Jump to content

Leaderboard

Popular Content

Showing content with the highest reputation since 03/07/2020 in Posts

  1. I am finally ready to share my story. I read many testimonies on here in the beginning of my deconversion that really helped me feel less alone. Maybe my story will help someone too. I grew up in a relaxed Christian home. My mom was very involved in the church, but we didn't live out our faith at home. My childhood was normal and I didn't become a devout Christian until I was in college. We attended church reguarly, but our Pastor didn't really preach from the Bible. He would throw a verse into his sermons now and then, but every service was more of a feel good, God loves you sort
    13 points
  2. Hello, Ex-C community. I've roamed these forums on and off for over a decade, since shortly after deconverting about 15 years ago. Mine was a traumatic exit from the church, then it took me a few years to realize that the break was permanent. I'm an older woman (as implied by my name, I guess). I came to faith for the last time in my mid-30's, after a couple of decades of trying to find my way to something in which I could honestly believe, trying very hard to make a spiritual home somewhere. I blindly accepted the lie that children require spiritual training to become moral adults
    13 points
  3. Hi all. I don't think I've told my story in full here, so now is as good a time as any. It's fairly long, but thank you for reading in advance and I hope it helps somebody. My Story - From a pastors kid to an atheist. Religious History I was a Christian from birth for 32 1/2 years of my life. When I was born my parents were in a non denominational church which followed the teachings of a Pentecostal (Ex Baptist) divine healing preacher. Several years after I was born my parents left the church over doctrinal disagreements and started house meetings. This continued for some yea
    11 points
  4. Seriously? Every person who comes into these forums is brave as fuck. Many have lost family, friends, careers. Some have given up positions of power and influence. Some people here have overcome extreme toxicity and learned compassion. A lot of them still hurt and grieve. There's nothing special about you just because you hate your imaginary friend; and trying to turn this into a "my dick's bigger" contest is banal and childish.
    11 points
  5. Leia, if I'm being honest, I'm concerned about how much the hateful environment in which you were submerged might have affected you. I'd caution against allowing their hatred of others become your hatred of them. Anger has its place in life, and certainly in the deconversion process; but either we master and use it for good, or it masters and uses us, for results that may be less than good.
    11 points
  6. Hello, dearest Ex-C friends! I logged in the other day and responded to a few posts, I was so happy to see some familiar names and received a few messages of greeting from some old friends. For those of you I have not met or interacted with, this post will hopefully bring you some hope, peace, and encouragement. Here is my original post, so long ago. I have had years now to really sift through my upbringing and some of the lasting scars I will carry with me because of the brand of Christianity that was imposed on me. Everyone here was right, it gets so much better! If you are where I was so l
    10 points
  7. If you are familiar with my introduction and as mentioned in some of my posts you will know that I was a no doubter who was led away from the faith, nor did I experience any adverse life events or mistreatment at the hands of, or in the name of, christianity. Instead, I was a rock solid believer who had reached some uncomfortable, but necessary conclusions earlier in life, but in no way did these unusual - for a Southern Baptist - beliefs impair my belief in god or Jesus Christ. My descent into deconversion began in my quest to help my wife believe. She had questions - lots of que
    10 points
  8. Is anyone else amazed at how clear their mind is since deconverting? When I was a Christian, I was always praying in my head, apologizing to God for thoughts that weren't Christ-like, remembering scriptures...It was exhausting! Ever since I quit believing in God, I feel so much better! Anyone else experience this?
