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Goodbye Jesus

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Showing content with the highest reputation on 05/03/2019 in all areas

  1. I tried to post on Crazyguy's therad and got this: [[Template forums/front/topics/topic is throwing an error. This theme may be out of date. Run the support tool in the AdminCP to restore the default theme.]]
    1 point
  2. I was typing this out quickly on a tablet without reviewing. I don't believe in Christianity anymore.
    1 point
  3. It sucks getting errors like that when trying to post something, but thank you for trying! It means a lot!
    1 point
  4. Here in Canada, we have a half- wit for a prime minister. Thankfully, later this year, we will have a chance to kick his wimpy ass to the curb
    1 point
  5. I started studying the cults back as a believer in the 80s to try and learn the differences between Christianity and "them". When I described how they often get converts through love-bombing, a friend asked me how that was different from what we were doing. That made me pause. But mostly I just assumed that we had it right and the big difference was what we believed, not the entire mindset of making belief critical instead of demonstrable facts. Whenever I spoke with JWs or Mormons at the door, it was always about doctrines or exposing the corruption of their leadership rather than going after faith in myths being critical to a god's judgment of my life. I was a strong believer for 30 years, the last 9 of which were spent promoting a particular preacher from the south who claims thousands of outstanding miracles, the most notable being several people raised from the dead. While I promoted him and defended him online against critics, I brought up comparisons to the faith we put in the Bible where we didn't see those miracles either but have no doubt they happened. I pointed out that everything he preached was biblical, that he was going to "the least of these", and showed a life of utter commitment to Jesus. Then one day I caught him making up a long involved tale about a witch coven challenging the power of god at one of his services in Germany. I had just watched those services on video, and no such thing happened. His translator had trouble understanding his southern accent, that was all. But he turned it into a huge tale about witches falling under the power of god and all getting born-again. That was the slap in the face I needed. It began a year of questioning why he would need to make up anything. Keep in mind, I had felt power in his services, the body shaking and trembling like electricity was coursing through my body. That was unique from all the other church involvement I'd had. But this fact staring me in the face couldn't be denied. During this year of questioning why, the evening news was reporting about the Oklahoma polygamous cult and I wondered out loud "Why would anybody believe such crazy stuff?" Then I realized with chagrin that I had believed some outstandingly stupid things. Then I asked the most important question, "I wonder what else I've believed that is a lie?" I had a visceral reaction to that question, actually squirming, because I knew it struck at the root of my own faith. But I persisted in the question, and lots of other buried questions began resurfacing. Why is the god of the bible such an arrogant asshole? Why are all the obvious myths of the bible "true"? Why is the church divided instead of filled with almighty power and doing miracles? Why are most prayers for healing completely ignored? Why is hell not mentioned in the old testament? On and one the questions came. I revisited why I had first believed. It was out of a childish fear of monsters. When I'd see a monster movie (not the campy Godzilla ones) that monster was real and waiting for me in the dark hallway. When I saw an advert for The Exorcist, I felt a cold fear to the core of my being and read the Bible looking for protection. That was it. A stupid childish fear led to 30 years of committed belief, thousands of hours or praying to no one, tens of thousand of dollars given away to promote the cult, my own sexual life messed up with rules and fears of demons and judgments. I went searching online for "ex-christian" and found this site. I realized in short order that these folks had the same kinds of experiences, and I then posted my own realization that I was no longer a Christian. I was part of a cult called Christianity, and the last decade was part of a more classic cult with a charismatic leader that couldn't be questioned by his closest "fellow missionaries". It took an emotional shock to get me to even start questioning the faith. I also realized that reality hadn't changed at all by my deconversion, but that I had taken off a blindfold or filter through which I had interpreted reality. The same question "I wonder what else I've believed that is a lie?" still applies daily because I spent so long assuming I had things right. It applies to culture, politics, and science because where people are involved, there can be falsification of evidence, people seeing personal wealth at my expense, and so on.
    1 point
  6. That's what happened to me...I bumped into this sight , IDK, 10-12 years ago, something like that. From time to time when searching for topics this sight would be in the search results and I would pop in again and read some stuff...at first it made me angry or uncomfortable or ..other not positive emotions. Some of it hurt my feelings. But then I started saying, Oh yeah, you know I question, think, feel that too. Or wow that makes me nervous or scares me. But I kept reading anyway! And , well here I am deconverting.
    1 point
  7. I have suffered lots in my life and never got help from God. I truly did things out of love and compassion and didn’t ask for much..just help from God. Nothing was ever answered. I have not suffered as deeply and traumatic as you have but I understand your suffering from an empathetic view point...been there done that! I’m so sorry you had to go through that... it’s cruel where was the so called “loving” God!
