RealityCheck

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RealityCheck last won the day on July 17 2016

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About RealityCheck

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  • Birthday 03/31/1984

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    Nope.

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  1. What's causing the rise of GIRLIE MEN?

    A change in my behavior leaning towards the "bad boy" end of the spectrum has worked wonders. Oh well, after so many years you stop giving a crap. Thank FSM I'm in my 30s and past that raw emotional phase. All our basic impulses are driven by evolution and no amount of social conditioning is going to change that.
  2. What's causing the rise of GIRLIE MEN?

    The kindness thing has never worked for me. I've stood up for women in the past, I've put myself in physical danger for female friends (our alt right friends here would call it white knighting), I've been there for countless hours while they were going through hell. I've also done everything in my power to help them succeed. Yet in the end, each and every one of them has walked all over me for one reason or the other, or they simply become bored and move on to the next person. I'm not stating this to be pitied, I'm just saying that I learned my lesson the hard way. I didn't really get any respect from the opposite sex until I started approaching everything with a semi-apathetic attitude. I refuse to tolerate any crap. I am not a completely heartless bastard but after a point, I will cut a woman off. Furthermore the amount of women who are supposedly in a relationship with a "nice guy" and have attempted hard core flirtation (with me, the apathetic I'll say whatever the hell I want guy) is rather alarming. That last bit sort of sealed the deal in my mind.
  3. What's causing the rise of GIRLIE MEN?

    In the past when society was more primitive, masculinity was indeed just raw aggression. However, I believe that it transmuted itself into the drive that built up civilization. Furthermore, the cure to years of depression was found in embracing my own masculinity, basically doing exactly the opposite of what mainstream culture has told me my entire life. I don't care if someone is a "girly man" (whatever the hell that means). I have a problem when these men throw their more masculine counterparts under the PC bus so they can virtue signal and show how progressive they are. As far as the nice guy thing? It flat out doesn't work.
  4. The cry for the Wild Woman

    For most of my adult life I've alternated between feeling amazing and feeling like a pile of human trash. As I've grown older the peaks and troughs of of my mood have diminished. I was never diagnosed as bipolar but I'm almost certain I've experienced it to some degree. I will say it is still possible to leave Christianity and still be imprisoned by your mind. Do you have the original French text readily available? I know that subtle meaning and emotion are lost in translation.
  5. Thoughts On Crying?

    I cannot speak for others in this forum nor the perceptions of their respective cultures. I can speak from my own personal experiences however. Crying is one of the highest forms of emotional venting. Yes, I can vent out to others at the expense of respect. I trade the relief of emotional relief for respect from my peers. Getting to the point of tears is probably the equivalent of pissing your pants in public when you can't hold it anymore. You feel as if a tremendous discomfort has been removed from you but the the perception of you by others will take a comparable hit as urine soaked clothes. A couple of years ago, our male supervisor at work actually broke down in tears. I suppose it was a combination of being understaffed combined with marriage issues at home that caused him to crack. I noticed something strange in my perception of him, I could not seem to take him seriously after that and neither could the other guys. I knew logically why he broke down but there was a sort of subconscious, instinctual block preventing me from doing so. I noticed the same when I was supervisor myself and was open about my emotions. Is that instinctual block that I mentioned backed up by science? Who knows, good luck trying to fund a study in this culture that does everything in it's power to emasculate men. I can't afford to cry when a loved one passes away either. I have to be level headed and rational when every one else breaks down and behaves irrationally with grief. I can't afford to cry or be emotional around women who I have a romantic interest in, its a one way ticket to the friend zone. I can't even do this around friends because I will see a similar drop in respect as I do with coworkers. If I do shed a tear I will be sure that no one will see or know about out.
  6. A reality check to the newly deconverted.

    1. People make that "grass is greener on the other side" assumption all the time. How many posts on this site that bash Christian behavior? Do you not believe the newly deconverted not want to flee those social circles for something else? You only do this if you perceive that the alternative is better than what you have now. Do you actually interact much on a personal level with anyone here? 2. Based on your post history, you frequent the Spirituality forum, I think you'll find plenty of examples there. However, the the irrational beliefs that I am referring to don't necessarily pertain to alternate forms of spirituality. Any notion that the non religious are mostly rational went out the window this last election season. I left an atheist organization up in Miami because their Trump derangement syndrome was out of hand. It was unsubstantiated claim after unsubstantiated claim, hysteria about being deported (though they were US citizens/residents), etc. You will find this mindset extremely common when debating social issues and politics. Now don't get me wrong, there are rational atheists here, some backed me up when I got into a debate during the BLM debacles of last summer. However other than a belief in the Christian God, I found Atheists as irrational about certain topics as the rest of the population. If a newly deconverted person is expecting more objectivity in all areas like I was, I think they're a tad SOL. 3. Okay. As for the last question, expand on what you mean please.
  7. New Game: You Might be an Ex-Christian if.....

