Struggling To Find A Way Back To God

[Guest]

I used to be a positive person. But I have been through a lot of trauma. As a result of what happened and my own way of dealing with that, I got extremely terrified, angry and even delusional. I didn't dare to trust anyone anymore. Not myself, not others, not God. I came to see God as some sort of nasty psychopath who joyfully kills masses of people and sends them to hell to torture them for eternity. Like others seem to read only the peaceful parts of the bible, I only saw the scary parts. And at the same time I felt really guilty about feeling like that. I think my view of God represented not how God really is, but how I myself had become...negative, scared, angry and distrustful.

 

I don't necessarily want to return to church, and I'm not sure in which form this can come, but I do want to feel connected to a God that is loving and trustworthy again.

 

Did anyone find the way back to a loving God, after becoming desillusioned by the "angry-hell-god" some preach?

 

I'm not sure whether this is the forum for it... but I was just wondering.

 

[rjn]

I understand how you feel, I think a lot of us do. If you feel like retaining some semblance of spirituality in your life, I say, by all means, do so, if that is what you really want. The only recommendation I really have is that you should be wary of simple answers and acting out of desperation. I also think accepting the fact that we can't really be absolutely sure about anything is a good start. I find that thought to be quite liberating to be honest, but maybe that's just me? I guess that's a very "Agnostic" way of looking at it... hell, it might even be the definition of agnosticism, and that's fine by me.

[ironhorse]

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.

I use other translations of scripture when I am studying a book or passage, but in general use I really like The Message translation.

 

A good site:

 

https://www.biblegateway.com/

[Shinzon]

Put it blunty, fuck the idea of god. The world is enough you just have to find what your looking for in my view.

[rjn]

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.

I use other translations of scripture when I am studying a book or passage, but in general use I really like The Message translation.

 

A good site:

 

https://www.biblegateway.com/

 

While your at it, why not read some wholesome and moral stuff like Deuteronomy 20:10-20? Or the family-friendly Psalm 137:9? What about the nice family values being proclaimed in Genesis 19:30-36? The entire Book of Revelations is great fun too!

[Burny]

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.

 

I use other translations of scripture when I am studying a book or passage, but in general use I really like The Message translation.

 

A good site:

 

https://www.biblegateway.com/

Yeah - start with the most fantastical and least likely to be based on reality gospel!

 

My advice? Forget anyone telling you what is or isn't real and start with the simple truth that nobody really knows. There is great freedom in truly believing that. There are lots of holy books and holy men from many different religions who will tell you that they, and they alone, have heard from "god". They are all lying. Trying to make sense out of nonsensical crap will drive you crazy.

 

Study philosophy. Learn about social structures and how we evolved as social animals. Learn cognitive science and read books about how our minds lie to us all the time. And take everything, including science, with a giant grain of salt! Then go out with friends and family and simply enjoy life for what it is - a brief flirtation with time and consciousness.

[bornagainathiest]

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.

I use other translations of scripture when I am studying a book or passage, but in general use I really like The Message translation.

 

A good site:

 

https://www.biblegateway.com/

 

Before you take Ironhorse's advice Marian, get him to explain to you where the sin that Jesus (supposedly) set us free from, originated from.

 

I've asked him to do so here... http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/74125-the-simplicity-of-the-christian-message/page-2#.WAEvePkrJD8...in post # 21.

 

You see, the gospels are meaningless unless what is written in Genesis is true.

 

And Ironhorse accepts that Genesis is true ...by faith, not by historical fact or evidence.

 

So by telling you to go to the gospels, he's trying to sell sell you a house that's built on the quicksand of Genesis.

 

Would you really buy a house with foundations made of shifting sand?

 

 

Thanks,

 

BAA. 

[florduh]

Just make up your own god and assign it the characteristics you like. That's what everybody else who has a god has done.

