Breaking Soul Ties

[Zephie]

So there's this conversation in Rants and Replies about Evangelism being better than social networking and sex. What I was wondering is if anyone has ever had to repent of each person they've ever slept with and break "soul ties" with that person. If you're unaware of what that is...basically I soul tie is formed through close friendships and many times through sex-according to some Christians. I remember doing this several times. Has anyone else ever had to do this?

[blackpudd1n]

So there's this conversation in Rants and Replies about Evangelism being better than social networking and sex. What I was wondering is if anyone has ever had to repent of each person they've ever slept with and break "soul ties" with that person. If you're unaware of what that is...basically I soul tie is formed through close friendships and many times through sex-according to some Christians. I remember doing this several times. Has anyone else ever had to do this?

 

Oh yeah, they made me do it a few times. Also involved confessing to someone else what you'd be getting up to, and having someone else keep you "accountable". Ugh. Talk about a control mechanism!

[LivingLife]

Yup I was one of them. Ironic as those were some fond memories even though they did not develop into lasting relationships. I was a serial monogamist even with my many GF's.'

 

Lifetime evangelicals do not understand the term friends with benefits or more crudely "f**k buddies"

[ConureDelSol]

I've never had sex, so I can't say that's happened before. I can say that my obsession with gay romance stories made me always temporarily cut myself off from the friends that introduced me to it. Then a few months later I wouldn't feel guilty anymore and would go right back to them.

[Llwellyn]

I remember hearing about this terminology. If Christians use this phrase to mean affectionate interconnection developed through physical pleasure, then it seems bizarre to want to "break" it. But with Christianity, good is bad and bad is good, so I suppose I shouldn't be surprised by their perverse attitudes and behavior.

[Zephie]

I remember hearing about this terminology. If Christians use this phrase to mean affectionate interconnection developed through physical pleasure, then it seems bizarre to want to "break" it.

 

My thinking is that it comes through the connection developed between to people with either a close friendship or when two people have sex. It's basically like saying that if you fuck someone then you've tied your soul with them. The whole one flesh thing. I would get talked into feeling guilty about past relationships then confessing everything I'd done. Then repenting. The funny thing is I would do the crying repenting thing over and over again even though I'd supposedly already been forgiven. It's strange really.

 

It's absoultely a mind control. They come up with these lists about how to live your life and what's good/bad. Everything about the Christian religion, at least, seems to be about control. Control of money, my body, my thoughts, my education, where I live, etc.

[Akheia]

Holy shit, Christianity has gotten way more kinky and voyeuristic than when I was in. What the fuck business is it of theirs? This is just hugely disturbing. Purity Balls, "courtship", "soul ties", McCarthyesque sex inquisitions... When did evangelicals become CollarMe.com?

[JoeCoastie]

So there's this conversation in Rants and Replies about Evangelism being better than social networking and sex. What I was wondering is if anyone has ever had to repent of each person they've ever slept with and break "soul ties" with that person. If you're unaware of what that is...basically I soul tie is formed through close friendships and many times through sex-according to some Christians. I remember doing this several times. Has anyone else ever had to do this?

So do they cut both "spiritual" and social ties with these people? Like telling your old friends that you can't hang out with them anymore because they'll drag you down into sin? An old friend of mine stopped hanging with me, because I wasn't a true Christian. I wonder if soul tie breaking had something to do with that.

[LivingLife]

The odd thing for me was this was 11 or so years ago and I was and still am happily married. There was some other shit happening in my life I cannot remember what it was and out of the blue the pastor asked me how many GF's I had before my wife. Bear in mind, my pastor was my golf partner too so we got to spend a lot of time together and discussed a lot more than what most folk get to discuss with their pastor.

 

See they need to find a reason for shit things happening to good people as obviously gawd is not really around. They have to dig into your past and convince you you were a lousy rotten sinner and despite the whole baptism in water and arising a new man/woman, somehow they cannot leave the buried person buried. Of course baptism merely made you a wet sinner as you really have not really repented and that is why shot is still happening. It all makes perfect sense.

 

Fucking idiots. It really boils down to that they do not believe that jeebus died for ALL of your sins. If it were that simple, there would be no hold they could exercise over you.

[Akheia]

It's a free gift, all right, but to get it you have to drive to their holiday lodge to listen to the day-long seminar and then join their MLM.

