Moxie Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 The christians I grew up with hated me. They didn't want me in their circle because I actually took the religion seriously and wanted to study the bible. Studying brought on the doubt. What I wish I could tell them is: "If you don't want me around you on earth, then why in the hell would you want me to spend eternity with you in heaven?" When christians shun dissenters and heretics, they are actually saying they don't want those people in heaven either. Has anyone ever had this experience? 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdelsolray Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Should you really care what some Christians say, particularly the childish, self-centered and tribal ones you referenced? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moxie Posted April 20, 2015 Author Share Posted April 20, 2015 It's not that I care. I would love to have the opportunity to ask them my question though. Heck, it could be a challenge for the christians on this site. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
rach Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I was an attender at church for a long 15 or so years. My Saved! peers knew me well, and loathed me. I couldn't do anything right in their eyes. I was not smart or pretty and didn't know how to socialize. Those were my greatest sins. I didn't have nice clothes or shoes, in fact I was usually dressed in the same ratty old dress every week, with big glasses. Walking into sunday school with all those haughty eyes upon me, and all those empty seats which suddenly weren't available, I might as well have been sent to hell every Sunday. But they loooooved me. They ridiculed my looks, excluded me in conversation, laughed when I couldn't answer the questions right, and found it hilarious when I took the bible "too seriously" and cried and self-harmed because I was afraid I'd go to hell (the place they passionately warned me about every week). But they looooved me. They wanted my soul saved. Why exactly did these people give a damn about my soul? They hated everything about me. I couldn't be on their team at game time but they wanted me to live with them forever and be part of their eternal family? Bloody hell. One of the boys used to torment me at singing time. I couldn't sing, just couldn't keep up with or understand the words on the screen, so I'd just stand their quietly or mouth some jibberish words to myself. He liked to make a scene about me not singing. Today he's an "evangelist" who preaches against bullying. I've never heard one word of apology from that fool. If I saw him today, he'd tell me how much he loooooves me. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Their Jesus must be just like them. Another false friend. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ Fuego ♦ Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Lot of creeps in the world. Religion gives them an excuse to be bullies with the tacit approval of their god. Have you seen the arrogant mockery that Boko Haram puts in their videos after raping and beheading dozens? They aren't really promoting a religion as much as enjoying being bullies with guns. A large church I briefly attended was all about herding the sheep, no questions, just obey. Raise questions or want justifications and I'd hear "You'd probably be happier somewhere else." That was it. They simply wanted to control people and not be questioned, ever. And tithe and give all you can so the pastor can buy another diamond ring. The guy wore at least 6 at a time. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thackerie Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I was an attender at church for a long 15 or so years. My Saved! peers knew me well, and loathed me. I couldn't do anything right in their eyes. I was not smart or pretty and didn't know how to socialize. Those were my greatest sins. I didn't have nice clothes or shoes, in fact I was usually dressed in the same ratty old dress every week, with big glasses. Walking into sunday school with all those haughty eyes upon me, and all those empty seats which suddenly weren't available, I might as well have been sent to hell every Sunday. But they loooooved me. They ridiculed my looks, excluded me in conversation, laughed when I couldn't answer the questions right, and found it hilarious when I took the bible "too seriously" and cried and self-harmed because I was afraid I'd go to hell (the place they passionately warned me about every week). But they looooved me. They wanted my soul saved. Why exactly did these people give a damn about my soul? They hated everything about me. I couldn't be on their team at game time but they wanted me to live with them forever and be part of their eternal family? Bloody hell. One of the boys used to torment me at singing time. I couldn't sing, just couldn't keep up with or understand the words on the screen, so I'd just stand their quietly or mouth some jibberish words to myself. He liked to make a scene about me not singing. Today he's an "evangelist" who preaches against bullying. I've never heard one word of apology from that fool. If I saw him today, he'd tell me how much he loooooves me. The apple doesn't fall far from the tree. Their Jesus must