Popular Post Brought None Posted January 8, 2012 Popular Post Share Posted January 8, 2012 FINALLY! Today I came out as gay to my parents! Damn I feel like a ton of bricks is off my back now! Parent's are fully supportive. We talked for a good few hours. Mom was asking me a ton of questions. Feel so strange right now. Having opened up like this to them. Will post more tomorrow. Right now I'm so drained. Need sleep! 23 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Noumena Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Good for you! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
lunaticheathen Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 YAY!!! Good for you! I'm very proud, and so glad they're supportive! Here's to you being the best you ever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
openpalm45 Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Way to go!! Im so proud of you, and so glad it went well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 That took guts. Sounds like you are lucky to have decent parents. Good for you. Maybe someday everyone will have decent parents. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
flockoff Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Happy for you. Give us the full story when you're rested! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted January 8, 2012 Moderator Share Posted January 8, 2012 yah Brought None! Good for for !! Now you go and make a happy life! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bronxo Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Hey BN, great to see you finally came out to your parents! A good thing they're being so supportive. I got you some eye-candy to keep going Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Suzy Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Wow, congratulations. It's great that your parents took it well. Are you out as a non-believer too? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Positivist Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 WOW! Good for you! That must feel so good! Cheers!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jblueep Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 So glad it went well for you BN. I'm sure it's great for you to shed the weight of having to hide who you really are Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brought None Posted January 8, 2012 Author Share Posted January 8, 2012 Hey BN, great to see you finally came out to your parents! A good thing they're being so supportive. I got you some eye-candy to keep going Mmmmmmm. Wow, congratulations. It's great that your parents took it well. Are you out as a non-believer too? No, I haven't told them. That's going to be another issue for down the road. They don't want to see me loose my faith. And that they want me in heaven. So Im still in the closet there. I have been wanting to do this for quiet some time, but kept chickening out. Last night I had all my stuff packed and in my car, just in case of a fallout, and I just told them. There was a mental pause at first and it was like hitting a speed bump. Hit it once and your over it. They've known something was up. Seeing how I just haven't been myself for while. They want to see me happy is what it boils down to. Zero negative reaction. They are very liberal in their views. Supportive of gay marriage, rights, ect. I had never heard them really express this in the past and only had the surrounding environment and people who are antigay, so I thought my parents might have been. And at times I've heard what might of been mixed signals they were sending, perhaps to just blend in with the others to not rock the opinion boat. So I misjudged. My parents understood why. There was a TON of bonding. Mom cried a lot and apologized if there was anything she has said in the past to make me afraid to tell them. She was the one doing most of the talking to me wanting to know lots of things and kept letting me know "You've got to teach us cause we've got to learn about this as well." I feel so much more at ease around them. Even cracked some jokes. There was an event before hand I came in for. My mom was thanking me: "Thank you for coming home." and I responded "And coming out?" Driving back felt like such a short trip. Mind is so much clearer, positive thoughts in my mind about possible futures I can have now that this repression is finally dead. Really, I feel lighter and more confident now about myself. Gotta go to the store to restock the fridge. Will type ore on the subject. Seriously there was so much we talked about! 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BrotherJosh Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 Congrats BN!!! Glad to hear it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kclark Posted January 8, 2012 Share Posted January 8, 2012 YAY! Congrats BN! So glad your parents are supportive. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
