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Ex Born-again Christian - So Glad To Have Found This Webiste!


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#1 Zetetic

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 02:00 AM

Hi,

I just wanted to introduce myself (if anybody cares) and mention that I'm so glad I found this web site! One of my favorite groups on MySpace was the "Saved From Christianity" group. Then one day it was gone. I don't know if the owner got fed up with it one day because of all the people criticizing it (like one self righteous b... who compared them to Nazis) or if it was deleted by the MySpace gods because they thought it was prejudicial towards Christians...but, whatever the reason, I missed it.

So I'm really glad I found this web site. I know some people consider it prejudicial to criticize other religions but I think it's completely fair when you used to be brain-washed by that religion and wasted half your life because of it's nonsense. I also think it's fair to criticize it when it promotes prejudice and intolerance.

As for me, I was a devout "born-again" Christian from age 13 to my early twenties. I was totally into the witnessing thing, "laying on of hands", casting out demons, dancing in the aisles, being slain in the spirit, speaking in tongues, etc. It's hard to say exactly when I became no longer "born again". I drifted away from it gradually and it wasn't until my late 30s that I finally started calling myself a non-Christian. My reasons for drifting away from Christianity are that I just started to see more and more contradictions. In particular, reading the Old Testament with a more critical eye, it appeared that the god of the Old Testament was thoroughly evil. As a Christian, you can't even think of such things so you come up with all kinds of rationalizations for the atrocities committed by the god of the old testament, but as I saw more and more illogic, I was finally able to recognize it.

Probably another reason is, that I saw my brother and his wife totally screw up their lives and the lives of their children while they were devout "born again" Christians. Shouldn't god have helped them instead of screwing them up? I guess not. They seemed to get more and more hateful and intolerant as the years passed. To hear them talk, you would think that we should actually torture criminals and nuke Muslims.

At this point in my life, I am completely convinced that there is no omniscient, omnipotent, omnipresent, good deity. If there is a deity in control of this universe, then it is either evil or doesn't care about us or pay attention to us. Actually, one theory I have is that we only exist so that he can consume our souls when we die :-) J.K.! But then again, you never know! One of these days I'm going to start a web site called www.godeatspeople.org :-) Actually, now that I've mentioned it, I'd better go grab the domain right now before somebody else scarfs it up!

As to the question of the supernatural: I was born very gullible, naive and superstitious. I've worked very, very hard to re-train myself to be more logical and scientific in my thinking. Because of that, I force myself to never believe in anything. Period. I only think in terms of probabilities and never trust my own feelings or intuition. It's only when something's been thoroughly scientifically proven that I'm willing to accept it. That being said, there have been enough interesting events in my life that I think there is a slightly greater than 50/50 chance that there is something that we would call supernatural (though only because we don't know how it works yet). I really want there to be a supernatural and an after-life so I have to constantly force myself to re-evaluate my beliefs.

As to the question of deities? That's one that's still completely open for me. I don't even assign a probability to it at this point. I do know that I constantly "feel" the presence of other beings around me and often feel as if some of them are communicating with me. I never get the sense that any of them are "gods" though. There is one in particular who seems to infuse me with energy. Long before I knew anything about most mythologies, I "heard" "her" say, "I am the wind" and she seemed to associate "herself" strongly with the north wind. One day, a long time ago, I wrote a computer program to generate "random" words for my Dungeons & Dragons game. One of them leaped out at me and I used this word as the name for this being that I commune with. In researching mythology many years later, the Egyptian goddess Amanauter seemed to fit her very well. I also saw some resemblance to the Sumerian/Babylonian deity Ninlil.

I have an inner need to "revere" some kind of deity, but to me, there is no sense of inferiority nor a desire for submission. In some ways, I think of myself as her protector. I see her as having a kind of wisdom and knowledge that's superior to mine yet she has a vulnerability that requires protection from humans. Perhaps something like a child Princess who compels me to kneel before before her because of her kindness, gentleness and beauty.

Ok, I'm whacked! I don't care! At least I don't actually believe it...even if I sometimes act as if I do ;-)


Zetetic.


P.S. I also sometimes have a bizarre sense of humor (in case you hadn't guessed it from the Bunny with the pancake on it's head ;-)
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"Thou hast heard it said that thou shalt believe nothing of which thou hearest and only half of what thou readeth; but I say unto thee, thou shalt believe nothing of what thou heareth, nothing of what thou readeth, nothing of what thou seeeth; in fact, believe nothing at all. As much as possible, re-test, re-verify, re-validate, re-think and re-evaluate everything." --- Me.

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#2 Zetetic

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 02:03 AM

Eeeks! That's what I get for surfing while drunk! The name of the Egyptian goddess is Amaunet, not Amaunater. Amaunator (not sure of the spelling) is the name of a god in the computer game Baldur's Gate.
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"Thou hast heard it said that thou shalt believe nothing of which thou hearest and only half of what thou readeth; but I say unto thee, thou shalt believe nothing of what thou heareth, nothing of what thou readeth, nothing of what thou seeeth; in fact, believe nothing at all. As much as possible, re-test, re-verify, re-validate, re-think and re-evaluate everything." --- Me.

