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Goodbye Jesus

Every Wrong With The Gay Christian Network In 5 Reasons


NoOne

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A Christian and lesbian acquaintance of mine told me about the Gay Christian Network because I was bisexual (actually still questioning at the time) and was struggling with my faith. I was part of the GCN from October to December of 2014. The reason I left was because I had deconverted and it was obvious that I wasn't welcome there anymore. I was going to stay just because I was interested in the conservations and ideas about the LGBTQ+ community and their rights. But it was obvious that the site was more "Christian" than it was "gay". When I first joined I was in awe; looking bad, I'm kind of disgusted. Here's why, for all those who are unfamiliar with the GCN:

 

1) For gay Christians...you know people who have ostracized for who they are and people who also believe in this concept of undying love...they were pretty freaking judgmental. Just say anything about atheism, Islam, or evolution, and you'll get the most Christ-like responses on the planet!! *sarcasm if you didn't catch it*

 

2) They had unfair exceptions. Non-Christians are going to hell, the "sexually immoral" (i.e., pornstars) are going to hell, etc. But not gay people! Despite the Bible saying 6 different times that homosexuality is an abomination, homosexuals aren't going to heaven, and that sodomy is looked down upon, they still believed that they were going to see those pearly gates! You can't cherry-pick your own freaking holy book like that then wonder why some people stop believing. There were also users who had the biggest victim complex ever. I had one white user dismiss racism and basically say it's nothing when I wrote about living in a racist and homophobic town and about the homophobia among black Christians. The same user said in a different post that the worst thing Christians have ever done was the Crusades which happened hundreds of years ago (yeah, let's forget WBC and the KKK and Hitler...)

 

3) They did religion to a tee. One of the biggest problems I have with religion is that you have to sacrifice your happiness and the only life you'll have in order to please a god who may not even be there. They had different sides, because to them, the real question wasn't "Is homosexuality a sin?" it actually was "Are gay sex and same-sex unions okay in God's eyes?" Side A believes that God blesses same-sex marriages and that gay sex is fine, while Side B believes that homosexuals should commit to lifelong celibacy and be single. I was definitely Side A...it doesn't make sense. You're going to hide your attractions and just never fall in love and have a beautiful family of your own because you're worried that it might be wrong in God's eyes? Didn't God make you gay, isn't that what you all believe? Why would He make you be alone for life while everyone else around you is getting married and being happy?

 

4) They recycled the same Christian arguments over and over again. They didn't think they had a burden of proof. They always answered "man's free will!" when you asked a serious question on the problem of hell and the problem of evil. It was disappointing because you think they would have more to offer. Also, they seemed pretty offended or hostile when you questioned their beliefs. You're gay and part of a religion that says you're going to hell for the way you were born...HOW ARE YOU UPSET WHEN YOUR VIEWS GET QUESTIONED, YOU SHOULD BE USED TO IT!!!!

 

5) Okay, most of the users were awesome people. I will admit that. But the ones who always were there, particularly the ones replying to everyone, were either annoying, self-righteous or unpleasant, sometimes all 3. Speaking of which, they always had to pull the "you think too much" and the "you're so young" cards on me. When you say either one of those things to me, you lose all credibility. Yeah, I do think a lot but I'd rather think too much about something and realize it doesn't hold any water against rational thought instead of being ignorant and accepting something blindly. And yeah, I'm young. I don't know anything, 15 years isn't a long time to have lived. But if you just jump to that to shut me up, it shows you have nothing valid to say because I actually said something that's too much for you. Honestly, I felt like I studied and analyzed Christianity more than these grown adults did. Which is cool and disgusting at the same time.

 

Sorry, I know I wrote a freaking essay. I just haven't had the chance to express my hurt and disappointment for this community that I thought would be so supportive and helpful. It was just like any other Christian place out there, there's nothing else to be said about that. I know I'll probably get a lot of "TLDR" but if you do actually care to read the whole thing...do you have any opinions on this all?

<3

Thanks and have a wonderful MLK Day!!!

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Thanks for sharing. Sorry that you were treated badly in that situation, but I expect much better things for you on this forum. Enjoy the journey ahead of you....

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It does seem to be a strange part of human nature.  People forget what they have been through and inflict the same pain on others.  Even the bible is full of it with Moses escaping with the slaves, setting up his own nation which then goes about killing and enslaving those around them.  Or the example of Israel, Jews are treated badly until they get their own nation then treat those around them badly in turn.

