Regular Member
  • Content count

  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won


Daffodil last won the day on February 27

Daffodil had the most liked content!

Community Reputation

1,163 Wow

About Daffodil

  • Rank
  • Birthday 10/26/1967

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Location
  • Interests
    Family, walking/hiking, reading, psychology, simple living, minimalism
  • More About Me
    Easygoing, in awe of nature, insatiably curious, politically independent

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?

Recent Profile Visitors

467 profile views
  1. Sweet justice! Can't have your cake and eat it too! So do you want the cake or do you want to eat it, lol! Now how long will it take for them to figure out a way to weasel out of that one?
  2. This is now out on Netflix and I just finished it. Holy crap! How does an actual cult (with absolutely every hallmark of a cult) grow and gain the following and mass allegiance this thing has!? There are certainly some similarities to any religion, but this goes so far beyond anything else I've ever seen! I would love to hear any thoughts from anyone who has seen this.
  3. I am very skeptical of UFO sightings as well, though I don't doubt that people saw something they can't explain. However on your second story, could it have been a dream? I have a similar experience in which I had a crystal clear memory of going to preschool. I could remember, in detail, the building, the hallways, the classrooms, the playground, the day they brought a horse to stand just outside the fence so we could all see it and pet it. I remember my mom walking me up the walkway to the door to go in. I also had a crystal clear memory of being taken to the university as a young child and being left with a college student who took me to the university museum with a giant mammoth in the front gallery (we lived in Lincoln, NE at the time and it was called Mammoth Hall). The student also took me to get ice cream. I believed it was some sort of project for the student or something. As a teenager, I mentioned this to my parents and they both looked at me like I had lost my mind! They said I never went to preschool and that they never would have left me with a college student on campus as a small child! I was dumbfounded and argued with them for a long time before finally concluding that it must have been an exceptionally detailed dream! It really is amazing what the brain can do!
  4. Or because religious fanatics killed it. There are supposedly mass amounts of lost knowledge when things like the library of Alexandria are burned down. There is dispute over who was responsible and how it burned down, but considering this was long before the printing press and there was likely only one copy of each item in there, who knows what ancient knowledge was lost! Look at what ISIS did to the ancient artifacts they encountered on their drive through Iraq and Syria! I have no doubt that ancient peoples were more than capable of figuring out how to move massive stones and lift them into place. We just, in our arrogance, fail to have the imagination to believe it. After all, there really is nothing new under the sun.
  5. Stop Pet Shaming!

    It's just sad. This kind of thing didn't used to be accepted at all and was quite rare. Of course the flip side of it was all the unhealthy diets women used to put themselves through to attain a standard that is near impossible for any but a tiny genetically lucky few. At some point a percentage of them just gave up and jumped on the diversity bandwagon, claiming that body size is also diverse and should be celebrated. Unfortunately for them, unlike skin color or sex which have no medical issues, obesity is closely tied to so many adverse health issues. If you notice the plus-size bloggers are all young. Why are there not any over 40's bloggers promoting how their enormous size does not affect their health!? Because it does! And it doesn't show up until they are over 40. Then they all either start desperately trying to lose weight or they say "Screw the doctors!" and are dead by the time they're 60.
  6. 13th Doctor a woman: Jodi Whitaker.

    I know. I just meant it was odd as far as people's expectations. Dr. Who has always been a man, just as James Bond has. I find it less odd to have a black James Bond than a female Dr. Who. Like I said, I'll give her a chance because I love the show, and maybe she'll be amazing!
  7. Stop Pet Shaming!

    I beg to disagree. She may be "healthy" right now because she is young and the damage she is doing happens over time. Give her another ten years and she will not be able to say she is "healthy".
  8. 13th Doctor a woman: Jodi Whitaker.

    I don't know. Certainly the character was written to be either/or, but it will be interesting to see how the viewership stays the same or drops. I'll give her a chance, but it is odd, like James Bond becoming Jasmine Bond or something.
  9. Losing Your Faith and Mental Health