    10 points
  9. Hi Krys! I know that fear is an irrational thing, but sometimes a look at the long view can put things into their proper perspective. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Extinction_event As far as we know there have been five major extinction events in Earth's 4.5 billion year history. Even the least of them dwarfs what's happening today. And after each one, when it seemed that life couldn't possibly recover... after a few million years it did. Even after... T H E G R E A T D Y I N G ...when 96% of all sea life and 70%
    9 points
  10. While you may not lack for courage Leia, you don't seem to have gained any freedom from the god you hate so much. A slave who hates their master, but who can do nothing to set themselves free from him can have all the courage in the world. But their courage will not set them free. They will remain a slave, albeit a rebellious one. So long as they remain obsessed with vengeance, retribution and reprisals, this god has total power over them. I cannot speak for anyone else here, but as an atheist I have totally freed myself from
    9 points
  11. I asked that question on a Christian site where I’m active. To my surprise a hard core fundamentalist acknowledged that God doesn’t seem to be in the prayer answering business. He then referenced all the historical suffering Christians have had to endure. He ended his thoughts by stating that it’s foolish to expect God to respond to prayer. I was frankly shocked by his honesty. This guy is a Bible quoting fundy, that apparently has been struck by reality. I don’t know that he’s ready to leave the faith just yet, but it seems that reality has slapped him in his face.
    9 points
  12. Funny how god could create Adam from dust and Eve from a rib; but he had to impregnate another man's fiance to become human himself.
    9 points
  13. As moderators, we have this entire website under our purview. This includes newly deconverted members who are still struggling, christians who are facing crises of faith, and lurkers who might be anywhere on the spectrum. When one member actively seeks to undermine our primary purpose, we have to weigh the needs of everyone against the possibility of offending the one who was deliberately running riot in several forums. If sparing further trauma to already traumatized members means seeming to disrespect the one, I'm comfortable with that. Because my purpose here is reaching out to other re
    9 points
  14. I left my last non-denominational Christian church more than 15 years ago, after trying to be the “perfect Christian” for almost 20 years, but my journey of being in a love/hate relationship with God started in 2001. I had been married 362 days before and had just left my emotionally and physically abusive husband. I hadn't yet been hit but had been hurt in other ways and knew, the night before, that if I didn't leave, I would be hit soon. I had married this man, after a whirlwind dating experience, 8 months after we had met. I was 29, a month shy of 30, when we married, and I was sure that Go
    9 points
  15. Many of us, myself included, went through a part of our deconversion where we thought of ourselves as Deists. Meaning having a belief in some supreme but impersonal intelligence, as opposed to a deity who takes an interest in the lives of humans. After giving up belief in the God of the Bible, it can feel like too big a step to not believe that there is anybody "in charge" of the universe. Maybe there is, maybe there isn't. Or maybe the closest thing to somebody being in charge is the existence of the laws of physics. In any case, the Deist and the non-Deist both have to live their lives
    9 points
  16. I’ve been wanting to post my story for over a year now. I start and then never finish. I don’t want to bore everyone with all of my details, but it’s hard to boil everything down - well, here goes My deconversion started about 3 years ago, I think. My belief system was ultra conservative Catholic. So much so that other Catholics didn’t necessarily know where I was coming from. I had what I believed to be a “born again moment” back in 2000. Prior to that, I was a run of the mill Catholic, checking my boxes of following the faith and trying to be a “good person”. The interesting twi
    9 points
  17. If there are any spelling errors or pronunciation errors in this article then I ask for forgiveness in Jesus's name. Amen!!! Here are my reasons for deconversion. It's more to do with the reasons why, rather than telling my story, after all that's what matters. Some of my points are from great minds other than myself, and I do not appologise for this as these people have inspired myself and many others to lose faith. I started losing my belief with the 1st scenario below. To me this is ENOUGH proof that Bible god is NOT real Scenario I'm very interested in coming
    8 points
  18. I was raised by strict christian parents and of course the result was adverse childhood events codependency people pleasing lack of boundaries. I am a retired RN. I have given many churches their chance but always run into cognitive dissonance hypocritical behavior control issues. I have faith but will never enter another church again. I am in charge of my own life. How sad to be treated so poorly by self professed Christian's multiple times and be aware of the tactics . I am a new member. This is my first post.
    8 points
  19. I'm glad you're here, @WWOAC. Yes, you were a Christian. If you called yourself a Christian that's what you were. If you are not anymore then that's great! Don't get caught up in the constant goal-post shifting and weaponized delegitimization of people's experiences. They beckon you to do that because it helps them ignore counter-evidence when they delegitimize the experiences and perspectives of anyone who disagrees with them, outright. Christians like to claim ownership of everything, but in reality they robbed most things from other cultures - like components of their own mythic
    8 points
  20. They were doing the same thing when I was your age; and the only thing that happened was a meteor killed my pet dinosaur.
