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Goodbye Jesus

Why Do Christians Want To Go To Heaven?


rach

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Another reason to go to heaven would be to meet interesting people. 

 

I bet the people in Hell are far more interesting.

 

 

I bet they are having a lot more sex.

 

 

I wonder what sex is like while you're on fire. That sounds pretty kinky. O.o

 

do you smoke after sex would be a dumb question

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Agnostic?? I thought you believed in the great spirit creator.

 

I'm agnostic about Christianity and all formal religions.  I believe in the probability of the great spirit creator with relative certainty.

 

 

Has anybody ever read Heaven by Randy Acorn or Heaven is for Real by that little boy?

I've read both of those. As a Christian I loved that book by randy alcorn. It fueled many grandiose ideas I had about how great heaven would be. I was always very excited about heaven. Then I thought about what he was writing and how it had nothing biblical to back it up. He pretty much just says, well god is love so of course he wants his children to have anything they want! Pets in heaven? Sure! Mansions? You betcha! Sports? Duh! While I realized there was nothing biblical to what he was saying, I still think an eternity with endless possibilities would be a blast and letting go of my afterlife hopes and dreams was the hardest part of my deconversion.

 

Some of my afterlife plans...

-Animals and my pets would have increased intelligence and could communicate in some way, maybe telepathically. That would be cool. We would go on all sorts of adventures together.

-The ability to "live" the life of any character in a book, tv show, video game or movie, thru like a virtual reality sort of thing.

-owning my own planet to decorate and do whatever I want with. Create my own little animal friends to live there.

-hearing the stories of angels and everyone else who has ever lived. Watching through their memories on a movie screen or even experiencing it from their point of view.

-going on adventures using new abilities such as flying and breathing under water.

-making new friends with people who have lived before me

-giant mushrooms. I want a house on top of a giant purple spotted mushroom with an elevator in the stem.

-changing my hair and eye color at will to whatever I want it to be with just a thought.

-learning all the secrets of the universe by having the time and capacity to study everything. Designing experiments and inventions.

 

I think I could easily stay busy for thousands of years with those sorts of possibilities. If I got bored, I could just re-set my memory to experience and discover everything all over again with fresh eyes! But I realize there was never anything biblical about my thoughts. And yes, I do read too many books and play too many video games...

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Well considering what we know about Job (god enjoys giving nice things and then sadistically ripping them away for no reason other than to make a point), and the Noah flood (god creates the world and calls it "good."  Later on he changes his mind, regrets making it, and destroys it.).  So this is the god Christians are trusting to provide them with eternal happiness.  A god who gives good things one day and tears them away the next.  A god who can't decide whether he likes what he created or would rather terminate it and start over. 

 

If it sounds too good to be true.....

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I want to go to heaven because I was told to want to go to heaven.

 

I'm sure you were.  Religious indoctrination has done you well.

 

 

Have to follow the orders of the authorities.

 

Says you.

 

Why do you have to follow the orders of the authorities?

 

 

Because might = right. I thought everyone knew that...

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The carrot offered to believers is never literally described; language can only hint at the indescribable peace and contentment that awaits the faithful. To some it's very roughly represented by 72 virgins, though that's not part of the Koran, and to others gold represents great abundance and contentment. Heaven = goodness and reward; Hell = evil and punishment. That's all we can really deduce from the texts.

 

I think everyone in heaven masturbates. It's allowed there.

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Guest chrisassaf

Well, because heaven is a whole lot better than working at f____ing Wal-mart listening to some pig-lady yabber on about company policies (yawn) all the while stocking shelves and listening to smelly old ladies argue about fabric sizes while Boston's "More than a Feeling" blare on the speakers for the 60th time that day.

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Well, because heaven is a whole lot better than working at f____ing Wal-mart listening to some pig-lady yabber on about company policies (yawn) all the while stocking shelves and listening to smelly old ladies argue about fabric sizes while Boston's "More than a Feeling" blare on the speakers for the 60th time that day.

 

I say it is worse.  Prove me wrong.

 

Oh listening to a song sixty times before your shift ends is almost unbearable.  Well how is it going to feel after praising Jesus sixty billion times (60,000,000,000) only to turn around and do it again another sixty billion and another and another because the shift never ends and you never get to quit?

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I heard a comedian on the radio this morning who said, "It's really ironic but my version of Hell would be to spend an eternity with Christians."

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I heard a comedian on the radio this morning who said, "It's really ironic but my version of Hell would be to spend an eternity with Christians."

