par4dcourse Posted November 27, 2009 Share Posted November 27, 2009 Since we've had a spate of late of concerned xians trying to save our poor souls, I've come up with a sure-fire defense. In accordance with the terms set forth in matthew 12:32, "And whosoever speaketh a word against the Son of man, it shall be forgiven him: but whosoever speaketh against the Holy Ghost, it shall not be forgiven him, neither in this world, neither in the world to come", I hereby issue the following statement: I hereby blaspheme, talk bad about, make "yo mama's so fat" jokes about, disparage, denigrate, bad mouth, defame, slander, and question the heritage of the holy spook. Now, unpardonable sin completed, I just need to point out this post to any and all saviors. Think I'll print a hard copy ;for the jw's at the door. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Googledotman Posted November 27, 2009 Share Posted November 27, 2009 I do it everyday! Blaspheming the holy spirit is actually kind of freeing when you think about it. Just goes to show how much you have grown when you realize there is no hell to be put in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godlessgrrl Posted November 27, 2009 Share Posted November 27, 2009 If I may be so bold as to add: don't buy the line that the only thing that qualifies as TrueBlasphemy against the Holy Spook is saying that Jesus performed his miracles via the power of Satan. (See here or do a Google search to see some typical apologetics on the matter.) Saying so may count as blasphemy, but it isn't the only thing that does. The Greek term used in the verses from Matthew is, not surprisingly, blasphemia. It's from the verb blasphemein, meaning "to speak ill of"; the verb's roots translate more or less as "to injure [someone's] reputation". Getcher copy of the Koine/English interlinear text here for context, in case some whining young n00bie apologeticist on fire for Jesus tries to tell you that the context says something it doesn't actually say. The context does not warrant limiting blasphemy of the Holy Spirit to that specific situation. Jesus' own words are more general than that. Moreover, it doesn't make sense to claim that saying Jesus performed miracles via Satan somehow adds up to blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. All it should add up to is speaking ill of Jesus directly, which Jesus already covered in and around those same verses in Matthew. Going by what the Bible actually says, all you have to do to blaspheme against the Holy Spirit is to speak ill of it. You know, claim it ate all your food, wrecked your car, stole your girlfriend, drank your beer, and generally is an irresponsible jerk who never returns phone calls and likes to knock up virgins. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted November 27, 2009 Author Share Posted November 27, 2009 Good point, GM. I'll add "the holy spook borrowed my weed-eater and never returned it" to my list. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Net Eng Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 Going by what the Bible actually says, all you have to do to blaspheme against the Holy Spirit is to speak ill of it. You know, claim it ate all your food, wrecked your car, stole your girlfriend, drank your beer, and generally is an irresponsible jerk who never returns phone calls and likes to knock up virgins. Warning Link is not safe for work!! Does this count Gwen ??? [LINK] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShackledNoMore Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 If I may be so bold as to add: don't buy the line that the only thing that qualifies as TrueBlasphemy against the Holy Spook is saying that Jesus performed his miracles via the power of Satan. (See here or do a Google search to see some typical apologetics on the matter.) Saying so may count as blasphemy, but it isn't the only thing that does. The Greek term used in the verses from Matthew is, not surprisingly, blasphemia. It's from the verb blasphemein, meaning "to speak ill of"; the verb's roots translate more or less as "to injure [someone's] reputation". Getcher copy of the Koine/English interlinear text here for context, in case some whining young n00bie apologeticist on fire for Jesus tries to tell you that the context says something it doesn't actually say. The context does not warrant limiting blasphemy of the Holy Spirit to that specific situation. Jesus' own words are more general than that. Moreover, it doesn't make sense to claim that saying Jesus performed miracles via Satan somehow adds up to blasphemy of the Holy Spirit. All it should add up to is speaking ill of Jesus directly, which Jesus already covered in and around those same verses in Matthew. Going by what the Bible actually says, all you have to do to blaspheme against the Holy Spirit is to speak ill of it. You know, claim it ate all your food, wrecked your car, stole your girlfriend, drank your beer, and generally is an irresponsible jerk who never returns phone calls and likes to knock up virgins. The thing is, "blaspheming" the holy spirit is vague and not very well defined. The dictionary definition seems to be "to speak of in an irreverent manner." I'm not sure exactly what that means, and I do know that you're not going to find a consistent consensus out there on what constitutes blasphemy either across the christian community or that applies to different purposes. Historically, it has taken very little to evoke accusations of blasphemy in general, yet most proselytizers who have selected you as a mark will tend to make it seem harder to blaspheme the holy spirit than to relocate Mt. Everest using a teaspoon (sorry to be pessimistic about your strategy, Par, I hope I'm wrong). CARM's version seems to be something like that. They say that a believer cannot blaspheme the holy spirit. It sounds difficult for anyone else to blaspheme the holy spirit, by their definition, either: an atheist, who does not believe that the devil exists or that jesus went around performing miracles, would have to make an absurd statement that he knew to be false to blaspheme the holy spirit. One who believes, but a little differently from the CARM folks, or hasn't been "saved" by their definition, would likewise be unlikely to make a claim like that which they believe to be false and possibly believe might condemn them to hell forever. Maybe you would say that if you are a believer in some other form of religious superstition who believes in the christian devil, yet thinks that xianity is heretical, but I don't know of any such religions, and if one exists, it does not have a significant following. One effect of this uncertainty is that it helps foster the fear upon which xianity feeds, and it is another control mechanism. You always have to watch your step for fear that you will blaspheme the holy spirit. Yet, they have to be careful or it will backfire. Four or five hundred years ago, a mere whisper that jesus did not rise for the dead might have gotten one killed. If I told a joke to a room full of xians: Q: Why couldn't Jesus play hockey? A: He keeps getting nailed to the boards. It would be mind boggling to imagine the shock and offense I would generate from my blasphemy. That's OK, though, maybe even a good thing, since I can always be forgiven and then I would have a spectacular testimony. On the other hand, if I made jokes about the Spook of Kraayst, it would certainly have the same shock value, or even more, and there would be the suggestion of blaspheming the holy spirit in play, but it would be processed differently by the prospective soul winner, with lots of mental gymnastics, to avoid having to admit that I am now unsavable, ever, no matter what. Keep someone wondering whether they've blasphemed the holy spirit and you have a broken, fear ridden vessel to manipulate, but if they genuinely become convinced that they've stepped over the line, then oops, you blew it. Hence, the double standard between blasphemy against the holy spirit and blasphemy against the other two-thirds of the godhead or other xian tenants. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Legion Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 Meh, humor is the great inoculator and disarmer. And to this end, I humbly present... A girl falling down... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Taphophilia Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 "You were never really True Christians!" - The most blasphemous blasphemy ever! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
thefriendlyghost Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 I cannot believe I almost had a nervous breakdown because I thought I might have commited this sin. Now, I don't really give a shit. How liberating. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bird28 Posted November 28, 2009 Share Posted November 28, 2009 I think my former churches taught that this sin was once being a Christian and having a personal experience with the Holy Spirit, then later denying it. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted November 28, 2009 Author Share Posted November 28, 2009 I cannot believe I almost had a nervous breakdown because I thought I might have commited this sin. Now, I don't really give a shit. How liberating. Me too. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Skepticaldude541 Posted November 29, 2009 Share Posted November 29, 2009 The Holy Ghost tried to rape my cat, steal my furniture, and imprison me forever in a tomb made of lightning magick. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
R. S. Martin Posted November 29, 2009 Share Posted November 29, 2009 Shaklednomore, I'm looking at your new avatar. You don't mean to say...you've actually and truly discovered the orbiting TEA POT--have you? I'll have to tell all the Christians. If I can get anyone to take me seriously it will really throw them for a loop. Not that there's a chance that I can but wow! just seeing this fabled teapot makes my day. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Midnight-mindwanderings Posted November 29, 2009 Share Posted November 29, 2009 I think my former churches taught that this sin was once being a Christian and having a personal experience with the Holy Spirit, then later denying it. That was essentially what my old church taught. More specifically they used it to disprove the once-saved-always-saved notion. They didn't think it was just simply saying "AThe Holy Spirit is a cum-guzzling thundercunt". Which it is. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godlessgrrl Posted November 29, 2009 Share Posted November 29, 2009 Does this count Gwen ??? Man. That's some serious blASSphemy there. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vomit Comet Posted December 3, 2009 Share Posted December 3, 2009 I'm too chickenshit to make that final step. Sometimes I wonder if I'll puss out on my death bed and beg Jebus to take me back. (I suspect that many people do.) I guess I'm kind of hedging my bets. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted December 3, 2009 Author Share Posted December 3, 2009 I'm too chickenshit to make that final step. Sometimes I wonder if I'll puss out on my death bed and beg Jebus to take me back. (I suspect that many people do.) I guess I'm kind of hedging my bets. Pascal's wager rears it's ugly head. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vomit Comet Posted December 3, 2009 Share Posted December 3, 2009 Pascal's wager rears it's ugly head. "Make him an offer he can't refuse." What a fuckin' racket. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted December 3, 2009 Author Share Posted December 3, 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BRYAN Posted December 3, 2009 Share Posted December 3, 2009 I do it everyday! Blaspheming the holy spirit is actually kind of freeing when you think about it. Just goes to show how much you have grown when you realize there is no hell to be put in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest BRYAN Posted December 3, 2009 Share Posted December 3, 2009 -And what if you're wrong? Then what? Seriously, pascal's wager is on the table but nothing is stated.... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
godlessgrrl Posted December 3, 2009 Share Posted December 3, 2009 I am an atheist. I don't believe in a god or gods. If I'm wrong, then depending on which religion is right, any of a number of things could happen. If Xianity is right, then I will not spend eternity in heaven with Jealous. Depending on one's favorite scriptures, that either means oblivion, or an eternity in hell. Seems pretty straightforward to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
par4dcourse Posted December 3, 2009 Author Share Posted December 3, 2009 Well put, Gwen. -And what if you're wrong? Then what? Seriously, pascal's wager is on the table but nothing is stated.... I committed the unpardonable sin (see OP). Now shoo, pesky fly. There must be easier sheep for you to fleece. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ShackledNoMore Posted December 4, 2009 Share Posted December 4, 2009 Well put, Gwen. -And what if you're wrong? Then what? Seriously, pascal's wager is on the table but nothing is stated.... I committed the unpardonable sin (see OP). Now shoo, pesky fly. There must be easier sheep for you to fleece. Told ya! Bryan, I don't know whether you've thought about this before, but what if the Allah version of the Judaic god is the "True God" and Mohammad is his prophet? What if some other god or gods is the "True God" and it is you that has pissed it or them off (rather than Googledotman, Par, Gwen, or me) with your unquestioning faith in the bible god? Heck, what if there is a god of my teapot who is just waiting out there to zap you if you DON'T blaspheme the holy spirit? That's actually less falsifiable than the threats of the bible god because there is not well developed mythology accompanying it that brings in a bunch of contradictory and refuted claims. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vomit Comet Posted December 4, 2009 Share Posted December 4, 2009 Told ya! Looks like the clinical trial for his vaccine didn't go so well! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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