ag_NO_stic

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ag_NO_stic last won the day on August 2

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About ag_NO_stic

  • Rank
    Authentic Pastafarian
  • Birthday June 6

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Interests
    Food. Life. People. Laughter.
  • More About Me
    I am Jess. My name's a good start.

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    Damn good sandwiches elicit "hallelujahs" from me.

Recent Profile Visitors

685 profile views
  1. Wifey Worries.......

    Ohhh, DB. :'( I so want to give you a hug right now, this sucks. I think everyone is giving you sage advice though, step back, and take some deep breaths and let her grieve the husband she married who is now different. You are right that you are the same person, but you are also changing in unbidden and scary ways that she must deal with whether she wants to or not. It's not ultimately acceptable to be unkind to you, but we all have bad days. I have experienced many moments that felt crushing, devastating, and unsurpassable at the time...not just with my marriage. I got past them. I can tell you that backing down from pointing out bible stuff has helped my relationship with my husband. He has recently admitted to me that he is "not in a good place with god" but he didn't want to tell me because of how I'd been handling faith discussions. At the same time, I would be careful with making one-sided compromises. You can be gentle and compassionate with her, love her fiercely, and hold her through these uncharted waters. However, either you both need to respect beliefs or both compromise. I think there is a way to say, gently, that you will not be attending church, but that she is welcome to go. Or if she would like you to go to church, then perhaps you could listen to Bart Ehrman audiobooks on the way there, or whatever. If she refuses to do this or if you don't mention this to her and do what she wants, she will not learn that this "same, but different" you is permanent. It's funny how empowering it is to demonstrate the fruits of your own morality through actual deliberate effort, not waiting on some spirit, eh? Time is a great and very powerful healer. Keep your head high, take each week a day at time and each day a moment at a time. Some of those moments will suck ass, but you have to allow yourself to feel and accept those moments too. You'll get through it. Those weeks will become months and then years and you'll look back and see that what felt like a mountain was just a shitty pothole in the road that is your life.
  2. New Christian Viral Video

    Lol Erhman was on that list...Did whoever made this video know ANYTHING of Erhman's? I'm a lil baby deconvert still getting my feet wet with these scholars, but I know Erhman. Also....if doubting Thomas got to see Jesus for himself, why can't we? Why did Jesus care enough to "prove he was alive" to him, but prefers that everyone else believe without evidence? *sigh*
  3. I'm not sure I could have said this better myself. I think, at the time, I found ways to explain things that happened to me as being from God and truly believed it. Now, after studying human nature and psychology more, I know that it was just confirmation bias. I was looking for what I wanted to see. I think confirmation bias is a HUGE THING with religion....the human brain is capable of a lot when it is convinced of something. Same. I always faithfully waited for something, but I never believed other people when they had some kind of experience. I was just too skeptical, I guess. My mind was BLOWN when I realized the "god" in my head was a combination of my voice and my mother's negative narcissistic one.
  4. Ex-C losing popularity

    For me, personally, I have started to be more at peace with where I am. I have accepted that I could not control indoctrination but that I can control not staying that way....and you can only say the same Matt-Dillahunty-Bart-Erhman buzz word phrases so many times before you realize that there isn't much you can do to get people to open their eyes until they're ready. I also felt like venting my personal problems on here all the time without doing something about it was a bit of a time waste. Ex-C has a special place in my heart and it brings me comfort. I still visit but the posting, at least for me, is kinda the same thing reworded over and over. I'm willing to do it, but I'm far less up in arms about it, I've calmed.
  5. Optimism, Pessimism and Feminism

    Yes, I too am curious about what "this kind of posting" means. If by that you mean "different opinions" than I guess it is cool here. If you are referring to a particular post, perhaps you could clarify what offended?
  6. The Reality of Transgenders

    This is seriously where I am with this whole thing. I see both sides completely. I have respect for these people. I don't particularly want to have an opinion on it, but it being so public kind of forces me to think about it and "decide." All my developmental classes in psychology have convinced me that a child cannot make these decisions, but that doesn't mean I am right or I know they aren't. I have to crunch on @Jedah's comments, because I tend to agree with them. I get so confused though when I speak with people who have personal experience with trans people such as @Citsonga who just want to keep their child alive. It's so very complex. I wouldn't want my child to commit suicide when there are options, albeit not great ones. So...."damned if you do, damned if you don't" is my motto.
  7. Optimism, Pessimism and Feminism