noob Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Congratulations, Brought None! I am so happy for you. I'm sure the relief is tremendous!!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Foxy Methoxy Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Well done! Glad to hear your parents are accepting of you Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brought None Posted January 9, 2012 Author Share Posted January 9, 2012 I'm still going to/have to lay low. Mainly cause the parents ARE back home in a VERY antigay area and Dad has already expressed that if someone back home decided to give them crap about me being gay, he is liable to do something that may get him thrown in jail. And this is going to be a major transition for them as well as me. It's not like I'm going to go out side now everyday like a one man band parade machine with a banner screaming I'm gay. I'm still going to only tell those I trust. It still feels unreal, like a dream. I know I misjudged my parents by being afraid to tell them earlier, and thus feel bad about about it. But I've told them now and that's what counts. Time marches forward and so must I. This has been the most difficult thing I've done thus far in my life and yet it's not over. I'll have to continue to do this throughout most of my life. Amazing though... it was just two words. "I'm gay." These words where not bellowed out like a bull horn, but just said in a usual non nondistracting conversational voice to two parents lent their ears to what I had to say. A simple vocal acknowledge which a majority of people will never have to endure due to being in the society norm. The years of built up tension, repression, mental fear, the accumulated lies learned by society, the thoughts of possible negative outcomes, and just plain social baggage all of which I could write endlessly about... to feel it literally shatter like glass. There was no take back worries, no cold sweat, no fear... just the air in the room, a silent break in time and space where the next breath taken is really... you. You after taking a wrecking ball to that concrete vault of incasement. You, the real you. Feel stronger now, gained self insight as well outer, formed a tighter bond with my parents, and for once have real confidence in my self for which to build upon. My mind reels back to the amount of time spent in that incubation period of self loathing where isolation was an anchor to a slowly sinking ship of the self. If I had continued that stagnated hold of hidding then I never would have known what I know now. Still can't believe I did it, but here I am with a grin reflectively typing about it in hopes other perhaps others reading can gain courage too. I am thankful my parents truly are wonderful parents that love me unconditionally. Like an astronaut I find a whole new set of dynamics before me to recalibrate to, new territory to venture forth on, new emotions to explore, a new slate in which to mark on... a new me. Didn't mean for this post to run such a long course, but I truly feel like a different person right now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Galien Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 Your post made me cry. I am so happy for you BN. This has played on your heart for so long, and I am so pleased for you that they accepted it so well.Big fat hugs Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zaphod Posted January 9, 2012 Share Posted January 9, 2012 If I could go back and relive any part of my life, it would be the first two or three years of my coming out as gay. The excitement of starting a new life and finally finding people who understood me and could relate to me... I miss that sense of newness. I'm very excited for you and for the joy and relief that the next few months are going to bring you. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brought None Posted January 10, 2012 Author Share Posted January 10, 2012 The following Sunday morning Mom was still talking and asking questions. She told me she was proud at how unbelievably mature I was during the whole process of coming out. How I kept calm, answered questions as best as I could, showed I knew what I was talking about without talking down, showed confidence in what I said, was honest with them, and even showed some humor which really helped break some tension. We talked about the area I grew up in, the fact it is ver rural. Oh what else, there was just so much discussed. She talked to me about people in town to avoid about it whom whole be physically violent towards me... people I've known since I was young. It's amazing learning this stuff and back histories of other gay people that lived in town and what they went through. The community is something. Small town rural which is a beautiful place to live, but underneath that pristine shine is a razor wired mess of gossip spreaders just aching to catching anyone's flaws. Just too many people in the area with too damn much to prove. At least now they know why I've been such an introvert. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 I'm still going to only tell those I trust. That is a good idea. I hope you keep the list very short. Some people are dangerous and you don't want word to get around to them. It still feels unreal, like a dream. I know I misjudged my parents by being afraid to tell them earlier, and thus feel bad about about it. Don't. You are lucky. You had no way to know they would be so cool about it. Everyone in that situation should be cautious. The same applies for when we come out about being ex-Christians. Always be careful. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Egaugnal Posted January 10, 2012 Share Posted January 10, 2012 And to you Brought None I say Bravo Good Sir! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
decafaholic Posted January 11, 2012 Share Posted January 11, 2012 I am so happy for you!! It takes so much courage to reveal who you really are to someone. I'm so glad your parents were supportive! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ ficino ♦ Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 Very glad to hear of your step and how it's gone since then. Bravo! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Xerces Posted January 12, 2012 Share Posted January 12, 2012 Great news! Tennessee is becoming an even harder place to be openly gay especially with that wart covered cock Bill Haslam in office. I applaud your courage and bravery. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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