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Goodbye Jesus

My Story Part 2


Scottsman

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Part 1 is here

http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/58491-my-life-and-conversion-to-atheism/#entry889231

 

 

This is part 2 of my story.

 

 

My original intent was to be moved out in November of last year from my parents home. Life happened and I wasnt able to. Until now.

 

I can proudly say that as of a week ago I am living on my own. I rented a nice little apartment. I furnished it with everything I need. Everything seems so surreal right now. I wake up look around and think "I can do whatever I want."

 

I don't even know what to do with my life. What do non religious people do in their free time? My next dilemma is this. My parents don't know. I attended church twice this past sunday because I wasnt completely moved out yet.

 

I am considering attending church just once a sunday rather than twice. If only to maintain a family relationship. I registered for a rec sports league that runs during second service. It starts in 3 weeks. I will have to skip church to attent. I am considering telling my parents I am looking at other churches in the afternoon and then after 2 months just say I am attending a different church. This will allow them the choice to live in blissful ignorance or call me out and attend the new church as well to see if im actually going. Is that a good idea or just come out to them? I figure this way I can maintain the relationship.

 

My life right now is so weird. For the first time in my life I can be me. I get to discover who I truly am.

 

Also for the first time in my life dating seems like an actual possibility. I no longer have any excuses to give myself. I have to get out there. Scares the crap out of me.

 

So what will it be. Tell the parents and possibly ruin the relationship forever? Or give them the opportunity to live in blissful ignorance and not question everything I do?

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  • Super Moderator

Good for you! You've accomplished a huge goal. 

 

Personally, for the time being, I'd enjoy my peace and freedom and not bother to "come out" to the parents just yet....unless they start pestering/preaching at you.  

 

Your gradual approach via the rec sports league and then saying you're looking for a new church sounds reasonable.  If it were me, and parents asked about the new church search, I'd say "I'm still looking."  (and looking and looking and looking.)  Of course, I'd never find one. Nor would I tell them I had because as you speculate - that might lead to them checking up and calling you out on it.  I imagine that would cause quite a shitstorm.  

 

Maybe right now is the time to be a bit evasive. IMO, it's best if you don't tell an outright lie.  But you also don't want to live a lie. So enjoy life, gather your strength, hope for the best, and prepare for the worst.  And always have a back-up plan.    

 

Ultimately you want to be your true self and live your life genuinely.

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  • Super Moderator

I'd suggest a slow approach.  There's no need to drop a bombshell on your family.  Subtle hints along the way, suggestions of doubts--and give them time to adjust to each before presenting the next.  The only dating advice I can give is to be safe, not just physically, but emotionally as well.

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Good for you.  Enjoy your new found freedom.

 

I would take things slowly with telling your parents.  There's no rush.  It is actually none of their business.  If after telling them, the relationship suffers, that is their responsibility, not yours.  Hope for the best but prepare for the worst, I always say.

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Take your time both in terms of what you tell your parents and deciding on what interests you sufficiently to fill the gap.  Think laterally.  For example, like travel?  Then learn a language.  Want to meet people?  Then what sort of societies can you find in the neighbourhood involved in things you may like?

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Congrats to you! Getting your own space is key!

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