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Goodbye Jesus

7 Real Deadly Sins


R. S. Martin

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http://www.landoverbaptist.org/news0602/sinquiz.html

 

Landover Baptist is a parody of (I think) Westboro Baptist. If you want to know what the Bible really says, do the quiz and click the button to see the correct answer. 

 

Sampe Question and Answer:

 

3. Which of the following acts of violence is a sin?

A. Driving a nail through the head of a guest you don’t like. 
B. Killing handicapped people you don’t like. 
C. Torturing and killing animals to punish people you don’t like. 
D. Trick question. These acts are praiseworthy, not sinful.

 

3.  Which of the following acts of violence is a sin?

Correct Answer: D (Trick question. These acts are praiseworthy, not sinful.) “Then Jael Heber’s wife took a nail of the tent, and took an hammer in her hand, and went softly unto him, and smote the nail into his temples, and fastened it into the ground: for he was fast asleep and weary. So he died” (Judges 4:21). “Blessed above women shall Jael the wife of Heber the Kenit be . . . She put her hand to the nail, and her right hand to the workmen’s hammer; and with the hammer she smote Sisera, she smote off his head, when she had pierced and stricken through his temples” (Judges 5:24-26). “And David said on that day, Whosoever getteth up to the gutter, and smiteth the Jebusites, and the lame and the blind, that are hated of David’s soul, he shall be chief and captain. Wherefore they said, The blind and the lame shall not come into the house” (2 Samuel 5:8). “And Samson went and caught three hundred foxes, and took firebrands, and turned tail to tail, and put a firebrand in the midst between two tails. And when he had set the brands on fire, he let them go into the standing corn of the Philistines” (Judges 15:4-5). 
 

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Heh. I'm reminded of the poem The Latest Decalogue, by Arthur Hugh Clough (this version from Poem of the Week):

 

The Latest Decalogue

 

    Thou shalt have one God only; who
    Would tax himself to worship two?
    God's image nowhere shalt thou see,
    Save haply in the currency:
    Swear not at all; since for thy curse
    Thine enemy is not the worse:
    At church on Sunday to attend
    Will help to keep the world thy friend:
    Honor thy parents; that is, all
    From whom promotion may befall:
    Thou shalt not kill; but needst not strive
    Officiously to keep alive:
    Adultery it is not fit
    Or safe, for women, to commit:
    Thou shalt not steal; an empty feat,
    When 'tis so lucrative to cheat:
    False witness not to bear be strict;
    And cautious, ere you contradict.
    Thou shalt not covet; but tradition
    Sanctions the keenest competition.

 

 

So... it looks like the more things change, the more things stay the same. This was written in the 19th Century, but might as well have been written today, about the overbearing hypocrisy and greediness of American Evangelical style Six Flags Over Jesus popular Christianity. It's all about appearances, double standards, and money-grubbing power-lust.

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 I especially love God's obsession with first-born sons.  In Exodus 13:2 the Lord said "Consecrate to me every first-born that opens the womb among Israelites, both man and beast, for it belongs to me." 

 

"Consecrate" means a burning sacrifice. Nice god.

 

 sing_99.gif   Jesus loves the little children of the world.....Ridigwoopsie.gif

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 I especially love God's obsession with first-born sons.  In Exodus 13:2 the Lord said "Consecrate to me every first-born that opens the womb among Israelites, both man and beast, for it belongs to me." 

 

"Consecrate" means a burning sacrifice. Nice god.

 

 sing_99.gif   Jesus loves the little children of the world.....Ridigwoopsie.gif

"...red and yellow, black and white..."

 

I guess Mexicans don't rate.  Lousy god.

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