    My all time favorite sexually repressed song... https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YYRc0JeQuC0
  8. Fear of Death

    I have a view of death that is divergent from anything I've seen here so far. We die a little every day as bits and pieces of ourselves go away. I mean this literally (death at the cellular level) to metaphorically (there are places, objects, and people who are part of us that disappear forever). Our life is a symphony of mortality that builds up to that final measure, our ultimate demise. I was also dead from the time of the big bang to the union of a sperm and egg. It is the default state we will be in for all but this infinitesimal sliver of time. It is perfect neutrality as non existence is neither painful or pleasurable, good or bad. I've given this much thought over the last few years after realizing that there probably isn't an afterlife. The peace that I drawn from this is greater than being at the mercy of a capricious deity. It certainly beats the infinite church service scenario that Ag_NO_stic describes. Indeed, I find Christians to be greedy in this regard. They can't be content with this precious sliver of consciousness they've been served. They feel the need to consume it for eternity.
  9. When Did You First Doubt?

    Doubt has always been there from day 1. It didn't matter how far in over my head I was, doubt was the one constant that reared it's head.
  10. The following may not apply to someone who came from a virulent/toxic strain of Christianity. For those individuals, breaking away from those circles can only be an improvement. If you come from a moderate form of the faith like me, then I've found the following to be true. 1. Atheists will let you down at the same rate as Christians. Many, including myself have made the assumption a lack of belief = better human beings but this isn't the case. Thinking otherwise will only leave you disappointed. The advantage that we get from a lack of belief is the ability to work out our shortcomings with a foundation in reality though. 2. Atheist will still hold other irrational beliefs. A quick tour of this forum will quickly confirm that. This must be accepted as yet another quirk of human nature. 3. Completely purging your Christian friends is not a wise choice. Some (including myself again) have done this out of rebellion. If they are entirely defined by religion (all they talk about is Jesus) then yeah, there isn't really a reason to associate with them. However, if they don't meet that criteria then you must apply the last part of point two to them as well. Recently, these Christians have lifted me up when non believers let me down so reconnecting with them was a good idea. It might be difficult to adhere to these right now because you're filled with emotions. However, at least in my experience, accepting these early on would have spared me some grief. Once again, this might only apply of you escaped a moderate or liberal strain of Christianity like I did. If you came from a toxic fundy background then chances are points 1 and 3 do not apply.
  11. I must leave Ex-C for the well being of others.

    As of this moment, the only reason I'm not slipping into complete hermithood is because of a single message from a friend. She said that my words brought her to (happy) tears and gave her the energy to go about her week despite emotional setbacks. I compared her to the a flower that managed to bloom on a rocky, wave swept outcrop I saw on the California coast. I know it sounds cheesy as hell but it worked. The irony is, this person is an Christian friend who I've managed to reconnect with. There have been a couple of people who've messaged me on here, I do appreciate that. I also appreciate the encouragement of the posts. However, in a grand twist of fate the people who are currently having the most positive impact on me are religious friends. People who I turned my back on when I deconverted. No, they aren't your back water believers either, there is actually an interesting story here but is beyond the scope of this post. I actually feel more free being myself around them now than I do with people here. I will stay on Ex-C for now but will simply use much greater care.
  12. I must leave Ex-C for the well being of others.

    Okay, I'm going to give this a few more days of thought. I'll contact you Margee if I decide to terminate my account.
  13. I must leave Ex-C for the well being of others.

    Yunea, I will send you a message explaining what happened further.
  14. I must leave Ex-C for the well being of others.

    The guilt that I currently posses quells everything else. I've heard similar comments to the ones presented here before.
  15. I don't know where to begin. You can say that I'm at the end of my rope right now. I've been on this site for a good four years and when I joined I didn't really think too much of it. The individuals who've I've gotten to know range from those who casually chat, to friends that I physically go visit, to two past dating relationships. However, recent events have caused me to come to a grim realization. The net effect of those interactions has always been negative towards the other person. I am truly vile and toxic and need to be contained in my own solitude. No amount of effort I've put into changing myself and no method has yielded any fruit. With that said, I ask moderators to please delete my profile permanently. I do this as an act of compassion and caring. That is all I have to day.