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NeverAgainV

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About NeverAgainV

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    only human

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  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Midwest
  • Interests
    Art, Movies & Music. NPR & Chicago Progressive Talk-WCPT. 1970's & 80's. Comic books & graphic novels. Learning how cults manipulate & thought reform.
  • More About Me
    Ex-bible cult devotee. Raised Catholic, got involved in abusive calvinist/baptist sect. I'm a struggling artist. & trying to make up for lost time in the cult...it seems daunting, but at least I'm FREE of that abusive bible cult. Woooo Hoooo! :D
    I did not crawl under a rock & die. Funny, how the bible says that jeezus came that folks might "have life more abundantly.." supposedly. but that was NOT my experience. Over the years, fundamentalist bible religion was sucking the life right out of me. The day I allowed myself to begin to think beyond the confines of that religious box, was the best day for me. That was when the dam got a crack in it & over time..it burst & there was no stopping my desire to find some answers. I had so many questions & doubts that were never allowed to even be considered while I was in the bible cult.

    I still have my struggles, but I'm OK with them, because I got free from the religious bullshit.

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    Love? I hope there's more than this..

Recent Profile Visitors

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  1. Welcome!! I'm so glad that you are freeing yourself from the vice grip of bible religion! Yaay you and your wife! As some have mentioned, consider yourself lucky you have a spouse who is willing to go with you in your journey. Of course there will be obstacles, as you mentioned how family will take it...or maybe you wont share it with everyone? You'll figure it out as you go. It was one crazy day when I realized the "god" I had believed in and gave up SO much for...was all a big fat lie. There were so many emotions, devastation, anger, grief, relief, happiness...it's definitely a journey. Good luck with yours! Stick around and let us know how you are doing.
  2. Oh I know it Bluel0bster. I looked around too and thought for a "god" to write some book where believers kill each other over issues of dogma?? WTF kind of god would write a book that would cause such anguish for it's "creation"? Seriously and from what I saw in the fundamentalist sect I was invovled in was WALLS Being built...between other christians. OTHER BELIEVERS were considered deceived and our enemies. I just thought where the hell is the supposed "unity of the faith"? There ISN'T any in christendom. What IS the supposed "faith ONCE delivered..." when nobody but nobody can agree on what the hell it is?! Jeeze! LOL So glad to be out of it. I'm just sorry it took so damn long!!
  3. I memorized this Dr. Seuss saying-Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind.

