I come from a family whose beliefs centre around Christianity, so coming out leads to a collective effort from your relatives to "help" you turn back to Christ.

So far I've only been having conversations with my mum about this, but the common ideas she holds are:

1. I must not have understood the Bible properly.
   
2. My Church did not build up my faith properly.
   
3. I couldn't have believed it properly.
   
4. I am just being tested.
   
5. I never fully knew what I was committing to when I got baptised.
   
6. We could have only came from God, so what do I believe in now? Evolution? (note: the answer is obviously yes).
   

It's interesting that Christianity has a whole lot of mechanisms to explain it's way around any doubt one of its believers may have. Instead of considering your doubt to be a stage of growths they ingrain the idea in you that it is just a stage of your Christianity, a test of your faith and an opportunity to show God how much you love Him and believe in Him.

It's a shame because all of these circular arguments do not make for conducive conversations. Anything I say is ignored because I'm "blinded" by my doubts and therefore they should not listen to what I have to say.

I'm not bitter though because when I was a Christian I learned a great deal of patience from evangelising, a process I always thought was a little pointless because people don't change beliefs just like that.

My mum told me that she had told my uncle and he wanted to have a talk with me - as if he would be able to "help" me to remember my "faith". It's funny because they all speak from a position of ignorance and are all in bondage, the very things the gospel claims to free people from but instead subjugates them into babbling all sorts of nonsenses.

I now have to deal with the fact that my mum is being emotionally tormented by the brain washing of Christianity that makes people visualise their loved ones being burned for eternity because they didn't believe. I remember the horror I occasionally suffered when I would think of my mum burning in hell for eternity, so I know how traumatising that must be for her, and is one of the reasons I was reluctant to come out about my de-conversion.

I hate Christianity with a vengeance because it is a vicious and evil device that entraps people into never ending cycles of fear. Christians need to be de-converted big time.