    Well I don't follow the track you described of childhood trauma. My father had depression and panic attacks, so I must have inherited that. However, I was raised in a loving two-parent home within a mainline denominational mindset (so no crazy talk of going to hell and such), and suffered no abuse or neglect of any kind. I was painfully shy and awkward and introverted and developed symptoms of depression including suicidal ideation as an early teenager. Had no idea I was depressed until having my first panic attacks in my early thirties. When the doctor said I was depressed, it all made sense. I was an evangelical by that time, though, and struggled with the faith issues of it. If I had more faith, would it go away? If I prayed more/harder/better would it go away? Why would god let this happen to me? Is this my "thorn in the flesh"? If I take medication, am I showing a lack of faith in god? After going on meds, then feeling guilty and going off again, then struggling and going back on again, then going off again in an attempt to "cleanse" my body of all unnatural things (including birth control pills, sugar, gluten, etc.), and being ok for about a year and a half, I crashed hard mentally (I wouldn't exactly call it a breakdown, but it was very bad). Scared the crap out of myself and made the decision that regardless of faith and god, my kids needed me and I couldn't keep up this on-again/off-again game anymore. I got on a different antidepressant with fewer side effects and started the process of justifying my decision within a faith mindset. Not easy, and I don't recommend it to anyone! Now as a deconvert, I am much happier and at ease with myself. Instead of trying to justify my depression or my use of meds for it, I can just relax in the knowledge that I'm just one of the unfortunate mental health lottery winners - it is just another disability like being blind or missing a limb or being diabetic. I'd certainly rather not have it, but I don't beat myself up about it either. I understand how being raised with the threat of hell and the promise of heaven would make it difficult to adjust to a future of oblivion after death. For me, I was never in a church that focused on hell, and for whatever reason, I was never much interested in heaven. It was too nebulous a concept for a concrete-rational thinker such as myself. I was only ever interested in the here and now. That may also be why I don't dwell much on what happens after I die now. And on top of all that, my deconversion happened slowly over many years. I tried hard to make the Bible make sense, and only slowly shed pieces of it and my faith as I went along. I think the slowness of it helped me to make adjustments as I went instead of a sudden loss of everything I had been relying on.
  10. And citsonga, this is not directed at you. You made it clear that you would have lost your son had you not made the decisions you did regarding him. I am just concerned about other kids whose parents/doctors may be a little too quick to jump on the wagon before fully considering all the ramifications and alternative treatments.
  11. That is a long but excellent read. The part that intrigued me the most was this: *The euphoria wore off after a few months, but Ryan decided to continue his detransition. He'd come to the conclusion that dysphoria is normal—ordinary, even—and he'd found new ways to deal with it: movement, therapy, and accepting that he cannot control the way the world sees him. No one can. Ryan knows everyone's experience is different, but for him, changing his body ultimately wasn't the most effective way of dealing with his dysphoria. "You can change your body through hormones or surgery," he said, "but unless you accept it, the dysphoria will not go away." Ryan will never entirely get his old body back—there are some things that cannot be reversed—but he's learning to live with it.* One of the things that concerns me about transitioning kids is the fact that they are so far from full maturity. Teenagers of all types have emotional issues to deal with, social lessons to learn and master, self-soothing techniques to develop. Trans kids are no different. This man was able to find ways to handle his dysphoria that did not require extreme measures (unfortunately after he had already tried the extreme measures and found them lacking). how many kids tell their parents and doctors that they have dysphoria and are quickly ushered through the process rather than trying every possible way to deal with it without the extreme measures?
  12. I really appreciate that you all have allowed me to push the envelope here. I have no ill will toward anyone when I ask these questions. Back to an earlier post, if legitimate questions from someone just trying to understand are shut down through the use of those buzz words we talked about earlier, there is no opportunity to change attitudes. By allowing me to ask uncomfortable questions, I feel like I have a better grasp of it and more compassion for those dealing with it. Thank you!
  13. Thank you so much for sharing that, citsonga. I'm really glad your son is still with you and doing so well.
  14. If transgendered people acknowledge that they have dysphoria, then it occurs to me that one way to make people understand and accept it better might be for them to say, "I have a mental health disorder and the only treatment is surgery/hormonal manipulation." Instead, they say that, again just as homosexuals do, they were born that way and should be accepted. As someone with clinical depression, I don't exactly want to announce to every person I meet that I have a mental health issue, and it took me awhile to accept that this issue was going to be a lifelong one, so I understand any reluctance to do so. How exactly do clinicians determine what is a disorder and what is just a (at a loss for words, here!) "variation" of normal? Is it by sheer numbers? Whether or not the person can function? Narcissism is a disorder, but the only people who have difficulty functioning are the people who live and/or work with the narcissist, not the narcissists themselves.
  15. We can push this further, though I suspect I'm on the verge of stepping over the line here. Suicidal people have such severe mental health issues that they feel that suicide is their only option. We don't advocate to allow that, but rather continue to try to help them. (I know there are those in the right-to-die camp that say that should be allowed in extreme cases where drugs and therapy have proven useless, but those are in the minority). I'm just trying to figure out where it is a "disorder" that needs mental health treatment and where it is an acceptable variation of humanity (like homosexuality) but needs surgery/hormonal manipulation. And for the record, I hesitate to even compare it to homosexuality because homosexuality requires no body modification.