RealityCheck Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 On September the 6th I celebrated 2 years of being Jesus free. I can't quite articulate how much my life has been altered in all it's detail. I've had to learn life lessons that weren't possible inside the confines of my religion. I've come out as an individual with far more mental clarity. I've discovered confidence and learned to take the initiative. Most importantly, I finally got professional help for my depression and other mental issues that I've had since age 12.Believers warned that my life was going to spiral out of control and my sins were going to eat me alive. They still insist even up to this day. I no longer feel like this angers me as it did initially. I recently caught up with those same individuals and realized they haven't evolved as human beings in all the years I've known them. Sadness rather than anger is a more appropriate emotion to feel for them. 7 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Orbit Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Congratulations! So glad to hear it! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leo Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Congratulations! As a very recent deconvert, I have to say your story is encouraging. I, also, noted how different my life as an apostate actually is, compared to the threats portrayed by the Bible, and the caricature drawn up about what an apostate is supposed to look like. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RealityCheck Posted September 9, 2014 Author Share Posted September 9, 2014 Congratulations! As a very recent deconvert, I have to say your story is encouraging. I, also, noted how different my life as an apostate actually is, compared to the threats portrayed by the Bible, and the caricature drawn up about what an apostate is supposed to look like. By our behaviors and actions, we can demonstrate to some Christians how fulfilling life as an apostate can be. This isn't going to be noted by all of them and it isn't going to deconvert anyone. It does chip away at the foundation of their faith by destroying one more misconception. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jdog Posted September 9, 2014 Share Posted September 9, 2014 Your post is so good to read. Love to hear the positives of deconverting. Congrats. I've been out since 2008. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
milesaway Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Congrats! Take those believers' warnings with a grain of salt, they're only scare tactics to try to win you back. You living your life on your terms instead of accepting ancient folktales as an acceptable framework for living scares them to no end, and they're probably jealous deep down. It doesn't surprise me at all to hear they haven't changed since you saw them last. It's all part of the groupthink. It reminds me of the last time I saw someone from the last church I visited driving in the opposite direction I was biking to. She seemed every bit as cold, rude, bitter and spiteful as she was when I knew her, and all I felt was pity towards her. I pity every single one of them now. I'm glad you finally got the help you needed. You were never gonna get it in a church setting, no matter how adamant they were that you were going to. Take it one day at a time, but that's easier said than done in reality. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bhim Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Congrats! I myself recently hit the four year mark, and I have no regrets. Since fleeing Jesus I've earned a PhD, gotten married (to a non-Christian), and started a job with quite a nice salary. I'm sure this forum is filled with such counterexamples to the suggestion that leaving Jesus will ruin your life. Evangelicals only say that because they know threats of eternal torment won't work on someone who's seen Jesus for the fraud he is. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator TrueFreedom Posted September 10, 2014 Moderator Share Posted September 10, 2014 My apostasy caused a lot of problems for me for the first few years, since I was so involved with so many people in so many Christian fundamentalist activities, but I'm finally at peace, and I'm happier than I was as a Jesus-believer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted September 10, 2014 Share Posted September 10, 2014 Two years! Good for you! It's nice having god out of your head, isn't it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rach Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Believers warned that my life was going to spiral out of control and my sins were going to eat me alive. They still insist even up to this day. I no longer feel like this angers me as it did initially. I recently caught up with those same individuals and realized they haven't evolved as human beings in all the years I've known them. Sadness rather than anger is a more appropriate emotion to feel for them. I feel sad and disappointed in the lack of "evolution" occurring in my Christian family members. When your entire perspective of yourself and your purpose and history and the universe comes from one book it imposes profound limitations on one's development. I've been changing rapidly every year in the past five or so years since I left the faith. My family members however are thinking the same thoughts and doing the same exact programs like the Christmas program they've done every year for their whole lives. I was sick of the Christmas program after the first couple times of doing it. But with them its like the thought never even occurs to do something different. So they keep going around in circles doing the same things every year and holding the same opinions, much of which involves gay-bashing and bashing of different cultures. Whereas I have been exploring different ideas and activities, gaining new perspectives, and am walking in a straight line of continual self-development. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Brother Jeff Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 On September the 6th I celebrated 2 years of being Jesus free. I can't quite articulate how much my life has been altered in all it's detail. I've had to learn life lessons that weren't possible inside the confines of my religion. I've come out as an individual with far more mental clarity. I've discovered confidence and learned to take the initiative. Most importantly, I finally got professional help for my depression and other mental issues that I've had since age 12. Believers warned that my life was going to spiral out of control and my sins were going to eat me alive. They still insist even up to this day. I no longer feel like this angers me as it did initially. I recently caught up with those same individuals and realized they haven't evolved as human beings in all the years I've known them. Sadness rather than anger is a more appropriate emotion to feel for them. Bless the Lard, Brother! Glory! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
FreeThinkerNZ Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Congrats RC! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ravenstar Posted September 11, 2014 Share Posted September 11, 2014 Congratulations! I found the most amazing growth when I let go of the belief that god 'had a plan' for me, and took the reins in my own hands. It's very freeing 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Voice Posted September 13, 2014 Share Posted September 13, 2014 Hey RC, I didn't know you had issues with depression. Something to stay on top of if you can, I struggle with it too. It's a thing they will use against us. I'll be interested to know how you manage with this while facing off xtians who have an agenda for us and mean to condemn us. You've come a long way in 2 years. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RealityCheck Posted September 15, 2014 Author Share Posted September 15, 2014 Thanks everyone. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MySockSmell Posted September 15, 2014 Share Posted September 15, 2014 Believers warned that my life was going to spiral out of control and my sins were going to eat me alive. Christianity uses your own nervous system against you. The nastiest trick Christianity pulls is to hijack recursive, reflective and reflexive neuro-linguistic/semantic brain mechanisms to get people to introspectively turn their own conscience against itself struggling to solve imaginary problems like sin. Feelings are not statements about who you are, whether positive or negative. But Christianity would have you believe that when your brain chemistry makes you feel physically nervous, anxious or depressed, then it must be "speaking" a metaphysical or ontological truth about you personally. Christianity wouldn't work without creating self-doubt, self-betrayal and self-alienation. Once it has tricked you into reacting negatively to being depressed, anxious or nervous, it treats that negative reaction like it was the original stimulus and calls it your "sinfulness". It uses your own depression or anxiety to trap you in a feedback loop of thoughts about thoughts, feelings about feelings, beliefs about beliefs. It's hard for believers to step outside the hall of mirrors to realize that concepts like "sin" only exploit brain chemistry imbalances and does nothing to balance them. For me, Christianity ended up generating a state of paranoia where the darkness "might" win; therefore, the light "must" win. It's a false dilemma that leads to a lot of "what-if" thinking and endless covering of theological bases just in case some variable got left out of the salvation equation. If the victim doesn't get healed, the victim is to blame. The spell was broken after I realized I didn't need to be saved from anything, especially "myself". One of the clues that tipped me off to how Christianity forces people to poison themselves before taking the Jesus cure is the story of former missionary Daniel Everett's failure to convert the Piraha tribe which led to his deconversion. The Piraha language lacks recursion. They can't be tricked by fixed ideas, abstractions, paradoxes or semantic argle-bargle created by inserting thoughts into thoughts. There was no way he could make them feel deficient, broken, self-loathing. He couldn't find the "god shaped void" that all humans are supposed to possess. There was nothing "wrong" with them. Dan also couldn't find anything in nature itself with which demonstrate the existence of a creator God. He had been trained in seminary that you have to get them lost before you can get them saved, but he just couldn't find a way to get the Piraha to damn themselves. Bottom line is, people are going to be afraid, depressed and worried, but Christianity makes them afraid of being afraid, depressed about being depressed and worried because they have worries - and then calls that evidence of sin. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Super Moderator TheRedneckProfessor Posted September 15, 2014 Super Moderator Share Posted September 15, 2014 It's been 11 years for me and life has gotten so much better it is indescribable. I wouldn't trade it for all the blood on the cross. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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