be just like them. Another false friend. I attended Sunday School for a brief time (that seemed interminably long) at an Evangelical Methodist Church where all the other kids were students at the church's private day school. I was the only one attending public school and I guess they hated me for that, as well as the fact that, like you, "I was usually dressed in the same ratty old dress every week, with big glasses" and I was shy and didn't know how to socialize. Plus, I was fat. But, I found out why these snotty, mean brats cared about my soul from something the SS teacher said: "The more souls you win for Jesus, the more crowns you'll wear in Heaven." I guess they were looking forward to continue to lord it over us crownless geeks for all eternity. But, see, it was nothing personal; they could loathe you or not give a damn about you -- it was all about collecting that bounty. None of the fundigelicals I encountered as an adult ever grew out of this mindset. They're still just snotty, mean-spirited bounty hunters of souls. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I never had a good discussion about religion or doubts or questions about the bible in any church group. They always just said, "Keep believing," or "because god," or something equally dumb. My son got kicked out of his confirmation classes because he kept asking questions, the youth leader wouldn't answer them rationally, so my son acted bored because he was frustrated. My son was 15 and got kicked out by being sent a letter from the youth leader telling him "You don't seem ready yet," but he had never called or written to me or notified me about any of this. I emailed the youth leader telling him that he should have let me know what was going on with my under-18-year-old son before he sent only my son that letter, and I disagreed with how he went about it, and my son was entitled to rational answers to rational questions. He never replied. That was the end of any of us attending church at all. Nobody from that church ever contacted us again. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Thackerie Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I never had a good discussion about religion or doubts or questions about the bible in any church group. They always just said, "Keep believing," or "because god," or something equally dumb. My son got kicked out of his confirmation classes because he kept asking questions, the youth leader wouldn't answer them rationally, so my son acted bored because he was frustrated. My son was 15 and got kicked out by being sent a letter from the youth leader telling him "You don't seem ready yet," but he had never called or written to me or notified me about any of this. I emailed the youth leader telling him that he should have let me know what was going on with my under-18-year-old son before he sent only my son that letter, and I disagreed with how he went about it, and my son was entitled to rational answers to rational questions. He never replied. That was the end of any of us attending church at all. Nobody from that church ever contacted us again. Your son sounds like a wise young man. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I never had a good discussion about religion or doubts or questions about the bible in any church group. They always just said, "Keep believing," or "because god," or something equally dumb. My son got kicked out of his confirmation classes because he kept asking questions, the youth leader wouldn't answer them rationally, so my son acted bored because he was frustrated. My son was 15 and got kicked out by being sent a letter from the youth leader telling him "You don't seem ready yet," but he had never called or written to me or notified me about any of this. I emailed the youth leader telling him that he should have let me know what was going on with my under-18-year-old son before he sent only my son that letter, and I disagreed with how he went about it, and my son was entitled to rational answers to rational questions. He never replied. That was the end of any of us attending church at all. Nobody from that church ever contacted us again. Your son sounds like a wise young man. My son is an awesome young man, and has always been scary-smart!!! He's now a software engineer living in Seattle, and at 24 he bought his own condo in the heart of downtown Seattle, three blocks from the Space Needle! He never fit in at church, and never even fit in with half his teachers all his years through public school, but we always knew he was super-smart and had his head on straight and knew he'd turn out well -- and he did! The teachers of his gifted classes always loved him, but a lot of his regular teachers were frustrated by him -- we'd try to tell him to have some pity on them, but he never did! He thought everybody should be as smart as he was. I have no idea why he tolerated me, other than I fed him. He's a lot like Sheldon from the "Big Bang Theory," a lot of the endearing parts and some of the annoying parts! I was so glad when he graduated high school and I no longer had to try to explain him, or apologize for him, to teachers! He gets along great with his co-workers and employers, who are just like him. He's coming home for a few weeks this summer to attend a friend's wedding and to visit us, and I am so excited to see him again! I've loved visiting him in Seattle; it's gorgeous out there! Churches sure don't seem to like smart, questioning people. Like JoJo said in the original post, the xians at her church hated her because she wanted to study the bible and take religion seriously. They just want obedient sheep that give them money. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Furball Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 The christians I grew up with hated me. They didn't want me in their circle because I actually took the religion seriously and wanted to study the bible. Studying brought on the doubt. What I wish I could tell them is: "If you don't want me around you on earth, then why in the hell would you want me to spend eternity with you in heaven?" When christians shun dissenters and heretics, they are actually saying they don't want those people in heaven either. Has anyone ever had this experience? I had the problem of being "too Christian" for my fellow sheep. People didn't like me because i quoted the bible all the time and wanted to talk about jesus and nothing else. When service ended, they all wanted to talk about themselves and what they were doing out in the world, when i would start talking endlessly about jesus, (which is what we were suppose to be doing), they would get annoyed with me and walk away. One person and i actually had a romantic connection and started to progress towards a relationship, but the fact that i kept talking about jesus and wanting to talk about scripture, the other person asked me if i was one of those jesus freaks, and decided that they didn't want to be with me because i was "too" into jesus. Imagine that, another christian who claims to love jesus and the bible hating another christian for wanting to talk about jesus and the bible. The pastor and his minions also hated me because i was always asking questions, or else i was quoting scripture to them to show where they were wrong in their beliefs or preaching. Christians didn't like me for actually taking christianity seriously. It was always calm down, or just pray about it, or don't take it so literally (seriously). Nonsense. -Cat 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Furball Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 As far as clothing goes. I too usually wore the same "sunday" clothes to church. All the other people showed up in 3 piece suits. The women all showed up dressed to the 9's looking like they just stepped out of a beverly hills salon and clothing store. Let's not forget the fancy sports cars and luxury cars that filled the parking lots as well. I'd get out of my ford wearing plain, boring looking clothing, then see some 20 something year woman would step out of her mercedes benz wearing 4 inch stilettos and what looked like an expensive mini dress on, clad with diamond necklace, sparkling diamond rings and bracelets. Hypocrites. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 When service ended, they all wanted to talk about themselves and what they were doing out in the world, when i would start talking endlessly about jesus, (which is what we were suppose to be doing), they would get annoyed with me and walk away. That is so true! There was always the donut/coffee hour between the two services in my church, and I never heard a single conversation about the day's sermon or religion! The conversations were always about what the kids were up to, and what the plans were for the rest of the day, and which retired folks were heading to or from Florida for the season, etc. I always found that funny in a strange way. As far as clothing goes. I too usually wore the same "sunday" clothes to church. All the other people showed up in 3 piece suits. The women all showed up dressed to the 9's looking like they just stepped out a of a beverly hills salon and clothing store. Let's not forget the fancy sports cars and luxury cars that filled the parking lots as well. I'd get out of my ford wearing plain, boring looking clothing, then see some 20 something year woman step out of her mercedes benz wearing 4 inch stilettos and what looked like an expensive mini dress on, clad with diamond necklace, sparkling diamond rings and bracelets. Hypocrites. That same church I attended was also like this. Everybody dressed to the nine's, and women would out-do each other to provide fancy desserts for different functions -- boxed cookies would never do! They would say that people accused them of being a "country club church," but they were so offended by that and said they were loving and accepting of everyone. Not! Another woman that joined the church around the same time I did came to church once wearing (*gasp!*) pants, nice work-pants with a nice blouse and heels, hair done, nice makeup, but PANTS, and an older woman pulled her aside to gently chide her, "We don't dress like that here, dear." This was around 1992, NOT 1952, by the way. Yes. Hypocrites. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellinas Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 I found that I was accepted by those Christians who agreed with me, distrusted by those who did not. None of them hated me anything like as much as I have come to hate their religion. There is a strong bourgeois snobbery amongst Christians, however, and a tendency to exercise their Christian humility by looking down on those who do not wear smart suits or expensive dresses. There's a word for that. Now then, what was it...? Ah, yes! "Hypocrisy". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
