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Goodbye Jesus

Beautiful Example Of How Toxic Christianity Can Be


violetbutterfly

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Sometimes when I come across an article on relationships or dating that seems amusing, I'll click on it. I saw a link for "Why Marriage is So Hard" and I clicked on it, thinking maybe it was going to be something funny.

 

Instead I found this. A whole lot of validation for leaving the incredibly vile and toxic belief system that is Christianity.

 

Why Marriage is So Hard

 

Some of my favorite parts:

 

 

 

The reason marriage is so hard is because you’re more sinful than you think you are.

 

You don’t yet grasp the depths of your own depravity.


 

You are not yet what you ought to be and so God has been gracious to place you in this very relationship, because He means to sanctify you and bring you to repentance. This relationship is hard because it’s life and death.  What you do here means everything.  And you can grumble about the myriad of things that are wrong in this union or you can start to see it how God sees it—as a sacred picture of what He is doing to redeem the world.  Christ is the bridegroom and we are the bride.  And we will finally be lovely because He has so loved us, not the other way around.

 

God knew what He was doing when He gave you this particular person.  He knew the flaws in your character and personality that this person could sharpen.  He knew that this person could expose the sins you try to cover and hide.  

 

He knows better than you what you need and the sooner you submit to Christ and His purposes in your life, the sooner you will see what He is up to in your marriage.  This relationship is not for your happiness, it is for your redemption.  He is not trying to make you comfortable. He is desperate to make you holy.

 

He will go to any lengths to transform you because He loves you so much.

 

Most merciful God, we confess that we are by nature sinful and unclean.  We have sinned against you in thought, word, and deed, by what we have done and by what we have left undone.  We have not loved you with our whole heart and we have not loved our neighbors as ourselves.

 

 

 

So abusive. So awful. sad.png

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     I think I'd rather live in a non-shitty relationship and then maybe go dunk myself in water or kill a goat every so often or do whatever the magic trick of the day is in order to make myself holy.

 

     If holiness isn't about comfort then god must be the most uncomfortable thing there is.  That explains the attitude.  Heaven must truly be hell.

 

          mwc

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Silly woman. Silly god stuff. This article is about ordinary neglect that comes with every relationship in the world.

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If people are so dense and depraved, why should we listen to this dense and depraved person's thoughts on marriage?  He has surely misunderstood Christ, God, marriage, and all the rest...

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

That's just your low self-esteem talking.

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

Don't you have a whole thread of questions needing answers? Here's a convenient link for you: http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/64259-ironhorse-not-answered-your-questions-put-them-here-for-all-to-see/

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

You're not getting it. That mentality is the problem. WHY is it that you believe that you are so sinful and in need of sanctification? Because the church/bible/god/jesus/etc told you you are. It convinces you that you're a worthless piece of shit that's only salvageable because Jesus died for you. It's a perfect example of battered wife syndrome. The quotes that the OP bolded point out the problem perfectly. Christianity convinces you that you're worthless without God, which makes you totally dependent on God, which keeps you enmeshed in the whole cycle of sin/repentence/santification/etc.

 

It's not until you can see the cycle for what it is that you can begin to break free. If/when you're ready to do that, we're here to support you.

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Let's have a vote!

 

 

Which post made you throw up in your mouth more, the OP or post #5 (ironhorse's reply)?

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

 

IMO, a system which focuses on the depths of human depravity calls into question the value of the human dispensing the advice.  Would not his advice be tainted by depravity as well?  

 

This would regard the person who wrote the article on marriage and your advice as well.  How does your own "toxic" nature affect your ability to apprehend the Christian faith correctly?  Your version of the Christian faith is not independent from you-- you have picked out the one you thought best, developed it in certain ways, and are now passing it along.  How have you distorted it?  How do you know, with your depraved and toxic soul, that you have not chosen the wrong religion to begin with?

 

For instance, the view that you have articulated on justification is deemed to be a heresy by church fathers, the Roman Catholic Church, the Eastern Orthodox Church, the Oriental Orthodox Churches, the Assyrian Churches of the East, the Church of Christ, and others.  

