Schism Erupts In Pastafarianism Over The Acceptability Of Plastic Colanders

[Fweethawt]

Wow... Leave it up to Mutha Russia to take the fun out of things. Bet christians will be pushing for a law like this here in the states.

 

'Pastafarian' will lose his licence if caught driving without a colander on his head -- https://au.news.yahoo.com/viral/a/30583354/pastafarian-will-lose-his-licence-if-caught-driving-without-a-colander-on-his-head/?cmp=fb

[TheOutsider]

Wow... Leave it up to Mutha Russia to take the fun out of things. Bet christians will be pushing for a law like this here in the states.

 

'Pastafarian' will lose his licence if caught driving without a colander on his head -- https://au.news.yahoo.com/viral/a/30583354/pastafarian-will-lose-his-licence-if-caught-driving-without-a-colander-on-his-head/?cmp=fb

 

Now that's just bullshit. Do Christians have to be wearing a cross shaped foam hat at all times too? No? Didn't fucking think so. Goddamn assholes! ;p

 

That is a snazzy knit colander hat though...

[BarbarousBill]

I'm part of the Pastafarian sect called the Hookerites. We believe there was a translation error in the holy works and the stripper factory of heaven is actually a hooker factory.

[disillusioned]

I'm part of the Pastafarian sect called the Hookerites. We believe there was a translation error in the holy works and the stripper factory of heaven is actually a hooker factory.

 

The two are not mutually exclusive...

[BarbarousBill]

 

I'm part of the Pastafarian sect called the Hookerites. We believe there was a translation error in the holy works and the stripper factory of heaven is actually a hooker factory.

 

The two are not mutually exclusive...

 

No, but we believe that FSM in His Holy Noodly Appendage would grant an all-the-way form of entertainment and wish fulfillment, with the believer having such discretion to choose what to do once there. Hookerites demand orthodoxy! Plus strippers are a tease!

[duderonomy]

I don't know where this is going to go between Disillusioned and BB, but I have to come down on the side of the prophet on this one.

 

Besides, pastor Al Dente at the church I used to attend (The First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster; Reformed.  B.F.E. Synod) warned us against those who would claim that there were errors in the received holy works. He said it could lead to all kinds of private interpretations. 

[TheOutsider]

I don't know where this is going to go between Disillusioned and BB, but I have to come down on the side of the prophet on this one.

 

Besides, pastor Al Dente at the church I used to attend (The First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster; Reformed.  B.F.E. Synod) warned us against those who would claim that there were errors in the received holy works. He said it could lead to all kinds of private interpretations. 

 

It's a potential translation error, which means we would have fucked it up, not the FSM. Besides, it's just minor details here, practically the difference between metal colanders and plastic ones for official head wear. Or those plastic red cups or actual glass mugs/whatever other container you prefer for the Holy Nectar in Pastafarian heaven.

 

Oops... I just started another controversy didn't I? ;p

[duderonomy]

 

I don't know where this is going to go between Disillusioned and BB, but I have to come down on the side of the prophet on this one.

 

Besides, pastor Al Dente at the church I used to attend (The First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster; Reformed.  B.F.E. Synod) warned us against those who would claim that there were errors in the received holy works. He said it could lead to all kinds of private interpretations. 

 

It's a potential translation error, which means we would have fucked it up, not the FSM. Besides, it's just minor details here, practically the difference between metal colanders and plastic ones for official head wear. Or those plastic red cups or actual glass mugs/whatever other container you prefer for the Holy Nectar in Pastafarian heaven.

 

Oops... I just started another controversy didn't I? ;p

 

 

We were also taught to look out for you Laodicean types. The Holy Prophet of the FSM is on this very thread and he will deal with you.

[TheOutsider]

 

 

I don't know where this is going to go between Disillusioned and BB, but I have to come down on the side of the prophet on this one.

 

Besides, pastor Al Dente at the church I used to attend (The First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster; Reformed.  B.F.E. Synod) warned us against those who would claim that there were errors in the received holy works. He said it could lead to all kinds of private interpretations. 

 

It's a potential translation error, which means we would have fucked it up, not the FSM. Besides, it's just minor details here, practically the difference between metal colanders and plastic ones for official head wear. Or those plastic red cups or actual glass mugs/whatever other container you prefer for the Holy Nectar in Pastafarian heaven.

 

Oops... I just started another controversy didn't I? ;p

 

 

We were also taught to look out for you Laodicean types. The Holy Prophet of the FSM is on this very thread and he will deal with you.

 

 

Eh, I wouldn't call myself Laodicean. Jocose, perhaps blithe, or sanguine even, but hardly Laodicean... It's okay though, I still like you.

[BarbarousBill]

 

 

 

I don't know where this is going to go between Disillusioned and BB, but I have to come down on the side of the prophet on this one.

 

Besides, pastor Al Dente at the church I used to attend (The First Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster; Reformed.  B.F.E. Synod) warned us against those who would claim that there were errors in the received holy works. He said it could lead to all kinds of private interpretations. 