#3 hatepirate

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 03:06 AM

Welcome, Zetetic! :D
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#4 narcissist

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 06:02 AM

Hi,
P.S. I also sometimes have a bizarre sense of humor (in case you hadn't guessed it from the Bunny with the pancake on it's head ;-)

I have no idea what you are talking about, so...

Welcome aboard Zetetic.
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You can safely assume that you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do -- Anne Lamott


#5 Japedo

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 07:00 AM


Welcome to Ex-C Zetetic, it's wonderful to have you. Ex-C also has a myspace! :D
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It is impossible to defeat an ignorant man in argument. ~William G. McAdoo

#6 StewartP

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 08:28 AM

Zetetic - welcome home!

quick question - re: the talking in tongues thing. Were you faking it consciously, or did you let yourself go in group hysteria, or is it beyond explanation?

I am sincerely interested, I'm not mocking or having a laugh.

Regards

Stew
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A child of five would understand this. Send someone to fetch a child of five

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#7 riverbank

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 01:08 PM

As a Christian, you can't even think of such things so you come up with all kinds of rationalizations for the atrocities committed by the god of the old testament, but as I saw more and more illogic, I was finally able to recognize it.


very true .. whatever I say to my Christian friends regarding these things, they still feel the need to pray for me. It's called brainwashing i think.

anyway, welcome and hope you enjoy your stay here!
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'Better to dwell in a corner of a housetop, than in a house shared with a contentious woman' - Proverbs 21:9


#8 Taphophilia

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 01:52 PM

Welcome! :wave:
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O the stale old dogs who pretend to guard
the morals of the masses,
how smelly they make the great back-yard
wetting after everyone that passes.

-- The Young and Their Moral Guardians

#9 NotBlinded

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 02:39 PM

It's nice to have you here. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

P.S. It can't be a good thing to get your Gods mixed up. :grin:
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"Ultimate" reality is exactly the same as "mundane" reality. The transformative experience of the so-called mystic doesn't take us anywhere but here. In a more direct sense it's like turning on the light in a darkened living room. Doing so doesn't change the living room into the kitchen, but it does change how we are able to move through it. Rev R

#10 Legion

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 03:37 PM

Hey there Zetetic! Welcome to the forums.
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Posted Image


Living under the rise of tyranny.


#11 Eponymic

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 05:14 PM

Howdy hey!

Nice to have you here.
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May you all have the wisdom to think for yourselves and see the truth, not someone else's version of the truth.

#12 Varokhar

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 05:57 PM

Welcome aboard! :wave:

Good to hear you've left the deathcult behind. Life without crawling like a worm before a make-believe god is so much better, eh? :)
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#13 Amethyst

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Posted 06 February 2007 - 08:09 PM

It's nice to have you here. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

P.S. It can't be a good thing to get your Gods mixed up. :grin:


Especially fiction gods in computer games vs. real ones...

Just kidding! :D

I've played Baldur's Gate myself. Am currently playing World of Warcraft.
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Imagination is more important than knowledge. -- Albert Einstein

[Klingon] nuq Daq yuch Dapol? (Translated: Where is the Chocolate?)

#14 Zetetic

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Posted 07 February 2007 - 12:28 AM

It's nice to have you here. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

P.S. It can't be a good thing to get your Gods mixed up. :grin:


Especially fiction gods in computer games vs. real ones...

Just kidding! :D

I've played Baldur's Gate myself. Am currently playing World of Warcraft.


:lol: My goddess(es) doesn't(don't) seem to be chastising me so I think I'm ok. Whew, that was close! :eek:

I've thought of trying World of Warcraft but I know I'd get way too addicted!

Thanks everybody for all the warm welcomes. I'm overwhelmed with your hospitality!
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"Thou hast heard it said that thou shalt believe nothing of which thou hearest and only half of what thou readeth; but I say unto thee, thou shalt believe nothing of what thou heareth, nothing of what thou readeth, nothing of what thou seeeth; in fact, believe nothing at all. As much as possible, re-test, re-verify, re-validate, re-think and re-evaluate everything." --- Me.

#15 Zetetic

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Posted 07 February 2007 - 12:38 AM

Zetetic - welcome home!

quick question - re: the talking in tongues thing. Were you faking it consciously, or did you let yourself go in group hysteria, or is it beyond explanation?

I am sincerely interested, I'm not mocking or having a laugh.

Regards

Stew


I definitely wasn't faking it and it really wasn't at all hysterical. In fact, I still do it today any time I want. I don't have to get worked up emotionally or anything...though it does cause pleasant feelings. I don't believe it's anything supernatural though. I think it's just, kind of the way babies babble or something like that. One of the things I noticed is that most of the people who speak in tongues in public only use a few syllables over and over and over again and it sounds really stupid. Especially when somebody interprets those few syllables into some long complex prophecy. What nonsense! Mine is much more varied and rich though. I think it actually sounds like a real language. I guess maybe I have a talent for it, though it's a rather bizarre talent. :wacko_old:

Some people in the occult forum on MySpace have suggested it might be tapping into some sort of magic. Not that I believe in it...but, who knows?
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"Thou hast heard it said that thou shalt believe nothing of which thou hearest and only half of what thou readeth; but I say unto thee, thou shalt believe nothing of what thou heareth, nothing of what thou readeth, nothing of what thou seeeth; in fact, believe nothing at all. As much as possible, re-test, re-verify, re-validate, re-think and re-evaluate everything." --- Me.