    8 points
  21. I sent an email to Jon inviting him to this website.
    8 points
  22. To help break the boredom and cabin fever, I took a camping trip to a remote rural area and took our dog with me. Couldn't get my wife to go. We took all the food we needed, and enjoyed long hikes in a "badlands" area that had been opened up recently. Saw all kinds of wildlife, and the largest herd of buffalo I have ever seen. And one was a rare white buffalo. The only chance of exposure, or exposing anyone else, was refueling at a gas station, and I minimized that with Clorox wipes. Western Kansas isn't the most spectacular place in the world, but does have some interesting features if
    8 points
  23. I was born in September of 1976, in the USSR, Kiev City that now is the capital of Ukraine. I’m the oldest of my 3 siblings. 1970s were the years of Christian persecution. I don’t remember the 70s much, but I do remember mid 1980s, with Gorbachev coming into power as the time of more freedoms for the Christians, especially the late 1980s that saw public preaching in the streets. As fate would have it, my parents were very active in the Evangelical Baptist church. My dad was very close with the Senior Pastor and my mom sang in the choir. Those of you from the US may not appreciate the
    7 points
  24. I came across a bullet point list of arguments for and against Christianity, so stealing that and adding my thoughts I came up with the speed list below. Of course complex arguments done in short hand will often miss points which people consider critical, but as a quick main point view I think it works. Are there others in either list that you consider strong or common enough to be worth including? Arguments For: Kalam Cosmological – “Everything has a creator”, weak because that is an unfounded assertion, we have only one example of a universe and nothing to compare to.
    7 points
  25. Hey, so I’ve been wanting to post here for awhile, and I’m still kind of confused on how to post in what sections as a new member, but here I am! I’m kind of nervous, but I guess I’ll just go ahead. I’m in my early twenties and last year I officially left Christianity. I grew up conservative and homeschooled in the southern United States, and I graduated college almost two years ago. Three years ago I almost killed my self for a lot of reasons, but one of them was hating myself for being bisexual. I’ve known since I was about 11 that I was bisexual, at least in the loosest underst
    7 points
  26. Hey everyone, Well I like to check in from time to time. I really should be more active but I do good to keep up with my ever changing life the past couple of years. This ones gonna be a bit of a bummer. As you all know Lady Bishop and I have had a rocky road of things, especially after I deconverted. The past two years we have dealt with major illness, deaths in the family, and of course covid 19 like everyone else. We are officially filing for divorce. Its not all because of our religious differences but its probably one of the biggest issues in recent years. It set us apart on a
    7 points
  27. John Steinguard announces his renouncement. Sights problem in Bible that rampant misogyny indicates books where written by, and in the interest of, ancient men of the time(s). Smart boy! I wonder how many of his fans will take note... https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/hawk-nelson-religion-christian-rock-songs-god-a9533286.html
    7 points
  28. I just can't anymore. When I was going to church, there were many there (possibly everyone there) who greatly admire Donald Trump. I was regularly admonished that it is "your duty as a Christian" to support Donald Trump. If they are so blind that they can't see that Donald Trump is a bad man, I can't be part of their group. If the blind lead the blind, then both will fall into a pit. I just can't. I just can't be part of that anymore. I prayed for years that the church would see the truth, but it is just like praying to a stone. A really really deaf stone. Praying to a stone would be bett
    7 points
  29. That's kind of a weird argument to make. Those same Judeo-Christian values, while static in the book, have been wholesale reinterpreted to meet the whims of the society. You should ask them to clarify which values exactly? Western Society has included these very specific religious gems: The Inquisition Indulgences (sold for hundreds of years) The Crusades Salem Witch Trials European Wars of religion (30 years war among others) And the Professor's inclusion: Divine Right Manifest Destiny Your questioner needs t
    7 points