[Guest Furball]

I used to be a positive person. But I have been through a lot of trauma. As a result of what happened and my own way of dealing with that, I got extremely terrified, angry and even delusional. I didn't dare to trust anyone anymore. Not myself, not others, not God. I came to see God as some sort of nasty psychopath who joyfully kills masses of people and sends them to hell to torture them for eternity. Like others seem to read only the peaceful parts of the bible, I only saw the scary parts. And at the same time I felt really guilty about feeling like that. I think my view of God represented not how God really is, but how I myself had become...negative, scared, angry and distrustful.

 

I don't necessarily want to return to church, and I'm not sure in which form this can come, but I do want to feel connected to a God that is loving and trustworthy again.

 

Did anyone find the way back to a loving God, after becoming desillusioned by the "angry-hell-god" some preach?

 

I'm not sure whether this is the forum for it... but I was just wondering.

Hi Marian. If you want to still believe in a god that isn't a psychopathic murderer like the god found in the new testament gospels, there are other, more loving and benign gods to believe in like the god of Neale Donald Walsch. He wrote a book called conversations with god, which puts forth a much kinder and non judgmental god. While I personally don't believe in any god(s), if you are still trying to believe in one, try his. When coming out of the jesus hate/death cult, it's typical for people to still want to have something to believe in, so I know what you're going through. In time you will find that you won't need a god to believe in at all because they are all myths and are all irrelevant to life anyways. The new age gods like the one mr. walsch created, are much nicer than the cosmic murderer/torturer of the gospels. Good luck to you, and welcome to ex-c. 

[L.B.]

Marian, if you want to feel connected, it's easy.

 

Feel connected to the natural world - you depend on it, and are also a vital part of it.

 

As corny as it sounds, the "circle of life" or symbiotic relationship between living things is deep, powerful and bordering on the magical

when you realize that the world has changed in massive, major ways - and we as a species have benefited from it when we haven't been screwing it up.

 

Feel connected to others - go find ways to serve the needs of those who are less fortunate. Sit with someone who is lonely. Bring a meal to a single person

and enjoy it with them,

 

Organize a party around an activity you enjoy.

 

It's the HERE AND NOW that is what moves us - the things you THOUGHT you felt from a God were things you desperately wanted to feel from other people - you were just taught not to trust others. You were taught to mistrust yourself and your motives, and to not really open up to people unless they believed like you did. The problem always was, of course, that you were all "sinners" and so couldn't ultimately be trusted to care for each other, now, could you?

 

In all the frustrations you've faced, you became angry and judgmental because you saw "god" being that way, and vice versa.

 

Get rid of the authoritative sky deities. There are none.

 

Go out and fall in love with what you CAN see, hear, touch, taste, smell, etc.

 

I said it to others and I will say it to you: the world is SO MUCH BIGGER than you have ever experienced, and yet you're ready to get pissed off because a tiny little percentage of people - who don't even represent one percent of the total number of religious adherents of any kind on earth) have failed to make a mythical god-experience more meaningful to you.

 

Screw that. Go out into the REST of the world and see what it has to offer that doesn't require what biblegod and his idiot minions have demanded.

 

All the best in your journeying.

[Guest Furball]

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.

 

Did you read her post? She is trying get away from the psychopathic god of the gospels. So why are you trying to send her back to them? 

[older]

Marian:

 

L.B. has given you some good advice above. On a day that is special to you, get up before dawn and go to a quiet place away from civilization, with a view of the eastern horizon. Go with the notion that the sunrise is going to be the beginning of something new for you. Fill your lungs with the morning air and listen to the silence around you. I'll bet you'll find the connection you're looking for. Here's something I've posted elsewhere on this forum:

What is life? It is the flash of a firefly in the night. It is the breath of a buffalo in the winter time. It is the little shadow which runs across the grass and loses itself in the sunset. — Crowfoot, a Blackfoot chief

[Geezer]

Since God only exists in the mind of a believer, that allows the believer to create any kind of God they want & to modify their God to conform with their evolving beliefs.

