Sybaris Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 I have an old friend whose daughter was in a car accident a couple weeks ago. She's in a coma, brain swelled, kidneys shut down and various other injuries. It's awful to see him go through this. Almost every day he posts something on Facebook about her condition and asks for prayers. I've never paid much attention to people on FB who throw out the prayer requests but this one got me thinking. How could anyone not see the futility? To the former believers........... did you think that there was some threshold, some critical mass or some measure of prayer persistence that would incite your god to act on the prayer? I mean what's this god waiting for, the right person to make the prayer? A dramatic cue? Seems to me that people would get the hint that in spite of all these prayers over the past two weeks she's gotten worse and their god either doesn't care, is not involved or doesn't exist. But I know, I know.................. if she pulls through whether it be next week, next month or next year..................... prayer did it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
duderonomy Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 Sybaris, I'm sorry about your friend's daughter. I have a couple of cynical, snarky responses (not to you. to the prayer thing), but I'll spare you. In my day, it varied. Some said pray, and "see if it be God's will", but of course that's silly. While I was praying along those lines that if it was already God's will, why was I praying? Later came the Penecostal church, and the Word of Faith movement. Sometimes I just didn't have enough faith, or God saw the bigger picture, and that's why my prayers didn't work out. It said in the Bible that they would, but I must have misunderstood the Bible. As my own mom lay dying in a hospital, I prayed. I didn't do the "give the doctors wisdom" thing. They were doctors. They already were smart and knew what to do. I just told God that I believed he would take care of her when she got there, if that be his will. Again his will. I could spill my guts over this, but to keep a long story short, I think there is some kind of mental system in place in Christians that isn't exclusive to Christianity. I think we as humans try our best with what we know at the time and keep retreating if we have to to smaller and smaller safe places until there aren't any safe places anymore, so we mentally make our own places, and that's where religion and justification comes from, but that's just my humble opinion. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 Now that I am on the outside I can finally see that this whole prayer thing is a coping mechanism. Christians are actually powerless. But in order to help themselves accept the events in life they go through this prayer ritual. They desperately pray and try their best to trust God. Then after the event is over and the conflict resolved they try to convince themselves that God had the perfect plan no matter how it turned out. And if somebody died they have the whole Heaven game to run through in which they try to convince themselves that the loss is a good thing. It may not be healthy but it is a coping mechanism. 3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
midniterider Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 I think we all wanted God to do something when we prayed but we sorta didnt really expect much. We would never admit that though. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Furball Posted September 26, 2015 Share Posted September 26, 2015 If god really existed and was intimately involved in this girl's life (as christians arrogantly claim he is in all our lives), he never would have allowed this to happen in the first place. I understand though, we live in an uncertain world that religion claims it can explain away. Then when the unexplainable happens people don't know what to do, so they do as the religionists instruct them to do, pray about it. Yes praying is futile and has been proven throughout all ages to be a hoax, but in horrible times like these, praying to what you hope exists....a loving caring deity can bring a sense comfort, albeit a false one. Her father is only doing what his preacher brainwashed him to do, 'pray about it.' I hope she makes a full recovery. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Castiel233 Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 If praying truly worked , the world would be a very , very different place, no need for hospitals , nor any medicine........a quick magic thought to the stars and all illness cured........ But pray does not work, leaving the believer in the position of making excuses as to why their religion does not conform to reality Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ellinas Posted September 27, 2015 Share Posted September 27, 2015 In all honesty, whilst I am as fed up as the next with the way Christians attribute anything they like to god and anything they don't to their own failings, I'm not going to criticize the man under these circumstances. If he can do nothing, asking for prayer at least gives him some comforting illusion. No-one will think straight in that situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sybaris Posted September 30, 2015 Author Share Posted September 30, 2015 So a couple days ago he posted on FB that his daughter was showing improvement and that the prayers were working. Today he posted that she has taken a turn for the worse and to pray more. Each time he posts there's always 50+ replies with "prayers" or "prayers to you and daughter" Aside from his own state of mind it's intriguing to watch the lemmings play along with this god driven prayer contest. If the prayers were working it is only evidence of deep seeded disonance to even suggest that continued or more prayer would improve a slump. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