    I get so mad about this because it takes away from the seriousness and tragedy of actual rape.
  8. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    That's weird, I responded yesterday and said I needed to sift through this. Will respond in depth soon.
  9. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    I agree with something you said earlier about things coming off harsher than they would seem spoken. I feel like I came off harsher too, for the record. Would you mind helping to define some of the viewpoints you are interested in / reject? For example, some things you really believe or really loathe, maybe a summary sentence? I love to discuss philosophical concepts and challenge my own thinking, I'm just not as familiar with many of the definitions. I was familiar with the ones I mentioned in my other post. I'm sure I could google it too....
  10. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    I truly didn't mean to have your conversation devolve, I certainly wasn't trying to be petty, and I didn't plan on nitpicking either. I was just honestly surprised at your response to my perspective on labels. It went a bit downhill from there and I'm happy to apologize for overlooking your ultimate point, I just didn't expect your response and felt I should defend my perspective. I understand that you were likely looking for a more academic response and I'm happy to provide an attempt at such, though my experience and understanding of the concepts you mentioned are limited (sorry, homeschooled the christian way lol). I tend to view pragmatism and methodological naturalism very positively (pun absolutely intended), I just don't think they are 100% correct. I don't think it would be practical to assume that any theory or philosophy is 100% correct, how's that for a mindfuck. I think, personally, I have left a bit of wiggle room for the complex nature of what it is to be human. I'm sure this is "made in the image of god" leftovers, I'm still deconverting, but there just seems to be something a bit special about how humans have evolved. I think the capacity for our spirituality is fascinating, though it has certainly had repercussions. I find myself very curious as opposed to "decided" with regard to what I believe. I tend to reject impractical things and things that aren't scientifically/logically provable, such as ghosts, spirits, demons, miracles, etc....but that doesn't change how I feel when I'm alone on the beach with my toes digging in the sand, the wind in my hair, sun kissing my face, I feel that more is out there. I don't feel completely alone, though I reject most religions. I hope this makes sense. Also, to clarify, I am perfectly comfortable to tell you that you are behaving like an asshole. I think labeling you an asshole would negate all that you are that I cannot see, minimize all that you have to offer the world, and that you should not be put in a box. But I'm happy to label behaviors.
  11. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    I feel like you're confusing "labels" with "definitions." Using words like "good" and "evil" are not referencing people so much as abstract concepts and warrant a clear definition. If you ARE using them to label people, I'm not interested. Also, I'm not saying "I don't want to be labeled" (though I don't really), I'm saying I'm not interested in doing that to others. It does nothing that a discussion of ideas can't do, arguably with less efficiency.
  12. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    I think you're missing my point. Saying "I'm an atheist" is no more helpful than saying "I'm not convinced there is a god." Some labels are necessary, sure. As a female, I have various gender-specific needs....but what would be the point of labeling yourself verses discussing beliefs?
  13. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    I have nothing against you, personally, but I don't really give a fuck if you think it's a "lame cop-out." I don't consider myself to be "smarter than theists," I consider myself more "aware of my indoctrination" and perhaps "more courageous for being willing to face hell and the loss of relationships to find the truth." I think labeling other people's beliefs as "lame" or "a cop-out" gets people on the defensive and hinders discussion. The things that you listed are things you believe not labels, so it doesn't even apply to what I said anyway. I too believe adamantly in anti-censorship. I believe if we allow ideas to be freely discussed than the need to say extreme or "offensive" things will wane and we can get to the meat of discussions. I am most concerned with this "us versus them" mentality that bipartisanship creates. I think this mentality has exploded, we have races against each other, genders against each other, political parties against each other, religious versus nonreligious, straight vs gay (and LGBTQ)......Each side needs to approach the social discussion with some desire to understand the other side. It's the only way anything will get done. I am largely tired of everyone firmly believing that everything they believe is right and that others are wrong. It's emotionally and mentally draining.
  14. @LogicalFallacy already did a great job, but doesn't mean I want to ignore you by any means. The example I gave was my misunderstanding as a young child, when I remember reading about god being jealous and wondering why we weren't allowed. I have since heard the biblical reasoning and moved on to the more troubling forms of bible god's hypocrisy. All of that to say "jealous" is still a negative word, in my humble opinion, and the excuse wouldn't hold weight if I tried to explain away my insecure behavior as "being jealous for my husband's love." It is 100% selfish jealousy, he doesn't want any gods before himself. It is possessively, selfishly jealous. Your entire argument hinges on "sin" which I reject. What is sin? Stuff "god" doesn't like? How do we know "god" doesn't like it? Because a book claims to speak for "god" and defines things that "god" finds abhorrent? The entire christian argument depends ENTIRELY on the assumption of a god. You have to do mental acrobatics to fit broken arguments into the narrative. "God" has never introduced himself to me, smote me for "disobedience," or made clear what he does or does not like. Just because Joe Schmoe says that "god" says that Jesus is his son and that we need to be saved from things because he doesn't like them, via some ancient book, does not mean I have to listen to it. If the bible were historically accurate, or held truths unknown to people at the time it was written, or was morally appropriate/consistent, or even made into an audiobook narrated by Yahweh himself, I would not believe it until he showed up, said hi, and told me himself. Why, if "god is omnipotent" and "doesn't want me to go to hell" would it be unrealistic for me to expect basic interaction? Because perhaps he does not exist and you must now say that "god doesn't speak to us audibly" etc. And what sucks for you even more is that, according to you, "god" made my brain/skepticism this way and, also according to christianity, the gift of "faith" has apparently not been given to me. So lookin like there's nothing I can do anyway.
  15. You aren't a Christian, so what are you?

    Frankly? I am opposed to over labeling people/things. I am happy to state things I do or do not believe in (for example I am interested in the concept of pantheism at the moment), but I would not say "I am a pantheist." I hate label politics lately in general, who I am is more complex than a series of labels like "a straight, white, female, agnostic, libertarian, employee of ___, daughter of ___, cynic." I just think it boxes people in and links them to other worldviews that they may not accept or believe. I think it's possible to be comfortable with who I am and have security in my identity without a long list of labels.