[Vigile]

Some seem to have deconverted from xianity, but not the idea of god. I'm not trying to sell atheism, but I'm not entirely convinced that humans need to believe in magic to make it through their day. It's just a matter of perception. The idea of a god may be painful to let go of for some, but once it's done, I suspect most wonder why they ever thought they needed it just like all of us here look back and wonder what it is we ever saw in xianity. 

[TABA]

Marian,

 

You have received advice here that is suitable for different people at different places in their lives. With the exception of Ironhorse, we have all rejected Christianity and have moved away from theism to varying degrees. I think your health and happiness probably lie in following this journey but only as far and as fast as works for you. Those of us who have reached atheism can easily underestimate the need others still feel for some kind of god in their lives.

 

I don't think it's a good idea for anybody who has seen the many problems with Christianity (or Islam or Judaism) to try to go back. It takes too much suspension of your disbelief to be a firm foundation on which to build your life. It really is a house built upon sand!

 

I think you would do well to follow Furball's advice and explore the concept of a God described by Neale Donald Walsh. This kind of spirituality may be a lifelong home for you, but it may also be a waystation to a place where, like me today, you feel no need for any deity. But it's your life and your journey. I think all us ex-Christians agree that it should be a one-way journey at whatever pace makes sense for you.

 

I really wish you the best, Marian. You will find plenty of encouragement and support here! Stay in touch...

[LogicalFallacy]

Hi Marian,

 

I agree with what Thereandbackagain wrote above. 

 

For you to go back, you either have had to accepted the bible as true, and no longer have an issue with it, or you have had to bury what you know behind mental walls. In the first instance I'd say you could go back, but wouldn't recommend it. In the second instance going back would just cause mental and emotional conflicts... maybe not at first, but in time.

 

To get an idea of an all loving God you have to look in places other than the Bible. If you need to do this, then as others say explore other options. But only believe something because you believe it is true, not because you are forced to or want it to be true. 

 

All the best

 

LF

[midniterider]

Just make up your own god and assign it the characteristics you like. That's what everybody else who has a god has done.

 

There you have it. Ignore the church, ignore other people's beliefs, ignore holy books. Roll your own belief system. If you feel you really want one.

[Voice]

Marian, if you want to feel connected, it's easy.

 

Feel connected to the natural world - you depend on it, and are also a vital part of it.

 

As corny as it sounds, the "circle of life" or symbiotic relationship between living things is deep, powerful and bordering on the magical

when you realize that the world has changed in massive, major ways - and we as a species have benefited from it when we haven't been screwing it up.

 

Feel connected to others - go find ways to serve the needs of those who are less fortunate. Sit with someone who is lonely. Bring a meal to a single person

and enjoy it with them,

 

Organize a party around an activity you enjoy.

 

It's the HERE AND NOW that is what moves us - the things you THOUGHT you felt from a God were things you desperately wanted to feel from other people - you were just taught not to trust others. You were taught to mistrust yourself and your motives, and to not really open up to people unless they believed like you did. The problem always was, of course, that you were all "sinners" and so couldn't ultimately be trusted to care for each other, now, could you?

 

In all the frustrations you've faced, you became angry and judgmental because you saw "god" being that way, and vice versa.

 

Get rid of the authoritative sky deities. There are none.

 

Go out and fall in love with what you CAN see, hear, touch, taste, smell, etc.

 

I said it to others and I will say it to you: the world is SO MUCH BIGGER than you have ever experienced, and yet you're ready to get pissed off because a tiny little percentage of people - who don't even represent one percent of the total number of religious adherents of any kind on earth) have failed to make a mythical god-experience more meaningful to you.

 

Screw that. Go out into the REST of the world and see what it has to offer that doesn't require what biblegod and his idiot minions have demanded.

 

All the best in your journeying.

 

I resonate with this.

At the risk of saying something really cliche and stupid, I won't wreck it by trying to add to it. 

