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Goodbye Jesus

Wife's Dream Proves God Is Real


LongWayAround

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I have been de-converted for about 10 months now and fully out to my christian wife about the deconversion for about 5 months.  During that time, she has really ramped-up her religiosity.  She studies the bible, prays,and listens to christian music more than anytime in the past.  Things are generally going well between us despite my deconversion.

 

Okay, begin rant: My wife really wants me to realize I have made a mistake and start believing again. Her latest proof that god exists is a dream that she had. 

 

The son of a religious friend of hers got hurt doing a stupid dare and ended up in the emergency room.  In addition to stitches, they gave him a week's worth of pain killers to "take as needed".  He took them all within 24 hours.  My wife knew all of this information before having a dream about her friend's son.  She dreamed that someone told her the son was dead and it was not a result of the pain killers.  She awoke and began praying that god would protect the son.  Later that day she found out from her friend that the son didn't come home the night before and a sheriff's deputy found him walking down the center of a road in a glazed-over stupor then took him to the emergency room.

 

My wife claims that the dream was a message from god and that there is no other plausible explanation of how she would have known the son was in trouble.  My thoughts on the the whole thing are:

  1. There wasn't anything in the dream that any reasonable person wouldn't have concluded from the facts we already knew.
  2. If omniscient god gave her the information in a dream why did he get the information wrong and say he was dead and not wandering down the middle of road?!?
  3. What good came out of the dream?  The dream didn't help rescue the son or help his mother or my wife in any way.  Oh, yeah, I forgot.  The dream proved that god is real.
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I'm not sure what to make of that either.  The dream makes sense in lieu of what your wife knew about the boy beforehand.  And dreams are very emotional, especially right after waking up, so I get her feeling very strongly about it.

 

But no, that dream isn't making me revoke my atheism either.

 

Has she had any dreams about you being wheat bowing down to her?

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she dreamt someone told her the boy was dead and she prayed about it and he lived?

 

the person who said the kid is dead is untrue or god answered her prayer?

 

or her dream is weird?

 

let her write down every dream she have every or any night n that will show how weird your wife can be,,,,,,,,

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In answer to point number 2, god didn't get it wrong.  The son would have died but for your wife's intercessory prayer.  He was, after all, wandering down the road and god had already foreseen the drunk driver in the red Mini-Cooper who was going to swerve at just the right time to careen into the boy because he was turning his radio up as his favorite Pantera song came on.

 

Okay, maybe god didn't know about the Pantera part; but he got the rest of it right.  ;)

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Sounds like your wife is pretty upset at your deconversion, hence the ramping up of religious devotion and having dreams to prove religion to you.  Hope it works out and you guys can get along without being the same religion, maybe you can convince her to go to marriage counseling?

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I can see how your wife would think that is proof for God, because there are lots of stories of God waking somebody up to pray for somebody else.

 

Does this experience make you question your own deconversion, or are you concerned that it will make your wife's deconversion less likely?

 

It seems like the best argument against this evidence is the absurdity of a God who is so stingy about answering prayers and helping people to know he exists.

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I had a dream once that I was hacked to death by a red-headed dwarf.  Does my dream prove the existence of Gimli, son of Gloin?

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Sounds like your wife is pretty upset at your deconversion, hence the ramping up of religious devotion and having dreams to prove religion to you.  Hope it works out and you guys can get along without being the same religion, maybe you can convince her to go to marriage counseling?

 

We have been to marriage counseling in the past for other issues and it was very helpful.  I haven't ruled it out to deal with this situation but I don't think it is the right time yet.

 

 

I can see how your wife would think that is proof for God, because there are lots of stories of God waking somebody up to pray for somebody else.

 

Does this experience make you question your own deconversion, or are you concerned that it will make your wife's deconversion less likely?

 

It seems like the best argument against this evidence is the absurdity of a God who is so stingy about answering prayers and helping people to know he exists.

 

This experience reinforces my deconversion and makes me even less hopeful that my wife will ever deconvert.

 

I had a dream once that I was hacked to death by a red-headed dwarf.  Does my dream prove the existence of Gimli, son of Gloin?

 

I don't think anyone is disputing that Gimli exists.  That would be crazy-talk.

 

I had a dream about a week and a half ago that I had, gulp, a week and a half to live.  The part that struck me when I woke up, was that at no point in the dream did I have any doubts about the fact that when I died, that was the end and there was nothing after that.   The dream was mostly about me trying to get my affairs in order so that my wife and kids wouldn't fight over the stuff I left them.

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No offense,

But this could be in the humour section.

 

Dreams are bizzare and incoherent.

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Sounds like your wife is pretty upset at your deconversion, hence the ramping up of religious devotion and having dreams to prove religion to you.  Hope it works out and you guys can get along without being the same religion, maybe you can convince her to go to marriage counseling?

 

We have been to marriage counseling in the past for other issues and it was very helpful.  I haven't ruled it out to deal with this situation but I don't think it is the right time yet.

 

I would find a counselor that's worked on this particular issue with other clients. It just seems to me like something that needs experience, to be able to understand where both people are coming from.

 

I've been in a relationship where I wanted her to change and she wanted me to change, and unfortunately we could never get past it. But we never got help either.

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I had a bizarre dream last night that I was the star of several old Western movies made back in the 1930's or 1940's. I have no idea where that dream came from since it's been months since I watched such an old Western flick (it was a very old John Wayne movie from the 1930's), but does the fact that I dreamed it make it true? Did I dream of a past life as a Hollywood star of old Westerns?

 

Dreams are not proof of anything other than brain activity while we are asleep...

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I once had a strangely specific precognitive dream about my mother's oven breaking down.  Within 24 hours it did so (though not as explosively as in the dream).

 

I was not a Christian at the time.  I was as I am now.

 

You could tell her that this proves the power of the deities of the East Mediterranean.

 

(By the way - I don't actually believe that it proves anything of the sort - but by the same reasoning as your wife's, why isn't my pantheon validated in her eyes?)

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Lassie:  Arf Arf!

 

Timmy:  What's wrong girl?

 

Lassie:  Arf Arf!

 

Timmy:  Old Man Jenkins fell into a dry well and we need to bring at least 25 feet of rope to get him out?  I'll tell dad!

 

Lassie:  Arf Arf!

 

 

 

Yeah, that is how much the dream related to real events.

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...My wife claims that the dream was a message from god and that there is no other plausible explanation of how she would have known the son was in trouble.  

...

 

There are many plausible explanations that do not require pleading to sky fairy intervention.

 

1)  Given all the facts she was aware of before the dream, the human mind can easily create a plausible fiction, based on those facts, which would include the content of the dream she had.  Indeed, the fiction could have been much more surreal.

 

2)  Dreams often are fictions based on some actual known facts.

 

3)  The dream did not line up with what actually happened 100%.  Maybe 50%.  Your wife latches onto the similarities but ignores the differences.  She is lying to herself.  This is a common behavior of theists and partially explains why she believes her particular sky fairy intervened.

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