francesco Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 people want hope no matter how small..... or how fake it is...... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mymistake Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 God is like Martin Shkreli. You thought I would save you from cancer if you get 50 prayers? Well, I raised the price to 500,000 prayers. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest CutiePie Posted October 4, 2015 Share Posted October 4, 2015 Another question this brings up is person A is in a coma, prayers are happening and they get healed. Person B is also in a coma, not healed and end up dying....?! God favoring one person over the other? Either way, I'm very sorry your friend is dealing with all of this, good vibes to him and his family. <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lilith666 Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 I'm sorry to hear that. I hope she will recover. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Burny Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 What humans (all of us) are trying to avoid, is the fact that there is *no hope* in the end, for ANY of us. The universe doesn't care what happens to us, or how we suffer and eventually, die. This is patently obvious to anyone who pays attention to historical or current global events, but yet we *all* desperately seek a way to avoid this harsh truth. The sad part for me in all this desperation, is that instead of wasting our time praying or doing the million other things people do to distract themselves from reality, we could just hug, or hold hands, or have a celebration of life and go through these tough times, TOGETHER, as a human race, rather than DIVIDED as different religions / beliefs. I am so tired of the infantile way humans deal with our reality, I hope for my kids at least that the human race will grow up some day, but I think that's a long ways off yet. I am truly sorry for your friend's suffering. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluechipx Posted October 5, 2015 Share Posted October 5, 2015 The more I think about someone saying they will pray for you the clearer I see what is really going on, the person somehow feels that they are better buddies with the most powerful being in the universe than you are. It's like saying 'I'll put a word in to the boss for you' because we are on a first name basis. Bull crap! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sybaris Posted October 5, 2015 Author Share Posted October 5, 2015 It's over. She's not responding to anything. Actually she never was. My friend was confusing reflexes with improvement. Essentially she's been dead since the accident. They are now waiting on donor recipients to match. So now the prayers have shifted from the daughter to the father and healing his grief. I wonder how many would be praying if it became public knowledge that she was drunk at the time of the accident. I'd like to see how many "true Christians" would stick around for that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jeff Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 Poor man. He can't even deal with his grief properly as he now pretends that she's happy in a better place and he will see her soon. This will cause him to suffer as he will struggle to believe that idea and can't dare question it even though he deep down knows its pretend. My grandmother has lost her mind over the grief she feels for my mother who is in "heaven". She doesn't really believe it and yet she's fundamental in her beliefs. So sad in several ways. To lose a daughter... I can't imagine losing one of mine. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted October 6, 2015 Share Posted October 6, 2015 I'm sorry to hear that she died; how horrible for her father and the family. I never understood prayer. We were promised as xians that we could do the same works, and even more, that Jesus did if we prayed, but that's not true. And "if two or more are gathered in his name" blahblah, again, not true. I don't get the concept of sending up lots of prayers, if jesus promised that one believer could pray and get an answer. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sybaris Posted October 6, 2015 Author Share Posted October 6, 2015 Poor man. He can't even deal with his grief properly as he now pretends that she's happy in a better place and he will see her soon. This will cause him to suffer as he will struggle to believe that idea and can't dare question it even though he deep down knows its pretend. My grandmother has lost her mind over the grief she feels for my mother who is in "heaven". She doesn't really believe it and yet she's fundamental in her beliefs. So sad in several ways. To lose a daughter... I can't imagine losing one of mine. Funny you should bring up seeing them again. My wife and I were discussing prayer and our friends grief over losing his daughter. I reminded my wife what I thought of prayer, heaven and how different people subscribe to what gives them comfort whether it's true or not. She promptly asked me not to blow her anticipation of seeing her mother again in heaven. She passed when my wife was 11 and will repeat what her dad told her after her mom died............... "God needed another angel". Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yunea Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Very sorry to hear about this. When my brother died, I had no doubts whatsoever that he was safely with God, free of all the disabilities and difficulties he had, possibly seeing old friends and relatives. I honestly don't know how it'd have been like for me if I hadn't thought so; his death wrecked my already burnt-out self really bad. I guess it prolonged things because it was like having cushion pads all over the truth of the situation. Also it definitely made me more vulnerable to all kinds of woo. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tsathoggua Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 Now that I am on the outside I can finally see that this whole prayer thing is a coping mechanism. Christians are actually powerless. But in order to help themselves accept the events in life they go through this prayer ritual. They desperately pray and try their best to trust God. Then after the event is over and the conflict resolved they try to convince themselves that God had the perfect plan no matter how it turned out. And if somebody died they have the whole Heaven game to run through in which they try to convince themselves that the loss is a good thing. It may not be healthy but it is a coping mechanism. Yeah, I think you nailed it perfectly -- "coping mechanism"! Brilliant! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
♦ ficino ♦ Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 This is very sad. How terrible for the girl to die young and for the parents to cope now with their loss. The "God needed another angel" thing is so obviously false it borders on the obscene. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted October 7, 2015 Share Posted October 7, 2015 The "God needed another angel" thing is so obviously false it borders on the obscene. This is false even by xian standards. Angels are not people that have died. In the bible, angels are specific beings created by god to flesh out the fairy tale. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Lucy Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Sorry to hear about this. When I was a Christian, I thought that god was going to do whatever he originally intended to do. I thought I was supposed to pray about it just because god wanted me to pray about it. I did believe that god had control in the physical world. I just didn't believe my prayers would affect the outcome. So your prayers are more like a test to see if you still turn to god. God is going to do bad things sometimes just to see if you pray about it. My family believed in prayer. But they believed in absolute trust of god for prayer to work. They would say the reason prayer didn't work in this case is because she was in a hospital. If they really trusted god they should have removed life support and stood around her praying. When your prayers fail, it's because you didn't believe enough. Or else your desires went against god's plan and it's really better he didn't answer your prayer. I went to a funeral for a little girl that died in a car accident very recently. Everybody kept saying there that god took her because her mission on earth was complete. Her mission on earth was apparently to fill up a funeral home with all the people that she knew. Yes, the preacher actually said that. She was too beautiful for the earth. God needed another angel. And the preacher gave a long speech about how god always makes the best decisions for us all. If you could see what was coming, you would have chosen for her to die like this too. We should be envious of her! She's with Jesus right now! This is a happy day! My friend said after the funeral, "I must be a bad Christian because I see nothing happy about this." 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
amateur Posted October 8, 2015 Share Posted October 8, 2015 Lucy, what you wrote above is so depressing. I'm so sorry the little girl died and I agree that her "mission" was not to die young and fill up a funeral home. I hate hearing stuff like that. It's one thing if someone is 95 and even us atheists agree that they lived a long and full life and left a good legacy, but kids? No, never. Like your friend said, there is nothing happy about that. Ever. As a parent, it's my worst nightmare. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sybaris Posted October 8, 2015 Author Share Posted October 8, 2015 I went to a funeral for a little girl that died in a car accident very recently. Everybody kept saying there that god took her because her mission on earth was complete. Her mission on earth was apparently to fill up a funeral home with all the people that she knew. Yes, the preacher actually said that. She was too beautiful for the earth. God needed another angel. And the preacher gave a long speech about how god always makes the best decisions for us all. If you could see what was coming, you would have chosen for her to die like this too. We should be envious of her! She's with Jesus right now! This is a happy day! My friend said after the funeral, "I must be a bad Christian because I see nothing happy about this." That is disgusting Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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