[blackpudd1n]

So there's this conversation in Rants and Replies about Evangelism being better than social networking and sex. What I was wondering is if anyone has ever had to repent of each person they've ever slept with and break "soul ties" with that person. If you're unaware of what that is...basically I soul tie is formed through close friendships and many times through sex-according to some Christians. I remember doing this several times. Has anyone else ever had to do this?

So do they cut both "spiritual" and social ties with these people? Like telling your old friends that you can't hang out with them anymore because they'll drag you down into sin? An old friend of mine stopped hanging with me, because I wasn't a true Christian. I wonder if soul tie breaking had something to do with that.

 

More than likely. Anything that was considered a bad influence over you had to be broken, plain and simple. And part of that was usually encouraging people to stay away from those bad influences.

[Deva]

No, and the idea is now completely ridiculous to me. I have been around so long that I have been with every person I have ever met, in one form or another-many non-human. If I had to "repent", i would be doing it forever. That is what a view of reincarnation does for ya!

[Positivist]

I think this stems from Bill Gothard type fundy thinking. Gothard's group is very intent on each young person, prior to dating (which is exclusively for marriage minded people), being pure and 'undefiled' and not 'defrauded' in any way relationally or sexually. If they have a past of any kind, they need to pray special prayers to break soul ties with the people they were involved with (ranging from kissing and heavy petting* to sex).

 

Personally, I've come to view this as just another way to grab adherents by the balls/ovaries and control them.

 

What does Bill Gothard know, anyhow? He's single, never married, and hates women.

 

Ugh!

 

*That term always made me laugh.

[2Honest]

Ah yes, the soul ties! I bought into that one as a young person, too. I remember my parents teaching me and my brother and sister about it. They really believed that stuff and their intentions were good. They didn't want us doing things that would hurt us. But all it did for me was cause a lot of guilt. shame and fear when it came to the area of sex. I carried those fears with me as a parent and was SO worried about our kids having sex before marriage. I was sure it would ruin them, they'd live with guilt about it and it would hurt their marriage once they found "the one".

 

But thankfully reason won out! I had a great conversation w/our daughter (17 y/o) the other day about sex. She's always agreed w/me in the past that waiting until marriage was the right thing, but she admitted that she only agreed for my benefit. She said she never intended to wait. She wanted to wait until she was older but not until marriage. We had a really frank conversation about it and had a good laugh at how uptight I used to be. It's so great not to be so freaked out about everything anymore!

 

If anyone is concerned about any lingering soul ties, here's 5 steps to get rid of them!

http://www.ministeringdeliverance.com/breaking_soul_ties.php

[norton65ca]

I've read about this in the past. slightly different perspective though...It begins with a glance between two people of the opposite sex or so the theory goes, and the second glance establishes the first tenuous thread, conversation builds more threads... As long as it stays that way, the tearing of these first tenuous threads is painless and of little consequence, however the longer one hangs out and the more intimate the connections, the more robust the threads become and the more pain and hurt is involved in the separation...Sex is the final link which of course is designed never to be broken in this theological mystery, and so the breaking of that spiritual thread creates great pain and so is to be avoided at all costs because the resulting spiritual scar tissue never heals, according to this doctrine.

Along with the above is the spiritual ties to past partners which have to be consciously renounced and removed by prayer as the above posters have noted. The whole thing is built on the foundation of treating one's sexuality and relationships with guilt and shame, and reinforcing the sin consciousness. It all becomes so onerous and sucks all the joy out of life.

I remember getting those rather elaborate tracts from the Last Days Ministries (The Keith & Melody Green group) and there was one in there by I think Charles Finney, about "true repentance". I read the thing, in a nutshell Rev. Finney was suggesting if one wanted to get really serious, one should go back through one's life and start repenting one's sins individually, going through one's memories and praying over each infraction....

You can imagine my gobsmacked incredulity at the enormity of this task, and the impossibility of it. A crushing ruthless doctrine.

[midniterider]

Holy shit, Christianity has gotten way more kinky and voyeuristic than when I was in. What the fuck business is it of theirs? This is just hugely disturbing. Purity Balls, "courtship", "soul ties", McCarthyesque sex inquisitions... When did evangelicals become CollarMe.com?

