BendyLine Posted April 9, 2014 Share Posted April 9, 2014 A group of former Christians I'm involved with had this discussion recently, and it led to some fun conversation.For me... well, when I was about 14 years old I was with a group of older teens who were kind of new to Christianity. One of them said, "Man, it's hard to avoid having sex before marriage, isn't it?" I replied, "No, not really." Those words have haunted me since, because I didn't lose my virginity until I was in my early 20's (and that was a big part of my deconversion). Sadly, most of my regrets and embarrassing memories are from when I was a Christian. >< 5 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted April 9, 2014 Share Posted April 9, 2014 -I wouldn't make friends with people if they didn't go to the right kind of church. When I met people they were just somebody I knew. I felt like I wasn't authorized to be their friend unless they were "real" Christians. -When I did nice things for people it was so that I could be a good witness. I didn't do much preaching because I was shy. But I was very strategic about how an action might make Christians look good or bad so I was alway planing my Christian witness. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milesaway Posted April 9, 2014 Share Posted April 9, 2014 Let's see. I kept the worst of the douchey xtian statements to myself, but I did start to act all holier-than-thou towards others there for a bit. And I said some pretty nasty things about other xtian religions and the whole virginity thing too. I also provided some encouragement to someone at the xtian forum I used to post at who was also joining the church but thinking of backing out. It was right before my faith completely vanished. To this day, I feel horrible that I helped encourage someone to duke it out with the indoctrination. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest afireinside Posted April 9, 2014 Share Posted April 9, 2014 Where to start... I got into debates with non-believers about the existence of God and all the other trimmings that go with that one. That reminds me I do need to admit to them I was wrong next chance I get. I wrote a lot of emails to people I'd upset or let down in my wild youth. The letters had threads of scripture and references to Jesus etc. I am embarrassed to bump into these people these days. That was just ugly I refused to continue having sex with my girlfriend because I had found God. That eventually killed our relationship as she thought I was crazy- I was! Pressuring my little brother for 5 years to believe. Only the past year we've actually started hanging out again. I was so holier-than-thou to him when he needed me as a friend I was trying to be an evangelist! Many more, almost an endless list. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest afireinside Posted April 9, 2014 Share Posted April 9, 2014 Actually this is how best to illustrate my Christian life... Timeline.... 2005-(douche bag Christian)-2013 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlindersRemoved Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 Sending my kid to Christian private school for 5 years. As a teenager I could tell he was turning away from god, so I drug him to church on Sundays and constantly berated his choice of music. Fortunately, we have a great relationship now and enjoy going to concerts and listening to devil music together. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deidre Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 I was a bit prude-ish with guys. I probably missed out on some opportunties. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 I told my loving mother that she was going to hell if she didn't get saved, repeatedly. We had several fights over religion. I also wrote evangelistic letters to my immediate family members, which really embarrasses me now. I was a really hardcore believer for years. Now I am FREE! Glory! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest afireinside Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 I told my loving mother that she was going to hell if she didn't get saved, repeatedly. We had several fights over religion. I also wrote evangelistic letters to my immediate family members, which really embarrasses me now. I was a really hardcore believer for years. Now I am FREE! Glory! Jeff I did the same thing. My grandfather was dying so I wrote him a letter thanking him for all the good things he had done for me but I also went on about Jesus in it. He was a full on atheist and always called religion for what it was, he never judged me about it but I'd love it if he was alive still so I could tell him what I've learnt- he'd be proud as!. Reminds me of that song "in the living years" lol. I'd like to hi-5 my grandfather right now 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Llwellyn Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 When I was in First Grade overseas, there was a really cute red-headed girl in my class. She and her family were Baha'i, and her mother one day came to our class to tell us about the religion and give us coloring-books featuring the various Baha'i temples. So, of course, I told my classmate that she and her family were going to hell because they were not Christians. She was sad and cried, and later that week her mother and her stopped me in the hallway and told me what I said was not nice. Of course, I smugly knew that I was right, the truth hurt, and they were all going to hell. When I Google-search my friend now, I see that she is a yoga-instructor in a yuppie US city. I would love to write her a message and let her know that it was me that went to hell... but that I have now come out on the other side. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 I told my loving mother that she was going to hell if she didn't get saved, repeatedly. We had several fights over religion. I also wrote evangelistic letters to my immediate family members, which really embarrasses me now. I was a really hardcore believer for years. Now I am FREE! Glory! That's about what happened to me too. I was such a pain in the ass to my family. Makes me cringe even today. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
DarwinAdmirer Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 There are two things I feel ashamed about: 1. Looking down on a colleague of mine, because he had 'lost his faith' and trying to convince him to return to christianity. Fun part: he's the first one I turned when I was starting to think christianity didn't make sense at all. 2. Being so self-righteous about knowing 'the way, the truth and the life' and ignoring all the hints that there might not be a god... Like many have said before me, I should really apologize to some people... 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Roz Posted April 10, 2014 Share Posted April 10, 2014 There were so many things I did, it would be easier for me to list the few un-douche-y things I've done while still a fundie. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilith666 Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 I told my loving mother that she was going to hell if she didn't get saved, repeatedly. We had several fights over religion. I also wrote evangelistic letters to my immediate family members, which really embarrasses me now. I was a really hardcore believer for years. Now I am FREE! Glory! That's about what happened to me too. I was such a pain in the ass to my family. Makes me cringe even today. Hey Akheia! Good to see you back. