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RaLeah last won the day on February 19 2014

RaLeah had the most liked content!

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About RaLeah

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    Strong Minded

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    New York, NY
  • Interests
    Books, politics, science, economics, social issues, science fiction and fantasy
  • More About Me
    I deconverted from Independent Baptist in my 20s, and I know the Bible well enough to answer any trivia question on it. I have an atheist husband who is ex-Catholic and a cat who was never a Christian. Our families are still believers.

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?

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  1. You're totally right about jealousy for the certainty and passion. But it's hard to be jealous of all that energy focused toward something so totally fake... And ultimately empty. I remember Christians saying that atheists have empty lives. But now I think that Christians, underneath who are trying hard not to doubt, who block out their brains, they are denying how empty the lie they're living really is. Atheism is truth. It faces reality. It doesn't take comfort in the beautiful lies. It acknowledges facts and reality. I'm not jealous anymore, but I used to be. Mostly because I a
  2. Sorry it ended up posting in the wrong section. I haven't posted in a while, so I must've lost a little of my navigational savviness.
  3. For YEARS I had dreams... nightmares really... about talking to my parents about my non-belief. I've now mentioned it, subtly and carefully, more than a few times, and they seem to know, deep down, where I stand (don't go to church, won't ever go again, don't believe the way they do politically or religiously) but they still seem to have amnesia when we talk in person. I just calmly, gently remind I won't attend the Christmas service when they invite me during a visit, etc. I'm lucky that we all just want to get along. I know they worry about my soul. I don't rub it in or antagonize. But
  4. Thought this might be of interest... http://gawker.com/growing-up-fundie-the-painful-impact-of-conservative-r-1716122437
  5. Some people have an emotional bullshit detector. Others have a logical bullshit detector. Doesn't matter as long as the detector works. You got out = Proof it works.
  6. I have to admit, if I were you, I'd find a time and way to grill my mother about my father's family. I would start out telling her I love her, she did a great job by herself as head of household, I'm super proud of her rising to the challenge of being a single mom, etc. I have some questions though, and not because I want something MORE than her, I just want to fill in the blanks of my heritage. No one will every replace her or mean more to me than her. And then I'd ask. Try to be as judgment free as possible. Because, honestly, suicide can be sort of contageous. Not genetic so much as tr
  7. "An ancient book of myths (many of them quite brutal in nature) written by superstitious primitive humans, whose texts have largely been disproved by science as well as being historically inaccurate, is still believed by many modern-day people to be literally true in whole or in part, despite the fact that the texts contradict themselves, condemn the majority of humans who were ever born to eternal torment, and also claim that the God that condemns those people (as well as commanding the genocides of many others) is love." I don't think love means what they think it means.
  8. I had my first OBE right after my appendix was taken out. (I was on Tylenol-3 with codeine to manage the post-op pain.) I dreamed I floated out of myself and out my window into the sky and floated up into some trees and every color was so super bright and vivid and it FELT really good to be so light and happy and weightless, and then when I decided I wanted to wake up, I was back in my bedroom looking down at the foot of my bed and saw a girl with her eyes closed lying on a blue pillow, and I realized my perspective was from the foot of my bed looking at myself sleeping. I woke up in surprise,
  9. This would've been my reply: Oh no, Dad! Your argument just proved to me that Greek mythology is true too! (Flawed characters--not just the humans, because even the gods themselves are flawed--and a complex underworld and rules for rescuing someone from it, etc. By your logic, dad, men couldn't have made that up either. And lots of other mythology pre-dates Christianity, so I guess it's even more true than the Bible, huh?)
  10. Well, they're all pre-atheists. Because dead people can't believe in god anymore.
  11. That is SUCH GOOD NEWS!!!!! Thank you for keeping us in the loop. You've been in my thoughts a lot lately, and I'm so glad for the update!
  12. I am not so cynical to think they didn't have real feelings of love for you; but their fear is greater. If you hope and expect validation from people who have a high stake in not validating your current path, then you will be disappointed sometimes. That's okay. They're human. It's hard for you. It's hard for them. (Who knows? Your pastor might be having secret doubts himself, but he has too much at stake to "come out" whereas you don't... but perhaps he couldn't really engage with you because of his own suppressed insecurities.) When you can see other people as just humans trying to
  13. You know, if you're really interested in taking out the fear, superstition, and paranoia power of these stories.... You can research hoaxes and especially mass hysteria. There's a lot to learn about our brains, and studying psychology really gave me the answers I needed to not be bothered about stories like this. Our brains can trick us. We can buy into ghosts or demons or hauntings and really freak ourselves out. The more attention we pay to it, the more "valid" those fears become and manifest in our behaviors and take root in our beliefs. The Salem Witch Trials were one of the worst
  14. You don't have to have all the answers. Not right now, and not ever. You can think of life as a journey and you gather information as you go along, and enjoy yourself along the way. It can be jarring at first, going from the projected "certainty" of Christianity to standing on new ground. (Think of it like stepping into a boat and getting used to the new balance, or stepping out of a boat onto solid ground again... it takes a few steps to get your "sea legs" or readjust to being on ground that isn't moving.) The difference now is that you don't HAVE to know everything with absolute c
  15. Thank you for sharing this beautiful tribute to your wife with us, Bob. She sounds like an amazing woman, and I hope you'll continue to remember all the happy memories you made together. I also wish you lot of good wishes in staying close to the family while staying true to yourself. It sounds like you've already done a remarkable job of that. Love and hugs to you!
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