  30. Longer than intended, but covers the subject well. This has been a hard thing and I can't really tell anyone because in my part of the country, it will professionally destroy you to not be Christian. I mean sure, the foreigners can worship their false gods, but as a native Southerner, you better be Christian - type doesn't matter so much, just as long as not mormon or jehovah's witness (those are cults after all). Catholics are a bit dicey, but they're probably going to heaven so long as they actually believe in Jesus, though the whole "Mary worship" is nonsense. Grew
    7 points
  31. When I was 6 years old, I asked my mother what hell would be like. With the sincere intensity that only a fundamentalist, evangelical, pentecostal sadist can inflict, she told me to imagine the absolute worst pain I could ever endure and that would only be a bee sting compared to hell. Eyes inflamed, she told this to a (vividly imaginative) 6 year old boy. She enjoyed inflicting pain on others; and still does. For her, it is a means of expressing the misery she suffers herself. It is a means of controlling others because she feels out of control herself. She inflicts guilt on others to k
    7 points
  32. ( flings the door open) Mooom! daaad! I’m hoooome! ( studio audience applause) OMG it’s been 6 years since I last visited the ExC Forums! i see some old faces: Margee, Florduh, Redneck Professor! You guys were part of the ExC generation that raised me. Seriously, I started here in like 2007 as a terrified young adult who had just left Bible college and could barely find my vagina with both hands! You guys were with me through awkward virginity losing and coming out to the family and my 4-year “ let’s date a Christian” phase. I took a long break b
    7 points
  33. Welcome! Keeping a false peace by lying about who you are serves no one. You are as entitled to your own opinions as anyone else. Many Christians can't handle the fact that lots of people finally see the sham of religion. How they react to that reality is not your fault. It's usually the same story; "It would break my heart if you don't believe what I believe" "I'm so afraid for your soul" "What did we do wrong to make you do this?" How can you do this to us?" .... and blah, blah, blah. Do not allow their emotional blackmail dictate how you live your life honestly. There may be som
    7 points
  34. I think what you’re referring to is called rationalizing a cognitive dissonance. All religious people have to do this in order for the Bible to make sense in their minds. Why do intelligent people believe things that are not believable or scientifically possible? Google the term “cognitive bias” and you will find the answer.
    7 points
  35. Hi @2022grad and welcome to Ex-Christian! Well, 2020 has not been the most fun year so far but it’s nothing remarkable when you look back even a little bit. Times like 1968, World War 2, World War 1, the American Civil War, the Black Death etc etc all must have seemed like the End Times. Christians have been predicting an imminent end of the world for as long as there have been Christians. Jesus himself seemed to think he would return very soon after his death to set up God’s kingdom. It didn’t happen so later writings gradually changed the story to put it off in the never-neve
    7 points
  36. One of my colleagues from work saw me and Ms. Professor at the grocery store this past weekend. He did not say "Hello", or try to speak to me at all. His reasoning was, "I figured since you never want to talk to people at work, you probably wouldn't want to outside of work either." Reckon I'm more adept at this social distancing thing than I realized.
    7 points
  37. Christianity has rules. When you leave the faith, no more rules. No label is required. No belief in this or that is required. There is no requirement that you 'stick to' a certain particular way of thinking either. 1. Being unsure about the existence of gods is fine. 2. Concluding that there is not enough evidence to believe in a god is fine. 3. Concluding there are no gods is fine. 4. Believing in 'something else' is fine as long as you are it's master. Dont kow tow to any belief system nor label.
    7 points
  38. Hi. I'm looking for other people who are interested in skepticism, atheism, apologetics and Christianity. I grew up in the Lutheran church. In my early 20s I earned a degree in biblical studies, but that experience led to my deconversion. It's a strange analogy, but I think of it like someone who loved hot dogs finding out exactly how they are made. Now I don't ever want to eat another hot dog. Goofy, I know. But I'm still fascinated by the big questions, and how and why people believe. Thanks for reading.