  4. Thanks for the welcome! Ha, you nailed it! LCMS. It's a very liberal church for the synod, but that's not enough for me. I grew up mostly in southern baptist and non-denominational churches, so when I moved to my current state where everyone is Catholic or Lutheran, it was quite a shock. My husband wanted me to work for change from the inside, but I didn't feel like it was my place to fight against their core beliefs. Doesn't matter that much to me now, aside from being sad for all the wonderful, talented, compassionate young women at the church. I think the church as a whole does itself a great disservice by excluding half the population from leadership just based on gender! Yeah, the Catholics are the same...no women priests. Though you can be a nun if you want. LOL.
  5. Welcome Lucynia! I am not a Christian anymore but after being raised Catholic, joining the bible cult, then leaving the bible cult- I ended up at the Lutheran LCMS. They are a lot more conservative than the ELCA-Evangelical Lutheran Churches of America. I am pretty sure the ELCA allows for women pastors & accepts gays, but the LCMS, as far as I know does not. Not that I believe any of it, but you must have been involved in the more conservative branch of Lutheranism. It's all still nonsense...hoops to jump through and you will never ever be good enough, always a "wretched sinner" *sigh*
  6. I hope you get through it Apostate. You seem smart and a thinker so I'm sure you will overcome. Hugz
  7. Seek ye first the kingdom of god and his righteousness and all these things shall be added unto you. This one sentence alone caused me to be completely unprepared for life in the real world when I entered adulthood. I just thought god would provide for my earthly needs so long as I followed his path. The disillusionment of realizing that it was a lie nearly destroyed me. Oh I heard that "seek ye the kingdom of gawd..." verse more times than I can count! It was just another excuse to stay the course and NOT question. And I understand the disillusionment because I really really tried to believe it too. Then I saw how other "true believers" were just as "worldly" as the "world"! The believers were not seeking god and his righteousness, they were focusing on feathering their nests and doing what all of the worldly people were doing...I realized I gave my time and energy to bullshit. It was devastating. All of the bible readings, studies, prayers, fasting, fellowship, etc. was a bunch of bullshit!
  8. WELCOME Lucynia! I lurked for quite some time before I started posting. It's just good to know you are NOT alone. I really benefited reading the experiences of others in cultic churches as the one I escaped. It validated what I had gone through...that is wasn't nuts! LOL Good to know. anyhow, a warm welcome and glad to have you. All the best with what you are going through. I'm glad your husband at least is understanding as many people have spouses who would be difficult to deal w/ in terms of questioning christianity. Take Care and hope to see you around more.
  9. You are told NOT to trust your OWN thoughts and inner voice. Bile verses such as "trust in the Lord with all thine heart and lean not unto thine own understanding..." it was hammered into us that we were NOT to trust our feelings, emotions, gut, inner voice, etc.... that we needed to just trust God & of course the person who is speaking for God is the Man-a-Gawd = Pastor. In time you stop trusting & listening to yourself & begin to follow blindly.
  10. Exactly Deva. Even if you got indoctrinated later you still don't realize what is happening. Mind games.
  11. Oh yeah, I heard this one...."anyone is FREE to leave this church!! there's the door!!"... and I KNEW the pastor was referring to me because I was really questioning him and he did NOT like that. (he's probably used that line on anyone daring to question...) I remember almost falling over when he said that- because FREE to leave would be a hug and a blessing. But everyone in the cult I left -knows if you DARE to leave, you will be Church Disciplined & shunned. Church discipline involves a sermon that is basically slander about you, how you "sinned" or how you didn't agree w/ the doctrine & the devil was getting into you, blah blah. But the worst was being told that you would now be an enemy of God, by leaving the True Churchtm & forsaking the assembly. I was told that God just might kill me or my family, curse us, etc. Bible verses are used to terrify you. It is very traumatic. People you thought loved you would throw you to the curb like you are garbage. and that's FREE to leave? Oh such word games that pastor would play. He would say one thing from the pulpit, but you KNEW it was the exact opposite!! The day the church votes you out, as the pastor gets up there and tells you HIS version of the story (he's the prosecution) and there is no other side to be heard! Believe me, you had BETTER vote the way pastor wants you to...I think just about every "vote" was unanimous. *sigh* There is a whole lot of pressure to conform to what the leader wants...breaks down your own will.
  12. Yes Margee. That is another one, you look around and everyone seems so...happy...content. Nobody is questioning or showing any doubt, outwardly anyhow. Everyone is "amening" to the preaching, no dissent. I used to look around at the congregation as the pastor was preaching and the look on the faces of the flock, they were eating up every word being preached. I looked and wondered, "doesn't anyone see anything wrong with this picture...does anyone feel like I do that something is not right?" Then I would blame myself that I should not be doubting like that! I would then try to line up my reality with what i was being told reality should be- according to the buybull. It is very difficult to overcome because there are so many webs to untangle to get yourself out. We all here at Ex-C should pat ourselves on the back that we escaped!
  13. Once I became brainwashed in my mind the only information that seemed valid was from the Man of God = the pastor. He even did sermons on "the authority of the pastor"...so that limited my mind to looking at any information, especially if it conflicted what the mog=manAgawd says! Very hard to overcome...somehow the pastor gets inside people's heads that THEY are the only real authority so in your brainwashed head, even if you hear information that sounds good and right, if it doesn't line up with what the pastor teaches it is dismissed. I'd love to write more, but im soooo tired. This is a very interesting topic you bring up RaLeah!
  14. Welcome to Ex-C AndieBird. It can be difficult to know what to do when it comes to family, being shunned and religion. My bet is go with what your gut is telling you. Think about it, weigh the consequences, which it seems like you are already doing that. If I could share some of my own experience. I too was raised Catholic. In some regards the doctrine seemed liberal, for ex. I was never told I was going to burn in hell. On the other hand I was made to feel guilt a whole lot! Guilt that someone on the other side of the world was starving because I wouldn't eat my liver (UGH) guilt over natural feelings of sexuality, guilt over missing church on sunday "God does SO much for you & you can't even give him 1 hour of your time on Sunday?!" When my mom would "shame shame double shame, devil's gonna know your name..." and when we didn't want to do our homework, but instead we wanted to watch Gilligan's Island, the TV was the devil! That stuff got to me, I think I was sensitive? Ah well.... So knowing your own children, how do you think they would take some of that indoctrination? I must say some of my worst memories were from CCD- and it wasn't the dogma. I LIKED hearing how "Jesus loved me"! Instead it was how mean and nasty the kids in my class were! You see, I went to the public school from the git-go and to see such hypocrisy with supposed Catholic-Jesus followers actually planted the seed in me that..."maybe there are BETTER Jesus lovers out there??" Which led me into joining a bible cult in the future as I searched for a better brand of Christianity. I totally believe it was the early indoctrination with a combination of seeing the hypocrisy within the Catholic church...and in hopes of finding "true believers" I ended up in something that was WAY worse than the Catholics dared to be. Lucky me. /not Everyone sees things differently & has different experiences, mine is just one. I'm not you, but if I really didn't believe that stuff and felt it could end up doing harm to my kids, I would not send them to CCD. Go with what you think is the best. Take care & All the best!
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