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Pantophobia Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 I was usually too scared to be smug, but I had a doozy of which I am still ashamed. When I was at my Christian high school, a friend brought as a guest a family friend who was a gay man, probably in his 20s. When we asked if we could question him, he generously said sure. After entertaining several ridiculously naive questions and preaching about his sinful ways, I self-righteously asked him if he wasn't worried that his asshole was going to get all stretched out and why he didn't just stop with his sinful gay behavior. It's worth arguing that I was a very stupid 15 year old with an extremely limited world view at the time, but what a horrible thing to ask another person! The irony is that, five years later, not only had I made several friends who were gay and learned that no, it was not a "choice," but that I became a passionate and staunch gay rights advocate. The adult I am today has a hard time believing that the stupid 15 year old I was ever existed. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 I was usually too scared to be smug, but I had a doozy of which I am still ashamed. When I was at my Christian high school, a friend brought as a guest a family friend who was a gay man, probably in his 20s. When we asked if we could question him, he generously said sure. After entertaining several ridiculously naive questions and preaching about his sinful ways, I self-righteously asked him if he wasn't worried that his asshole was going to get all stretched out and why he didn't just stop with his sinful gay behavior. It's worth arguing that I was a very stupid 15 year old with an extremely limited world view at the time, but what a horrible thing to ask another person! The irony is that, five years later, not only had I made several friends who were gay and learned that no, it was not a "choice," but that I became a passionate and staunch gay rights advocate. The adult I am today has a hard time believing that the stupid 15 year old I was ever existed. Yeah, I was taught to hate gays in church too. Now I strongly support gay rights and gay marriage. Back years ago, I knew a few gay Christians, and I couldn't understand how they could be gay and Christian at the same time, given what the Bible says about homosexuality. Now I am much more mature and educated! Glory! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LukeExChristian Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 i did not call anyone in my elementary school or high school "friends" accept, 4 maybe, who were Christians. other than that, i was sure that i was not too affiliated with anyone who wasn't 'saved'. the bible is not very clear on concept like: how to socialize with others, how to interact with girls, what to do with spare time or on a weekend, or how to deal with stress. so... i did simply did not concern myself with these things. i avoided people, i shoved thoughts about girls out of my mind, and i just stayed at home and played video games where so my spirituality (and virginity) was not threatened. I did not analyze my problems (big and small) beyond what the bible says. i never had a chance to be a d-bag to nonchristians (thankfully) because i was at home too much. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdog Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 I was a pain in the rear to my sons and husband. Man I cringe at how preachy and christiany I got. I also sent letters of my news but always threw in there evangelical crap and tracts to family members who live far away. Ugh. Awful to even think of. I was very judgy of other religions and beliefs. Other Christian denominations. Judgy of celebrities, musicians. People in the media. Thought and said they were all going to hell. I feel really badly about this elderly gentleman who was a new friend to me and my husband. He was a widow for several years and he finally met a woman again who he wanted to marry and she moved in with him. I told him it was wrong of them to "shack up" before marriage and other such nonsense. Lol This guy was 70. What a fuckin idiot I was. Looking back on that I think wtf was I thinking. He actually stopped talking to me. I don't blame him. I did apologize to those I have been able to. Family and friends. The elderly gentleman we lost touch so I was never able to apologize for my ridiculous comments and attitude. Everyone else I was able to say sorry to are thankful that I'm no longer like that and have been forgiving about how I was. Things are good now. I am glad I'm out of it. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Akheia Posted April 11, 2014 Share Posted April 11, 2014 I wish every fundie alive could read this thread. It's shocking to me now that I actually thought that the best way to "love" people was to terrorize them with threats of Hell and entreaties to become just as oppressed and steamrolled as I was. I meant that word, shocking. It is simply breathtaking to imagine how wrong I was about how to treat people. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
violetbutterfly Posted April 12, 2014 Share Posted April 12, 2014 I had a smug sense of self-righteousness and thought I was better than most people because I believed. I thought atheists were evil and scary. I was totally prude and passed up love for religion. I thought being gay was a choice and I felt disappointed in my gay friend, and I think he knew it. I need to give him a call one of these days and catch up. He wouldn't recognize me now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted April 12, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted April 12, 2014 What Were The Most Douchebag-Y Things You Did As A Christian? Wasn't being a christian douchebaggy enough? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ApostateAwoken Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 Where to start... People said I was a bit self-righteous, so I must have given off a general douche vibe when I got in religious mode. I didn't support gay rights. I was condescending, although mostly in my head. In elementary school, I didn't want my friends to go to hell, so I'd tell them about Jesus and eternal damnation and all that crap. I don't think it ever worked. I hope not. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 When I was a teenager, it was fashionable to wear lots of badges to school. I wore a Jesus fish, and a little gold pair of feet, which was scaled to 3mm, the estimated size of fetus feet at 12 weeks gestation, which was the upper time limit for pregnancy termination in NZ. I was happy to explain this to anyone who asked what the feet symbolised. So ashamed now. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ousian Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 I was only a Christian until I was 18 (last year), so I didn't do much externally. I did, however, constantly judge non-Christians. Even Christians of other denominations were subject to ridicule in my church. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparklingphoenix Posted April 16, 2014 Share Posted April 16, 2014 I've been seeing this thread for a while, but couldn't think of any thing douchebaggy. For a while though, I've been feeling really bad about something that happened at my previous school. I don't know why I didn't make the connection till now.... One of my friends is openly gay, and it never bothered me. The only problem was when he wanted my support, I couldn't give it to him because of stupid christianity. I was really confused on the matter and I told him I had no problem with him, but as I was taught, being gay is a sin... I didn't really know what to do about it, and I know he was disappointed. I really want to tell him I deconverted and that I completely support him, but we don't talk that much anymore since I transferred to a new school and I don't know if that would be weird to randomly message him about that. So, yeah... I really regret that, and I wish I wasn't so... brainwashed Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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