 

They want to know what YOU have been up to because their sex life is boring. So make it scandalous!

[midniterider]

The odd thing for me was this was 11 or so years ago and I was and still am happily married. There was some other shit happening in my life I cannot remember what it was and out of the blue the pastor asked me how many GF's I had before my wife. Bear in mind, my pastor was my golf partner too so we got to spend a lot of time together and discussed a lot more than what most folk get to discuss with their pastor.

 

See they need to find a reason for shit things happening to good people as obviously gawd is not really around. They have to dig into your past and convince you you were a lousy rotten sinner and despite the whole baptism in water and arising a new man/woman, somehow they cannot leave the buried person buried. Of course baptism merely made you a wet sinner as you really have not really repented and that is why shot is still happening. It all makes perfect sense.

 

Fucking idiots. It really boils down to that they do not believe that jeebus died for ALL of your sins. If it were that simple, there would be no hold they could exercise over you.

 

Wet sinner. lol. Yes, not sure what the water baptism is all about if you have to later on be baptised in the holy spirit.

[ToonForever]

If anyone is concerned about any lingering soul ties, here's 5 steps to get rid of them! http://www.ministeringdeliverance.com/breaking_soul_ties.php

 

Ah, the ol' "In Jesus's name" - It's like a magic spell. You command something, or you state something - but it doesn't have any power until you say the magic words. "In Jesus's Name!" Kapow! Alakazam! That used to bother long before I'd given up my faith.

[London]

If anyone is concerned about any lingering soul ties, here's 5 steps to get rid of them! http://www.ministeri...g_soul_ties.php

 

Ah, the ol' "In Jesus's name" - It's like a magic spell. You command something, or you state something - but it doesn't have any power until you say the magic words. "In Jesus's Name!" Kapow! Alakazam! That used to bother long before I'd given up my faith.

 

I know this from Catholic High School. But at the time it had nothing to do with sex.

 

As usual xianity is using witchcraft to make people believe. How ironic. That's what I thought in high school and it hasn't changed. They stole the concept from pagan religions.

 

And like Akheia mentions, it sounds like BDSM. How freudian of the fundies.

[LivingLife]

Wet sinner. lol. Yes, not sure what the water baptism is all about if you have to later on be baptised in the holy spirit.

 

Wet sinner was their way of saying "... but wait there's more..." OR "you really did not repent"

 

Taking it literally, the acceptance of jeebus, baptism BY IMMERSION ONLY should be it. And of course then comes the baptism of the wholly spook, then gifts then works then then then.

 

So why did you have to accept jeebus in the first place when all these extras (at no cost) are required. For me when I was baptised, I took the old man being no more verbatim and really did not understand this repentance2.0 shit.

 

Your sex life and thought life is all that they have to manipulate and work with, the fun stuff in life.

[Zephie]

Holy shit, Christianity has gotten way more kinky and voyeuristic than when I was in. What the fuck business is it of theirs? This is just hugely disturbing. Purity Balls, "courtship", "soul ties", McCarthyesque sex inquisitions... When did evangelicals become CollarMe.com?

 

LMFAO! Apparently it happened in the late 90's. There was this whole purity movement and what not. Collars are fun however with the right person....

So there's this conversation in Rants and Replies about Evangelism being better than social networking and sex. What I was wondering is if anyone has ever had to repent of each person they've ever slept with and break "soul ties" with that person. If you're unaware of what that is...basically I soul tie is formed through close friendships and many times through sex-according to some Christians. I remember doing this several times. Has anyone else ever had to do this?

So do they cut both "spiritual" and social ties with these people? Like telling your old friends that you can't hang out with them anymore because they'll drag you down into sin? An old friend of mine stopped hanging with me, because I wasn't a true Christian. I wonder if soul tie breaking had something to do with that.

 

I did both. It cost me alot. I've got to build up new relationships now and while that is exciting I do miss my old friends.

[Zephie]

I think this stems from Bill Gothard type fundy thinking. Gothard's group is very intent on each young person, prior to dating (which is exclusively for marriage minded people), being pure and 'undefiled' and not 'defrauded' in any way relationally or sexually. If they have a past of any kind, they need to pray special prayers to break soul ties with the people they were involved with (ranging from kissing and heavy petting* to sex).

 

Personally, I've come to view this as just another way to grab adherents by the balls/ovaries and control them.