 

Since you have admitted to your own toxic soul, should this verse from 2 Pet 3:16 not apply to your advice? "There are some things in them [Paul's letters] hard to understand, which the ignorant and unstable twist to their own destruction, as they do the other scriptures."

 

I'm not trying to claim I'm a better person than you are.  I have daily struggles like everyone.  What I'm saying that the types of Christianity that go on about human depravity seem to be self-refuting to me.  If we are so depraved and there are so many thousands of Christian options, we should expect that our metaphysical, theological, and non-verifiable opinions on such matters are highly suspect.  With Christianity being just one collection of religious systems among many thousands, we should expect that we would be wrong about such things.

.

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Classic guilt tripping.

 

Women stay in abusive or bad relationships for many reasons,

But for christian women, theres a whole other layer,

God wants you to, you sin if you leave...

And fear, not the normal fear of , how will I make ends meet, look after the children etc,

But fear of displeasing god, fear of. damnation..

 

Its is one of the reasons i am no longer a christian

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God doesn't overlook what you've done.  He sees it all.

-the christian blog

 

This was the ultimate control device for me and my friends growing up.  'jeshit sees all your wrong doings!'  'do you want to disappoint jeshit?'  'he dies every time you sin!'

I have to say it's the perfect tool to control little kids.  Will it mess up their childhood and possibly their entire lives?  Sure.  But hey, at least they're doing exactly as you told them now!

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Browbeating Christianity. It keeps them coming back each week and filling the buckets for their "depraved" acts.

 

Christianity makes people feel like utter failures. You need Jesus do to do anything. Alone, your works are as filthy rags. You can't do good you horrible human!

 

Fuck that shit!

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But depravity is the FUN part of marriage!

 

Oh come on, if your marriage is THAT hard or you're being abused, get divorced.  Most of my first marriage was actually pretty pleasant most of the time and when it got unbearable I quit, and my second marriage is enjoyable.  No, not perfect, but so what?  We're two separate people, we bicker sometimes, then we laugh about it, we can both laugh at ourselves which helps, and sometimes we just close our eyes to the others' stupidity.  So what?  Neither of us is perfect, but who wants to be perfect?  I know when it comes to the big stuff, my husband has my back, and that's what's important.

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But depravity is the FUN part of marriage!

Oh I'm willing to bet this is a HUGE matter of opinion that depends on the level of "depravity".

 

On several occasions while listening to christian radio, there have been abused women calling in (they were obviously in tears and mentally and emotionally fucked) asking the host what they should do about their marriages.

 

What answer did they get every single time?

 

Pray!

 

What god has joined together, let not man put asunder.

 

And everyone's favorite -- "As a woman, you must continue to submit to your husband in prayer and in the lord so that by your obedience to the lord, your husband may be redeemed."

 

These women got off the phone even more damaged than when they called in!

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I'd rewrite it as "You don't yet grasp your potential to bring happiness to yourself and others.  Keep trying, and encourage your partner to explore his or her potential.  Be there for each other, but mostly be there for yourself."

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

There is no such thing as sin. Christianity tells you you're sick and then they sell you the cure.

 

The holy spirit doesn't take over because there is no holy spirit. That little voice telling you something is wrong is your conscience. We all have it irrespective of our belief or lack thereof.

 

Seriously, isn't it time that you started answering some of our questions? This isn't going to go away. We're not going to forget that you refuse to answer them. I'm going to keep on reminding you every time that you post elsewhere.

 

Here you go: http://www.ex-christ...for-all-to-see/

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

Every now and again a Christian will say something that makes me feel ashamed to have ever believed such absurd self-deprecating moronic nonsense. The article in question is a perfect example. This post is another.

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

Every now and again a Christian will say something that makes me feel ashamed to have ever believed such absurd self-deprecating moronic nonsense. The article in question is a perfect example. This post is another.

 

 

I'm not ashamed.

 

May I suggest the 1999 film True Crime to help clarify my view?

It's not a popcorn and soda movie, more like a few cups of coffee and a Lucky Strike.

