks Kevin.

 

I changed the permissions. Now "Apologists" cannot post in the "Testimonies" section.

 

Welcome to the site Susan.

 

Thanks all you guys for the welcome... Sorry I've taken so long to answer!

 

Yes it is such a relief to be away from all that "Indoctrination". I sometimes cannot beleive that I was with them for so long! Phew!

 

Hi Ro-bear, Glad you are a fan of Scotland... I'm not so far from the home of the Battlefield band, they are good, eh!

I'm not a drinker and do not like our very own whiskey... But my Dad was a lover of the stuff from time to time.

nice to have met you - so-to-speak.

 

 

 

 

 

Susan

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