directionless Posted November 26, 2015 Author Share Posted November 26, 2015 I was raised in the cult of the Southern Baptist, family was heavily involved for MANY generations. I know many who would leave but they feel they need to believe in something other than themselves or they think they cannot give their children a moral role model to follow other than what religion provides. Many church members are pathetic in their understanding of themselves. They hopelessly follow the church doctrine we are born in sin and are doomed without Jesus, no matter what they believe about the religion. They have no faith in themselves.That probably explains why some fundamentalists on forums can seem to unreasonable. They have too much invested to even contemplate leaving Christianity. They can't afford to look at it honestly. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
directionless Posted November 26, 2015 Author Share Posted November 26, 2015 Some people may feel that too much in their lives is out of control and unjust, so they need to believe in a God that is in control and just. This is true of me. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dichotomy Posted November 26, 2015 Share Posted November 26, 2015 Answering first before I read everyone else's comments sorry... Things that made deconversion hard: 1) I'd invested so much of my life and energy (physical, mental, emotional) into Christianity that the idea that it may not be true was awful as that meant I'd wasted all those years. 2) I had a shit dad and desperately clung to the concept of a loving father in heaven. 3) this worldview was all I'd ever known and it gave me a clear security and purpose and direction for my life in this world. 4) all my family, friends and community were Christians. Things that made it easy: 1) the ridiculousness that is church. It has so many flaws, so much authoritative Bullshit that it made me angry and challenge things and start down the path of questioning why we did and believed what we did. 2) biblical inconsistencies, well just bible study and theology in general pulls itself a part when you look at it closely. 3) the fact my husband was also deconverting Your observation about your dad is similar to the theories described by @Alien in post #11. Thanks for drawing that to my attention, even though I thought I read the comments afterwards I missed Alien's post. Yes that is indeed very much what kept me in christianity and a main part that I miss. That feeling of belonging to a bigger family with someone who cares. Obviously I recognise that that "care" is false and futile but the longing was there for an awful long time. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moderator Margee Posted November 27, 2015 Moderator Share Posted November 27, 2015 Some people may feel that too much in their lives is out of control and unjust, so they need to believe in a God that is in control and just. This is true of me. This would be me also directionless. I found it sooooo scary to be on my own...but then again, as EX-c has already reminded me a thousand times...it was always just me anyway. So now, I just have to carry on and make the very best out of every situation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dichotomy Posted November 28, 2015 Share Posted November 28, 2015 Some people may feel that too much in their lives is out of control and unjust, so they need to believe in a God that is in control and just. This is true of me. This would be me also directionless. I found it sooooo scary to be on my own...but then again, as EX-c has already reminded me a thousand times...it was always just me anyway. So now, I just have to carry on and make the very best out of every situation. Yes this is probably true for many. I guess that for some the "belief" or "hope" that there is someone out there looking over them is enough, but like you Margee, the realisation that I was on my own *anyway* and that my circumstances are no different other than now I have a true awareness of my reality is better not worse. Sometimes it *feels* worse, but surely having more information better equips us :-) 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Moxie Posted December 1, 2015 Share Posted December 1, 2015 <font color="#8A084B"> Good topic. For me it was the security that the church offered. When there was death in my family, when I was homeless, the church was there as a safety net. I still feel tempted to join a church just to have that kind of safety net. I'm slowly coming to terms with the fact that religion and safety do not have to be linked.</font> 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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