 

Or worse, imagine being stuck with them and their god forever. That's almost as terrible as the hell with all of the flames!

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It baffles me that Christians in the US are always trying to gain power and run things. Aren't they going to heaven? Aren't they going to live in paradise for eternity? Isn't that enough? Why can't they just be happy that they are going to heaven? They are like the rich man in Nathan's rebuke to David who steals the poor man's sheep. Heaven's not enough for them, they want everything.

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It baffles me that Christians in the US are always trying to gain power and run things. Aren't they going to heaven? Aren't they going to live in paradise for eternity? Isn't that enough? Why can't they just be happy that they are going to heaven? They are like the rich man in Nathan's rebuke to David who steals the poor man's sheep. Heaven's not enough for them, they want everything.

 

Right. Didn't their master say that the meek will inherit the Earth? So, the pathway to running things would be meekness, wouldn't it?

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@chrisassaf aka authentic Christian believer, who refers to a woman as a "pig lady".....so you are on your way to heaven huh?  I guess I'd rather be dead than live in a Christian community eternally. 

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Why do christians want to go to heaven?

 

 

 

To be with fellow numbnuts (so they won't realize how stupid they've been).*

 

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

*I'm feeling particularly anti-christian today.  The season is the reason.  ETA:  and people like chrisassaf, toobis,  maddox, jordanriver, and their ilk.  GONZ9729CustomImage1539775.gif

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Guest chrisassaf

Christians want to go to heaven so they can be with their loved ones! The bible also states that people will be talking about their old lives in heaven. Sounds interesting.

 

Also, some of my fans don't want to miss out on spending eternity WITH ME!!!!!

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Christians want to go to heaven so they can be with their loved ones! The bible also states that people will be talking about their old lives in heaven. Sounds interesting.

 

Also, some of my fans don't want to miss out on spending eternity WITH ME!!!!!

you have fans? What's that cost ya

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Christians want to go to heaven so they can be with their loved ones! The bible also states that people will be talking about their old lives in heaven. Sounds interesting.

 

Also, some of my fans don't want to miss out on spending eternity WITH ME!!!!!

@ chrisassaf....ok, now who is going to want to go to heaven with you if you go around calling people pigs?  Why don't you start with "do unto others, as you would have them do unto you" before you start fantasizing about a future in heaven?  How are all you Christians going to be happy up there, you treat everyone so poorly, you'll all just kill each other. 

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I want to go to heaven because I was told to want to go to heaven.

Finally, you admit it!

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I want to go to heaven because I was told to want to go to heaven.

Do you always do what you are told?

YES!!!!!!!!! In my ideal state, that is what would happen, even at the expense of families.

And if I told you to take your child-abuse-justifying ass to another website and never come back here, would you do it?

Chrisassaf justifies child abuse?

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Also, some of my fans don't want to miss out on spending eternity WITH ME!!!!!

Oh, we will be just fine in hell then, I assure you.

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Guest chrisassaf

I wonder what someone like Toobis or Maddox would say about heaven being boring or not? Their word is the final word on subjects like this.

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I think, for me, it's the fact that I want to be one of the chosen ones. One of those who has loyalty to a person, being or cause. The loved ones idea is probably secondary to that.

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I wonder what someone like Toobis or Maddox would say about heaven being boring or not? Their word is the final word on subjects like this.

 

 

Now that you mention it, did Toobis ever go to prison for his domestic abuse or his terrorist threats?  We didn't get to hear the rest of the story.

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I think, for me, it's the fact that I want to be one of the chosen ones. One of those who has loyalty to a person, being or cause. The loved ones idea is probably secondary to that.

You want to go to heaven so you can feel special?

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I want to go to heaven because I was told to want to go to heaven.

Do you always do what you are told?

YES!!!!!!!!! In my ideal state, that is what would happen, even at the expense of families.

And if I told you to take your child-abuse-justifying ass to another website and never come back here, would you do it?

Chrisassaf justifies child abuse?

 

Read the thread "Honor Your Father and Mother."  It was started about two weeks ago.

 

Here's the link: http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/59656-honor-your-father-and-mother/

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Also, some of my fans don't want to miss out on spending eternity WITH ME!!!!!

Oh, we will be just fine in hell then, I assure you.

 

*bangs on the gates of hell*  "Let me in!  Please, let me in!"  An eternity with you chrisassaf, oh godWendybanghead.gif

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