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I'm so sorry they turned their backs on you like that. It doesn't surprise me one bit, unfortunately. When I deconverted, I was at a xtian dating site, and with one exception, the people who were all over me in the site's chatroom before I told them I wouldn't be joining the church all started ignoring me and acting like I wasn't there. This seems to be par for the course with xtians in a lot of cases with something like a deconversion. It's because we're a reminder of their own doubts and their own fears. 

 

I personally don't identify as LGBT, but I have friends who do, and I think the way christendom treats those who identify as LGBT was part of what led to my deconversion. I thought about those who were probably LGBT in the congregation at the last church I attended, and how miserable they must have been. Because of that stupid social club's rules, they couldn't have the families they probably all wanted to have if they wanted to stay in the club's good graces. Or they used members of the opposite gender as beards in order to get it. Looking back, a guy I met during the last year of my sojourn in xtianity was probably gay and totally in the closet. Considering the homophobia he grew up around, at home and at the super-exclusive all boys private xtian school he attended from elementary through high school, it's no wonder. My heart really goes out to those like him. The religion they grew up with marginalizing them and telling them they can't do ABC and XYZ because they're not "normal" has to be so upsetting. 

 

You may be young, but so what? Big fucking deal. You're able to think for yourself, and that will serve you well in the long run. You probably treated those people with more genuine compassion and kindness than they ever got out of their fellow congregation members who don't practice what they preach. That's their loss. Sexuality is fluid, and how you identify now may or may not be different 10 years from now. 

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Trying to make a version of Christianity that is positive to LGBT doesn't work.  You would have to throw away the Bible.  But without the Bible you would be making up the religion as you go along.  It would lose the appearance of legitimacy.

 

 

I think the hatred in the Bible is driving the ex-Christian movement.  You don't have to be LGBT to see that it is wrong to mistreat others or to deny them basic human rights.

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A gay xtian is like a black kkk. I really don't see why gay people would even think of being xtian(Stockholm syndrome?) im gay and would rather die than be any of the abrahamic "religions" *spit*

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A gay xtian is like a black kkk. I really don't see why gay people would even think of being xtian(Stockholm syndrome?) im gay and would rather die than be any of the abrahamic "religions" *spit*

 

 

Yeah the odd thing is that millions of Christian couples went and had gay children.  It's just the words of the Bible flying in the face of reality.  For example I have very good reason to believe my cousin is a lesbian even though she has not come out.  If she did come out that would be a complete disaster on account of my aunt's (and to a lesser extend my uncle's) fundamentalism.  So it wouldn't surprise me the least bit if there is going to be a massive crap storm shortly after my cousin graduates from college.  

 

Most gay Christians are not choosing this.  Rather they are inflicted with a religion that doesn't fit and they have to try to figure it out.

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A gay xtian is like a black kkk. I really don't see why gay people would even think of being xtian(Stockholm syndrome?) im gay and would rather die than be any of the abrahamic "religions" *spit*

This ^^^

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Suffering severe cognitive dissonance does not seem to be a reason for some people to break away from the addictive aspects of religion.  No matter how bad having it in their lives is, not having it seems worse to them. It's like crack. Just be glad it didn't add you to the numbers of those destroyed by it. 

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So let me just fix my grammatical error in the title because it's making me go crazy...EveryTHING, not every. That's been getting at me for a while. I feel like for a lot of these people, they want to imagine a pro-gay, ultra loving God because most of them grew up being told the usual Christian stuff..."God hates gays" or "homosexuality is a sin that sends you to hell". They still want Christianity, just without the unappealing homophobia. Which is kind of impossible...

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MGG, I agree a lot with Human and others on here.

 

I ran into a site called GayChristian101.com which outlines their thinking, that the gay practices in the old testament weren't the gay loving relationships we are all familiar with today, but were some specific occultic practices. This they also do with Paul's passages in the New Testament.

 

But people distance themselves like Human was saying. Why are blacks even Christian? After all, the Bible was used as a tool to enslave, and also uphold laws against interracial marriages. Hell, even white! I know many groups call Christianity the white man's religion but it's not: it's an Eastern religion like Islam, and most of us whites who were ever converts to begin with are such because of several major invasions where literally thousands of practitioners of native religions were slaughtered (martyred?) in a day: Charlemagne cut down the Saxons' groves and executed their priests. Clovis did a tremendous amount of this activity in France also.

 

Christianity doesn't belong to us: it belongs, like Islam and Judaism, with Isis in the desert.

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