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Goodbye Jesus

Christian "social Life"


LukeExChristian

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i just turned 20 years old. i was brainwashed before i could reason or think critically. when i broke free, i had this anger towards christianity that lasted for about a year. it still lingers. growing up, i was taught to "not stray from the flock." i didnt get out of the house by choice during my teen years because i refused to so much as be affiliated with those who weren't "saved." it was heavily drilled into me to not worry about girls. my emotions are for ME to control, by highschool, i had nailed bottling up and suffocating any feeligs i had. i stayed at home playing video games when i wasnt at church or school. i played video games A LOT. i had no desire to drive, have a girl friend, or to have friends at all. i did not care about my reputation or my health on earth because when i died i knew i was going to play left 4 dead and halo with jesus for the rest of eternity. all i ever looked forward to, the only reason i enjoyed being alive, was for when i got to come home in the evenings and logon to xbox live. i struggled with putting god before video games my whole christian life.

 

it was a shock to my world when i discovered that a girl was interested in me. which led to discovering that i could have friends i actually cared about. which, long story short, led to my deconversion years later. this first happened during my senior year... i discovered being a teen right when it was all ending.

 

now that i am not a christian... i now do not have that same thrill from getting killstreaks in call of duty anymore. i would like to get out and meet girls, and make friends. but not at church. i want to go to bars and clubs. but i do not want to face my family's disappointment in me. (they dont know i do not believe in god anymore)

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You are so lucky to wake up at such an early age.  You have your whole life in front of you.  Have fun.  These are your glory years.  I wouldn't worry too much about your family.  You can put in the bare minimum effort to pass as a cultural Christian if you wish.  That could go one for years.

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What I would give to have my early 20s back!!!

 

Congrats on making friends, getting a girl to like you, getting out of the house, and figuring this stuff out so early on. It will be tough with your parents for awhile but if they are good parents they should get over it.. If not, you'll find a good support network somehow.

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You are also at an age where your brain is in the midst of its final and most complex stage of development, so it's no wonder that the things that you found exciting even a year ago don't do it for you anymore. (And your brain- and self-development may have been stunted in some ways by limiting yourself so long to video games, which train the brain in certain good activities, but not in many other complex ones.) Now you have an opportunity not just to get out and meet other people, but to grow and get to know yourself, too. You're right at the beginning, literally and figuratively, and I wouldn't be surprised if, within six months, you have more interests and hobbies than you know what to do with. 

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It gets better when you can buy beer for yourself.

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It gets better when you can buy beer for yourself.

i dont plan on drinking, i dont right now at least. i already act stupid enough with out beer

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It gets better when you can buy beer for yourself.

i dont plan on drinking, i dont right now at least. i already act stupid enough with out beer

 

Probably a wise choice.

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On the other hand, I wrote about a third of my PhD thesis while under the influence of alcohol. So who knows? It may make you smarter...

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Congratulations on getting free Luke EX!! You just take your time because the whole world is going to look different to you and at first, we can run around like chicken's with our heads cut off!! When I became free from the god in the sky watching my every move, I didn't know what to do with myself. It's scary and exciting all at the same time!! Stay here and post with us awhile and maybe you'll get some good direction from the members on the board!! They sure guided me in the last 3 years!!

 

Good to have you aboard!!

 

*hug*

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On the other hand, I wrote about a third of my PhD thesis while under the influence of alcohol. So who knows? It may make you smarter...

Some of my most brilliant work has been done while drunk.

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at the time of this post, i am going to a night club with a coworker tomorrow. i know disappointment is evident if they find out. but i decided that i dont care anymore. and i'll tell them just that if they do try to give me shit for it. god was a pivot point by which i was raised. (living in the bible belt). and if i have to, i'll spill the beans that i do not believe he is real anymore. i'd rather live in my car than worship an omnipotent got who created me with free will, lets me think he does not exist, and then sends me to hell knowing where that was where i was going.

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at the time of this post, i am going to a night club with a coworker tomorrow. i know disappointment is evident if they find out. but i decided that i dont care anymore. and i'll tell them just that if they do try to give me shit for it. god was a pivot point by which i was raised. (living in the bible belt). and if i have to, i'll spill the beans that i do not believe he is real anymore. i'd rather live in my car than worship an omnipotent got who created me with free will, lets me think he does not exist, and then sends me to hell knowing where that was where i was going.

 

Kind of hard having parents who are super religious. If you tell them or not, the choice is yours. it's not really their business anyways if you want to go to a club or if you don't believe in the same myths as they do. It's normal for people around your age to want to try out new things, question what their family believes, and be a bit reckless. I would encourage you to look for new interests and try new things. Find out just what it is you like, have fun, and ignore any close minded individual who tries to point you back to verses. You have your own brain to think with, you don't need to use theirs.

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