 

What does Bill Gothard know, anyhow? He's single, never married, and hates women.

 

Ugh!

 

*That term always made me laugh.

I heard his name mentioned in a Living after Faith podcast. I think it was about the Quiverful movement *shiver* Seriously, how dare someone counsel others on something he has not experienced. That's bass-ackwards and just wrong.

Ah yes, the soul ties! I bought into that one as a young person, too. I remember my parents teaching me and my brother and sister about it. They really believed that stuff and their intentions were good. They didn't want us doing things that would hurt us. But all it did for me was cause a lot of guilt. shame and fear when it came to the area of sex. I carried those fears with me as a parent and was SO worried about our kids having sex before marriage. I was sure it would ruin them, they'd live with guilt about it and it would hurt their marriage once they found "the one".

 

But thankfully reason won out! I had a great conversation w/our daughter (17 y/o) the other day about sex. She's always agreed w/me in the past that waiting until marriage was the right thing, but she admitted that she only agreed for my benefit. She said she never intended to wait. She wanted to wait until she was older but not until marriage. We had a really frank conversation about it and had a good laugh at how uptight I used to be. It's so great not to be so freaked out about everything anymore!

 

If anyone is concerned about any lingering soul ties, here's 5 steps to get rid of them!

http://www.ministeri...g_soul_ties.php

I had full intentions to wait. Really I did...however...I also thought that I would be married by 22 at the latest. I'm 29 now and just moved in with my boyfriend. I waited until I was 26 almost 27 before doing the deed. No regrets and if that "christian" mindset starts creeping in then I just keep telling myself no regrets. I've visited that site too. If I'm not mistaken it also tells the person to get rid of things they were given. So many good gifts I got rid of because of that shit.

I've read about this in the past. slightly different perspective though...It begins with a glance between two people of the opposite sex or so the theory goes, and the second glance establishes the first tenuous thread, conversation builds more threads... As long as it stays that way, the tearing of these first tenuous threads is painless and of little consequence, however the longer one hangs out and the more intimate the connections, the more robust the threads become and the more pain and hurt is involved in the separation...Sex is the final link which of course is designed never to be broken in this theological mystery, and so the breaking of that spiritual thread creates great pain and so is to be avoided at all costs because the resulting spiritual scar tissue never heals, according to this doctrine.

Along with the above is the spiritual ties to past partners which have to be consciously renounced and removed by prayer as the above posters have noted. The whole thing is built on the foundation of treating one's sexuality and relationships with guilt and shame, and reinforcing the sin consciousness. It all becomes so onerous and sucks all the joy out of life.

I remember getting those rather elaborate tracts from the Last Days Ministries (The Keith & Melody Green group) and there was one in there by I think Charles Finney, about "true repentance". I read the thing, in a nutshell Rev. Finney was suggesting if one wanted to get really serious, one should go back through one's life and start repenting one's sins individually, going through one's memories and praying over each infraction....

You can imagine my gobsmacked incredulity at the enormity of this task, and the impossibility of it. A crushing ruthless doctrine.

 

Pretty much it!

[Akheia]

The church goes through phases of fears, I perceive. Right now it isn't hard to see what Christians are most frightened of, what they view as the greatest threat to the faith. I view their ruthless attempt at the suppression of free sexual expression as the single biggest indicator that the Emperor they worship has no clothes. Also a teeny tiny peen. Yeah, I went there. I've had enough awful sex with religious guys to know how scared shitless they are of anything related to it. They're not jealous. Well, some might be. But mostly fundie men seemed more terrified of every aspect of sex than jealous of people having great sex.

 

It's disgusting to see this huge push for adult women to be as asexual and childlike as possible before marriage. It says nothing good about men that they are defining a woman's worth solely by her ability to refrain from that activity that is one of the purest expressions of her female nature. It says nothing good about a religion that is trying this hard to bottle up female sexuality and contain it through rigid gender roles and chattel ownership. I'm so utterly disgusted that this is the modern evangelical church. But I'm hopeful that the more obvious they are in their misguided crusade, the more people will wake up to this abuse. Maybe one day there just won't be any women to marry who'll put up with this shit and the men will slink off to the Men's Rights Activism sites where their views rightly belong.

 

You've come a long way (backward), baby.