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heather

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  • Content Count

    7
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About heather

  • Rank
    Curious

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    US
  • Interests
    reading, home education, library science
  • More About Me
    I feel like just registering here is a huge step for me.

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    the impersonal laws of the universe
  1. Thanks for the welcome Serendipity! :)

  2. There's some great people here, Heather. You ARE lucky to have your husband along for the ride. I homeschooled my kids, too. The youngest graduated this year though. Are you familiar with secularhomeshool.com? If not, you should check it out and see if there is a secular group near you.

  3. Hello! I'm new here too, and it sounds like we have similar circumstances. Great to "meet" you!

  4. Thank you so much to everyone for the welcome! It has been really helpful to read a few posts every day and realize that I'm not alone in this. So far we've just told people that we need a break from church, and it's been awkward, but nothing horrible yet. It is funny that everyone assumes that we're having some kind of marital or family problem and ask if they can help us. "Um...no thanks, you see it's not us, it's you..." My husband did get one email from a man from our old charismatic church who had heard we were "drifting away" and apologized for not being a better friend. I thought it was a little silly, but I also felt sorry for him. I don't want any old christian friends feeling guilty for failing us. It was the entire religion, not them personally. Anyone dealt with this before?
  5. Thanks for sharing! I hope you're not afraid of us - we don't bite :)

  6. Ok, this is hard, but I feel like I need to do it. I'll try to keep it brief, since most of my circumstances will probably be similar to many here. I was raised in the methodist church by parents who didn't talk about god much, and that was fine with me. High school was rough, and then my boyfriend invited me to a charismatic church. I was totally sucked in, and I didn't even mind changing who I was because I didn't like myself that much to begin with. We got married young and he went to a bible college to prepare for work in ministry. Along the way we had 2 beautiful children. We worked in a charismatic church for about 10 years, and I was more and more miserable every year. But then something happened that started to change everything. Things started falling apart at church. We couldn't turn a blind eye to the hypocrisy and lies any more. To our horror (at the time), they let us go. Stupidly, we hung around a little while longer, but I was leaving behind all their teachings or at least stripping it back to my original laid back methodist upbringing. I decided I couldn't let anyone tell me what to believe ever again, so I began reading and studying everything I could about god and the church. I think I was hoping I'd find someplace to fit in, some group I could agree with and belong to. We drifted for a while and finally started attending a trendy local church where our kids had friends, because we thought that would be good for them. Meanwhile my reading started showing me the cracks in my theology. I think the biggest turning point for me was when I read several books by Bart Ehrman. When I finally accepted that the bible just wasn't true at all, and that lots of people had known about it for a long time, I was angry for a while. I'm just grateful that my husband agreed to look into it too, and now we agree about it. It's made a huge difference to me to be able to talk to him about it. So now we're just trying to figure out what to do. Our families are christian, all our friends are christian, all our kids' friends are christian. We haven't even been able to explain our loss of faith to our children yet. We've just told them that we need a break from church, but that was a huge step for me. I'm so glad I found this website, and I hope I find the courage to make the next steps I need to make.
  7. Hi ilovemybrain, thanks for the welcome! I've been working up the courage to say more, and I think today will be the day. :)

  8. Welcome, Heather! I also love reading (vast understatement) and I'm studying library science. Hope to hear more about you when you're ready.

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