themonkeyman Posted April 20, 2015 Share Posted April 20, 2015 Each I'm sure ur beautiful if u put ur hair down Rachel and are like one of those girls in the movies :-). My church hated me asking questions I almost got booted out from church because I caused two missionary people to doubt they faith 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sdelsolray Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 It's not that I care. I would love to have the opportunity to ask them my question though. Heck, it could be a challenge for the christians on this site. Then go back (in history) and ask them. And ask the Christians you meet here, or elsewhere, the same question in the appropriate situations. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moxie Posted April 21, 2015 Author Share Posted April 21, 2015 Wow, I'm not the only one. What I could never wrap around my mind was the christians' aversion to their own doctrines. I remember being in a shopping mall with the youth group. We were all in high school. I saw a christian bookstore, and walked toward it to see what nuggets of christian "wisdom" I could find. I overheard the youth group sighing and saying things like, "oh, there she goes." I thought that as christians, we were supposed to be on fire for god and ever seek the path of righteousness. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mwc Posted April 21, 2015 Share Posted April 21, 2015 These people *did* want you with them in heaven...*their* version of heaven. It's the whole passive-aggressive thing that xians (and most everyone else who believes any sort of this shit) pull where "Someday you'll see..." meaning you'll die and everything they're telling you will pan out. You'll see their god, their heaven and know all their truths. And they'll be right and you'll be wrong. You'll see. But until then? You can fuck right off. mwc 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
themonkeyman Posted April 22, 2015 Share Posted April 22, 2015 Interestingly Jesus said those who are not humble won't see the kingdom so I do wonder how many actual Christians will GOTO heaven. Notice Christians always seem to be financially well off. In my old church I did stuff for everyone but was never a leader.... Why? Because my offering was only £5.00 per week. There were times I starved as a student and got in debt but still gave what little I had to the church. Yet im sure I could never ask them to help me out of debt even Christians against poverty never pay off peoples debts instead they encourage people to become bankrupt Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SCM Posted April 24, 2015 Share Posted April 24, 2015 the comments here echo my experience. maybe not the really nice clothes cause it was a small independent 100 person church (but among the youth leaders and staff at a different church i went to there was definitely a fashion, almost a uniform for the elites) seems like people who take their faith seriously end up on the path to losing it. I really took my beliefs seriously and it made me miserable. I wonder if these Christians have found some kind of sweet spot, where on either side your too lazy to believe/have a faith or too involved/honest to maintain belief/have faith anymore. as a long term pattern, I have noticed that young long haired drummers with tattoos do not hold leadership roles. there is a correlation of financial success or business ownership and who (or who's wives) holds the leadership jobs. If you don't fit their mold your only good as a sheep -to stay down and dumb while providing a generous portion of your income for the privilege of being served by your pastors. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
themonkeyman Posted April 24, 2015 Share Posted April 24, 2015 SCM that's so true - They only care about themselves Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RenaissanceWoman Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 ...seems like people who take their faith seriously end up on the path to losing it. I really took my beliefs seriously and it made me miserable... Yes, yes, yes. Glad to know I'm not the only one. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
sparklingphoenix Posted May 8, 2015 Share Posted May 8, 2015 I always took my faith really seriously too, but the fake kids who pretended to be so spiritual but were full of shit always got praised. They were those kids who made a show of their "faith" and got lots of attention on the big stage. Then there was me, the outcast, the unpopular one always on the fringe of the social circle in youth group. I fucking hated youth group. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SCM Posted May 10, 2015 Share Posted May 10, 2015 Eh, maybe there was a verse in the bible that all of us on this site missed that went something like: --and then jesus said, "follow me and my teaching, but not like, too hard.--- Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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