 

The idea of one-sided forces of pure good or raw evil doesn't readily manifest in nature, at least not that I've observed. Forces of nature are in balance. That's what I've always liked about the yin-yang philosophy. Doesn't mean I won't stop thinking I'd be better off dead when I'm depressed or overcome, it just is what it is.

I trust that things will probably stay in balance with or without me. I think of myself as an active observer.

 

People are really fucked up though, what people do to each other. It's disturbing. When I compare that to the rest of what happens in the natural environment, I wonder if maybe there is a force of evil, exclusive to humans. Maybe I'm just too close to it.

[ironhorse]

Did you read her post? She is trying get away from the psychopathic god of the gospels. So why are you trying to send her back to them?

~ Furball

 

Yes, I read her post. She did not specifically mention “The Gospels” as a scary part of the scriptures. She may view them in that manner, I don’t know. She evidently has read the sections that have been scary and troubling to her.

 

I agree there are passages where God is judging people directly or allowing some really bad stuff to happen. I understand some of the reasons these events occurred  but not all of them.

 

I just suggested she might want to read The Gospels and eve find a translation she liked that might help in her readings.

 

“Did anyone find the way back to a loving God, after becoming disillusioned by the "angry-hell-god" some preach?”
~Marian

 

I was just answering her question just as others have posted their thoughts.

 

I wish her well in her pursuit.

[Thumbelina]

 

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.

I use other translations of scripture when I am studying a book or passage, but in general use I really like The Message translation.

 

A good site:

 

https://www.biblegateway.com/

 

While your at it, why not read some wholesome and moral stuff like Deuteronomy 20:10-20? Or the family-friendly Psalm 137:9? What about the nice family values being proclaimed in Genesis 19:30-36? The entire Book of Revelations is great fun too!

 

 

Why do skeptics use DESCRIPTIVE passages in the bible & make it PRESCRIPTIVE?

Does the Foxes' Book of Martyrs DESCRIBE what happened in history or does it PRESCRIBE the bad behavior of rebellious humans?

Do the historical accounts of dictators DESCRIBE what happened or PRESCRIBE the horrors that were done?

 

Also, God has an expressed will & a permissive will ( He allows sentient beings to rebel or have subpar standards & He works with it- polygamy, slavery, war, angry venting like in the imprecatory psalms, blaspheming atheists discussing Him etc.).

[florduh]

Hey Thumby! Good to see you again!

[Thumbelina]

Since God only exists in the mind of a believer, that allows the believer to create any kind of God they want & to modify their God to conform with their evolving beliefs.

So what or who is your God then?

You don't believe in anything?

[Thumbelina]

Hey Thumby! Good to see you again!

I was thinking the same about you

[Thumbelina]

I'm highly sensitive & I'm looking into post-traumatic growth. I mainly use bible promises to do it.

[Shinzon]

 

 

As a believer in Christ, I suggest reading the four Gospels. John, I think, is the one to read first.I use other translations of scripture when I am studying a book or passage, but in general use I really like The Message translation. A good site: https://www.biblegateway.com/

 While your at it, why not read some wholesome and moral stuff like Deuteronomy 20:10-20? Or the family-friendly Psalm 137:9? What about the nice family values being proclaimed in Genesis 19:30-36? The entire Book of Revelations is great fun too!

Why do skeptics use DESCRIPTIVE passages in the bible & make it PRESCRIPTIVE?Does the Foxes' Book of Martyrs DESCRIBE what happened in history or does it PRESCRIBE the bad behavior of rebellious humans?Do the historical accounts of dictators DESCRIBE what happened or PRESCRIBE the horrors that were done?Also, God has an expressed will & a permissive will ( He allows sentient beings to rebel or have subpar standards & He works with it- polygamy, slavery, war, angry venting like in the imprecatory psalms, blaspheming atheists discussing Him etc.).

reading this is like reading anime/sci fi nerds trying to smooth over plot holes. The stuff is as written nothing more nothing less.

 

Allowing someone to commit a heinous act is immoral too, its why aiding and abetting is a crime.