    7 points
  39. Belief is a substitute for knowing. It is fine when based on some actual evidence (like a hypothesis), but religion always wants it to be in a vacuum. "Here's a book, it is a substitute for all the cool magical things he promised in the book. Isn't that wonderful?! Remember, he LUVS you..." People (like myself) get suckered into the bargain of belief through fears, crises, or often through manipulative friends (sponsors in 12-step addiction programs) that promise all kinds of magical cures and LUUUUVVVV. Since there is a default respect given through the culture to the many ch
    7 points
  40. Hello All, Firstly, I hope that you all are well during this challenging time. I found this site today actually, because I was just looking for support. I would like to share my story and hope to connect to any other individuals who have similar stories and maybe we can just support one another on our journeys. My family was very religious and the practice of Christianity goes back generations. I am of African American decent and so religion and church in general played a huge part in my ancestors lives, post slavery. It gave the black community a safe space to sociali
    7 points
  41. The well dressed man entered the chemist shop. He paused to scan the shelves packed with boxes and bottles. With a sigh, he made his way to the counter. "Good morning sir. How can I help you today?" said the pharmacist, dressed in his customary white lab coat, the white on black name tag proudly announcing his name as John. "Yes, good morning. I've left the doctors office where I was told I have the flu. When I asked the doctor what I should take he said 'there is nothing for it, anything I give you would be no better than a placebo', so hence I'm here to buy a placebo." "Err
    7 points
  42. No one, including you has had a god moment, because there is no such thing as god. Most of us here had what we thought were god moments, but later realised it was just wishful thinking/hallucination/crowd hype/co incidence etc. So it's nothing to be sad about, we have not walked away from god, as there is no god. We walked away from the beliefs that were taught to us from a young age. We simply realised god doesn't exist. Prayers aren't answered and there is no one out there intervening in any way. That's why there is so much bad stuff in the world.. But there is also good stuff. We as humans
    7 points
  43. Don't be afraid to do a lot of crying honey because it helps dissipate the hate and anger. I was very angry for a long time. It's called grief. Don't be afraid of it. You are probably a gentle person who is angry at yourself because we got duped and brainwashed by the lie of the christian doctrine. Today, a very good acquaintance of mine (who runs the corner store and I know him fairly well) told me that this virus was here because Jesus is sending a clear message for people to go back to church. If I didn't like him so much, I could have punched his face in. I guess I still need c
    7 points
  44. I lived about 20-years of my life as the "perfect christian". I followed ALL of the rules, I taught Bible Study, I was a counselor for teens at a christian camp for many years, I oversaw the junior high youth group, I was on the worship team, I helped lead retreats, I baptized some of those junior high students, I went on mission trips, I did, I did, I did, in order to please god, follow his plan, be an example, earn his favor. I just realized yesterday that I was probably attracted to Christianity, at 16-years-old, because I was a rule follower - I strived for perfection - in everything I did
    6 points
  45. Hello Leia. I hope you won’t mind my relating a true story to you. The story is true because its my story. Many years ago, I was betrayed by someone who was a very good friend and close confidant. His act of betrayal hurt me terribly and had very bad consequences for me on personal, familial and financial levels. I’ve never spoken to him again and I avoid all contact with him, even though we still live in the same area. Fast forward five years and I was working in a department of local government and I had access to confidential records and information
    6 points
  46. I suppose the point that I (and others) have tried to make is that having already lost so much of your life to this cult, why are you so determined to keep devoting your life to them? It's like you haven't really taken off the shackles; you've just turned them around in the opposite direction and called yourself free. But, you're not free. You're still enslaved. Your anger at them has you just as imprisoned in your behavior, thought, and emotion, as they had you. I sincerely wish you the best; but I will say no more.
    6 points
  47. I briefly considered a deist God. Then I realized it was simply God of the gaps so went straight into atheism. Also a deist God is an unfalsifiable proposition. A god set everything off with a big bang then let it roll, and doesn't want to be found? Might as well not exist as far as we mortals are concerned.
    6 points
  48. Thank you for your support; it means a lot to me. What if the Koran is true after all? What if the Bhagavad Gita is true after all? What Odin or Zeus was true after all? Step back and look at planet earth. What in the world would make a person believe in that hideous bible? At some point the blinders will fall off and you will see things differently.
    6 points
  49. 6 points


×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Guidelines.