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

Every now and again a Christian will say something that makes me feel ashamed to have ever believed such absurd self-deprecating moronic nonsense. The article in question is a perfect example. This post is another.

 

 

I'm not ashamed.

 

May I suggest the 1999 film True Crime to help clarify my view?

It's not a popcorn and soda movie, more like a few cups of coffee and a Lucky Strike.

 

 

http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/64259-ironhorse-not-answered-your-questions-put-them-here-for-all-to-see/

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Every now and again a Christian will say something that makes me feel ashamed to have ever believed such absurd self-deprecating moronic nonsense. The article in question is a perfect example. This post is another.

 

 

I'm not ashamed.

 

May I suggest the 1999 film True Crime to help clarify my view?

It's not a popcorn and soda movie, more like a few cups of coffee and a Lucky Strike.

 

 

Seriously, isn't it time that you started answering some of our questions? This isn't going to go away. We're not going to forget that you refuse to answer them. I'm going to keep on reminding you every time that you post elsewhere.

 

Here you go: http://www.ex-christ...for-all-to-see/

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To me the article was a realistic statement.

 

The "toxic" message I got was not about the christian faith, but me.

 

I do wrong things daily (sin) and my wife could write you a long long list.

Marriage for us, at times, has been difficult. We are not perfect beings.

 

I am justified (made perfect in God's View) by my faith in Christ. It's all grace, not works.

 

Sanctification is the act or process of acquiring sanctity, of being made or becoming holy.

It is progressive in the life of each believer. Paul refers to this several times in his letters.

 

The Holy Spirit works within to aid and encourage the believer to do the right thing but the Holy Spirit does not take over and force.

 

Its progress (or lack of) is different in each believer for many reasons. 

 

Every now and again a Christian will say something that makes me feel ashamed to have ever believed such absurd self-deprecating moronic nonsense. The article in question is a perfect example. This post is another.

 

 

I'm not ashamed.

 

May I suggest the 1999 film True Crime to help clarify my view?

It's not a popcorn and soda movie, more like a few cups of coffee and a Lucky Strike.

 

 

At this point, I'd almost be surprised if you didn't recommend a movie or a song rather than actually address an issue.

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Well you SHOULD be ashamed, Ironhorse!

You say that it's all grace, not works.  If that's so, then where in your life is the visible proof that you are under God's grace?

.

.

.

Hint:

 

Go to Biblegateway.com and perform a keyword search for the word 'fruit'.

Restrict your search to the Gospels and set the display to give you 50 results per page.

You'll get 30 hits, 24 of which apply directly to you.

 

Then do the same search (fruit), restricting yourself to the Epistles.

You'll get 13 hits, 8 of which apply directly to you.

.

.

.

You've shown us the rotten fruit of faithlessness by breaking your promise to answer ALL the questions put to you.

"Produce fruit in keeping with repentance" Ironhorse (Matthew 3 : 8) and makes amends for your bad fruit by answering them.  By now you know where they are.

 

 

 

 

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This culd have been better written without the God and the damage done by the battered women syndrome they're talking about.

One could as easily say, "Let's not play at the 'who-has-it-harder' Olympics. Instead, let's appreciate what the other person does ..." and so forth. I've been that guy, the sole provider, and it isn't any fun. Not saying it's fun for the woman in that situation either. But it's far from 'power' at least for those of us grunts that are average types.

So much could have been communicated without the matrix, and so much more good done without the incessant need to support the meme. As a Xian I felt guilty for so many things which are non-issues. One of them being: I never really saw my marriage as this reflection, like they say. I just wanted to be good to Her, to love Her, help and support Her. And yes, I was, and am, and forever will be, flawed. I'm no more and no less flawed without the god. Only the non-issues are just not in the way anymore.

The meme, the religious matrix, takes so much effort and fuel and energy to support. That post doesn't give life to relationships, it points out filth and nastiness only. And creates filth and nastiness where there isn't any.

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Yet another reason I'm glad to be out of that mindfuck, and even more so that I never married into that shit. It always worried me about those who ended up in abusive relationships within the xtian setting, it's like a double whammy, and my heart ached for them. 

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