#16 .god

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Posted 07 February 2007 - 07:44 AM

welcome :D


tapping into perhaps the magic of our brains? our minds, and our subconscious?
about the wind thing, I find that pretty interesting.. as I love windy semi-overcast days and the breeze, beautiful clouds scudding across the sky, the fresh air, and nature. It doesn't speak to me, but it makes me happy and alive and contemplative. But that's just me.. I know others who hate wind =)

though i find for reading people, trusting my intuition and feelings is the best way to go, because I suck horribly if i try to do it consciously. But if I just trust my subconscious feedback about their body language, the little nuance in their brows, pupil dilations, eye direction, facial muscles, voice, etc, etc.. stuff I don't really pay conscious attention to much personally.. but will cause a "feeling" in my body and mind as my brain processes all the input unconsciously. My problem is too often I ignore these little signs, or fail to interpret the signals correctly until after the fact. grr. Of course if the other person is really good at faking and lying with their body, you're screwed either way lol.
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#17 mick

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Posted 07 February 2007 - 07:12 PM

Welcome Zetetic,

>>In particular, reading the Old Testament with a more critical eye, it appeared that the god of the Old Testament was thoroughly evil.

That's really it in a nutshell for me now. I mean, it is also obvious that the Bible is rediculous and false for alot of other reasons as well. However, it is painfully OBVIOUS that the OT BibleGod is an Evil Character. Thankfully, he does not exist.
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#18 Zetetic

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Posted 08 February 2007 - 01:49 AM

welcome :D


tapping into perhaps the magic of our brains? our minds, and our subconscious?
about the wind thing, I find that pretty interesting.. as I love windy semi-overcast days and the breeze, beautiful clouds scudding across the sky, the fresh air, and nature. It doesn't speak to me, but it makes me happy and alive and contemplative. But that's just me.. I know others who hate wind =)

though i find for reading people, trusting my intuition and feelings is the best way to go, because I suck horribly if i try to do it consciously. But if I just trust my subconscious feedback about their body language, the little nuance in their brows, pupil dilations, eye direction, facial muscles, voice, etc, etc.. stuff I don't really pay conscious attention to much personally.. but will cause a "feeling" in my body and mind as my brain processes all the input unconsciously. My problem is too often I ignore these little signs, or fail to interpret the signals correctly until after the fact. grr. Of course if the other person is really good at faking and lying with their body, you're screwed either way lol.


I don't know what it is, but I love the wind. It brings a tremendous sense of calm and peace to me. Exactly the opposite of what you'd expect.
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"Thou hast heard it said that thou shalt believe nothing of which thou hearest and only half of what thou readeth; but I say unto thee, thou shalt believe nothing of what thou heareth, nothing of what thou readeth, nothing of what thou seeeth; in fact, believe nothing at all. As much as possible, re-test, re-verify, re-validate, re-think and re-evaluate everything." --- Me.

#19 Former Follier

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Posted 08 February 2007 - 10:27 AM

Greetings, Zetetic. Greetings to you all. I am a long-time observer of this site and just recently registered for an account. I was subject to 17 years in an Independent Baptist Church and attended the adjoining school from pre-school to my high school graduation day. I was finally able to move away from my parents, join the Army on a whim and open my eyes to the world. I'm appalled at the amount of misinformation that is given to Christian teens.

Have you ever wondered why the vast majority of Christian teens are subserviant? Because they are scared to death of going out into the world and not under the protective wing of their "church family." I's sad. Some of those kids have great potential but never reach it because they were brainwashed at sudh a young age.

I feel like I'm in the wrong profession (wireless communication); I should've gone into "the ministry." If you're an enterprising young entrepeneur with enough charisma, stage presence and hair gel, it can be quite lucrative. That's one of my many problems with most Christians and indeed all of Christianity today. . . aside from the insincerity and moral hauteur, of course.

It's been great getting to know all of you through your posts. I will be logged in from time to time but if someone would like to get ahold of me, my MSN Messenger contact is "greasy_punkabilly@yahoo.com." Take care, all.
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#20 Gnosis of Disbelief

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Posted 08 February 2007 - 10:41 PM

Welcome, Zetetic! :wave:

Congrats on escaping the death cult! Incidentally, it looks like someone's
already beaten you to the www.godeatspeople.org domain, although he or
she isn't doing much with it at the moment. Sounds like a great place for
a religious satire site, though!

Anyway, glad to have you on board!
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Where doubt is, there truth is - it is her shadow. -- Ambrose Bierce


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