    1 point
  8. People like you need to join the real human race... starting at conception, 24/7/365 rage, hate, anger, malice, manipulation, beatings for anything, everything and nothing, until the welts on my body would bleed and stick to the chair at school. A Texas Baptist preacher father and mother who think you have to beat out of children what you don't want in them; including an imagined look on their face that you don't care for. (teaching me a lesson? Being moved towards holiness?). And tells my sister to stop the temper tantrums and fits her severely autistic child has; there is nothing wrong with him he just isn't disciplined enough! This behavior can be whipped out of him. She needs to whip him more. And lets move on to adulthood...relentless physical challenges one after another endlessly and relentlessly(I still have every one of them) while doing EVERYTHING possible, mentally, physically, spiritually, emotionally, financially, medically, holistically, lifestyle etc. etc. To stop, prevent, reverse mitigate.....and the shit just keeps coming at me..(teaching me a lesson?).. WHILE serving GOD 100%, all-in, living for him, renewing my mind, building and keeping strong faith, loving and turning the other cheek , 100% forgiving my crazy and violent misguide parents and sincerely loving them anyway, helping them, helping others, giving money, food, clothes, furniture etc. to the poor.... AND not one tiny bit of healing or preventing help from the three stooges not even one time for one problem. (teaching me a lesson?). That my friend is the real world for real people...not the Christians who tell me crap like; God is perfecting me; teaching me a lesson; disciplining me for my sins; and must have a really GREAT and SPECIAL PURPOSE later on for me to LET me suffer so much; and I obviously don't have real faith or enough faith or the right kind of faith; or I must have deep sinful or wrong attitudes, wrong thinking; or seek only the healer not the healing (I did that for a decade or two); or I didn't plant enough seed; And my all-time favorite, I just don't know how to receive, he WANTS to heal me but I WONT LET HIM... all the Christian crap in some ways was worse then the madness and insanity my crazy maker (a psychologist told me that is what they call moms like mine) mom and harsh, critical, judgmental, violent, coldhearted, zero compassion for human suffering (he thinks sickness is in our heads we make it up we are faking it, buck up ignore it and keep going), dad said and did to me. I told God repeatedly, hey fine, OK, the upbringing from hell. Many people have to endure and go through things. BUT the relentless Physical problem hell for the rest of my life too? Good Greif, God give people one or the other if you think you need to ..But NOT BOTH. It is just too much to deal with both! Your evil God (who is really the devil, they are the same entity, the Warrior god of destruction named Yahweh) didn't give a dam and didn't hear one word of this. And there is more...this is the readers digest highlights only version of my life. And for the record, I did not cause my own problems in life like a lot of people do with their habits, choices, lifestyles, vices, abuses, neglects etc. I took actions and made choices and lived life in such a way to PREVENT, mitigate, reverse problems. I was very diligent and very careful and took excellent care of myself in every way. Still do. But in addition to a lifetime of health challenges, now I get to deal with ALL of the same health issues that getting old brings to people who took less care of themselves, who ignored/neglected or abused their health/bodies. Isn't life grand! End3, join the real world...if I see one more Christian who had such an easy life that they are beautiful, healthy, perfect and never have had a pimple or a cavity and they fall apart when they have a cold sore on their lip and say to me all upset and emotional "how do you stand it" (meaning my numerous relentless physical challenges) I might just have no choice but to resort to murder
    1 point
  9. now when I think about God/Jesus/Holy Spirit I just cant help myself I refer to them as the THREE STOOGES! You youngsters probably wont know what I am talking about but us older Folks know who the 3 Stooges are! I am starting to believe that the bible God is really the devil (and/or other evil principalities and powers) which is why we are under constant abuse and attack. We have been duped into worshipping and following Evil which is why there is no loving response to prayer! Evil cant respond in kindness and love and wont do good things to help us. There is no Hell after this life. This is hell we are already in it! Fuego Thanks for your words of compassion.
    1 point
  10. I need physical healing and now it has progressed to the point of needing creation type Miracles too and cant understand why God would never heal me, not even one problem, not even one time or prevent even one physical problem from happening? Makes no sense. Below is the condensed Journey, I sent to someone who asked what happened, of why I have given up on Life and God. He just does not want to do anything for. Me. I Dont know why and am totally exhausted, frustrated, hurt and angry from asking or trying! I am done suffering. I have only stayed on this earth the past 3 years because I just cant seem to decide how to die with the least amount of hurt and trauma to my husband. The Journey: I overcame a severe mental, physical, spiritual, emotionally abusive and neglectful childhood (both parents and one pedophile) that sent me out into the world seriously messed up to the point of not being able to speak a complete sentence, constant state of fear and deep non-stop sadness. And severe Dissociation with NO coping, people, social, hygiene, emotional, intellectual, common sense or any other skills, zero self esteem/confidence, numerous physical problems (some born with some caused by the child abuse/neglect.) Extremely poor physical health in every way. At 19 I was told I had the body health of a 60 year old. I overcame almost all by my late twenties/early thirites. I lived a drug, tobacco, alcohol, porno, violence, jail, crime, mental institute, suicide free and productive, intelligent, successful, contributing member of society life in spite of the overwhelming and relentless challenges. EXCEPT physically. 52 years of 1000's of hours of prayer and bible studies/reading, keeping the Word in my eyes and ears. Applying the Word to my daily life. Increasing my faith until I refused to doubt but believed no matter what. Repenting, renewing mind, being prayed for by numerous others, praying for healing of others, joining the healing rooms, improving my mind, emotions, attitudes etc. in every way. Praise, worship, breaking curses, commanding evil spirits and sickness/disease and everything to leave in Jesus name, helping others. Sincerely and truly, with Love and true compassion, not because I was supposed to, Forgiving and helping my parents, especially at end of life when they needed it most, I did ALL I could starting at age 18: AMA Medica/Dental care, World Class Naturopath (One of best in the USA) care, Chiro, Massage Therapy, not perfect but excellent diet, exercise, Chinese Herbalist, lots of self help care and Psychologist guided help and much more! ( we must do EVERTHING possible to improve our physical, mental and emotional health and take very good care of ourselves not just expect anyone including God to do it all for us). But the more I improved all mentioned above, and the more I followed God/Jesus/Holy Spirit and the better care I took of myself and ...... More health problems would come on relentlessly and existing ones got worse and worse. I just kept accumulating them; resisting, kicking and screaming and fighting against them all the way!.
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