 

It's a potential translation error, which means we would have fucked it up, not the FSM. Besides, it's just minor details here, practically the difference between metal colanders and plastic ones for official head wear. Or those plastic red cups or actual glass mugs/whatever other container you prefer for the Holy Nectar in Pastafarian heaven.

 

Oops... I just started another controversy didn't I? ;p

 

 

We were also taught to look out for you Laodicean types. The Holy Prophet of the FSM is on this very thread and he will deal with you.

 

 

Eh, I wouldn't call myself Laodicean. Jocose, perhaps blithe, or sanguine even, but hardly Laodicean... It's okay though, I still like you.

 

And I still like hookers.

 

YAY Acceptance!  

[disillusioned]

 

 

I'm part of the Pastafarian sect called the Hookerites. We believe there was a translation error in the holy works and the stripper factory of heaven is actually a hooker factory.

 

The two are not mutually exclusive...

 

No, but we believe that FSM in His Holy Noodly Appendage would grant an all-the-way form of entertainment and wish fulfillment, with the believer having such discretion to choose what to do once there. Hookerites demand orthodoxy! Plus strippers are a tease!

 

 

Believe what you will, but don't call it holy writ.

 

Also, some of us like to be teased.

[Jeff]

Why not both?

[BarbarousBill]

Why not both?

Heathenry! Blasphemy!

[midniterider]

This Pastafarian just schooled Georgia officials for refusing to respect his spaghetti-worshipping religion -- http://www.rawstory.com/2016/01/this-pastafarian-just-schooled-georgia-officials-for-refusing-to-respect-his-spaghetti-worshipping-religion/

 

I like the pastafarian's comparison of various religious absurdities.

 

Pastafarianism as “not a religion” but instead a “philosophy that mocks religion.”  Ancient well-established bullshit is respected. Bullshit invented in 2005 is not to be respected. 

 

I think there is a call now for every pastafarian to mail a collander to the head of motor vehicles in Georgia. 

[Fweethawt]

CHURCH OF THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER TRAFFIC SIGNS -- http://www.atlasobscura.com/places/church-of-the-flying-spaghetti-monster-traffic-signs?ct=t%28Newsletter_2_4_20162_3_2016%29&mc_cid=f4fb8f53a8&mc_eid=1f59a53182

[florduh]

We are all brothers and sisters of the Holy Pasta; saints, if you will. Let us all come together in the sacred sauces and cheeses. And why beholdest thou the rotini that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the rigatoni that is in thine own eye? Peace and Pasta, brothers and sisters and praise be the Flying Spaghetti Monster (pbuh)¹.

 

¹ Parmesan Be Upon Him

[duderonomy]

We are all brothers and sisters of the Holy Pasta; saints, if you will. Let us all come together in the sacred sauces and cheeses. And why beholdest thou the rotini that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the rigatoni that is in thine own eye? Peace and Pasta, brothers and sisters and praise be the Flying Spaghetti Monster (pbuh)¹.

 

¹ Parmesan Be Upon Him

 

Fine, Florduh.

That sounds good and everything, but until the day that we all throw the colanders we've earned at the feet of the Flying Spaghetti Monster in Heaven, the metal colander people are better than the plastic colander people. Preach peace all you want, but everyone can see the truth.

[Fweethawt]

This man's wife was visited by the FSM while she was doing the dishes.

 

 

Could this mean that it is His Will™ that a woman's place really IS in the kitchen?

 

And so, Pastafarianism, like any other major religion, starts its dark and sinister slide into misogyny...

[Fweethawt]

Atlanta Pastafarian told she can’t have license photo with colander -- http://m.ajc.com/news/news/local-govt-politics/atlanta-pastafarian-told-she-cant-have-license-pho/nqX5c/

[Fweethawt]

Well this is a slippery fucking slope if I ever saw one...

 

Weddings legalised for Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster in New Zealand -- http://mobile.abc.net.au/news/2016-03-01/weddings-legalised-for-church-of-the-flying-spaghetti-monster/7208662

[Jeff]

Yay now Italian restaurants won't be able to charge tax! We are legit!

[Fweethawt]

Yay now Italian restaurants won't be able to charge tax! We are legit!

Take the idea from the Jews and tax all non-pastafarians.

[Fweethawt]

Sorry, folks,but according to this court, Pastafarianism can't be a religion because -- get this -- it's fictional!

 

 

Court to spaghetti: You are not a god -- http://www.religionnews.com/2016/04/13/court-to-pastafarian-you-are-not-a-god/

[duderonomy]

Sorry, folks,but according to this court, Pastafarianism can't be a religion because -- get this -- it's fictional!

 

 

Court to spaghetti: You are not a god -- http://www.religionnews.com/2016/04/13/court-to-pastafarian-you-are-not-a-god/

 

I'm calling bullshit on you and your article. You are a known anti-FSM. You went out from among us because you were never a part of us.

 

We don't need to read your articles and we don't need to follow your links. The FSM gives us rights that no court can take away.

[Fweethawt]

His Holy Sauciness wishing M'urica a happy Independence Day!