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RealityCheck last won the day on July 17 2016

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About RealityCheck

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  • Birthday 03/31/1984

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?

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  1. I burned my bible while taking the lord's name in vein. To those of you on the fence, try this, you will see that god will neither strike you down or give a damn because he doesn't exists.
  2. There is nothing worse for mental illness than adding religion to the mix. I have some breathtakingly infuriating stories from my church telling it's members to get off their meds and avoid proper treatment which I've posted in other pasts of the forums. It's seems you can't communicate about this issue with your parents without their toxic Christian indoctrination. Do you have anyone else you can talk or other means of seeking help while you're back with them?
  3. People change, sometimes for the better and sometimes for worse. 20+ years will make a girl that you once fell in love with utterly unrecognizable, this is especially true if she's been infected by the god virus and possibly traumatized due to a horrible marriage. The past is something that's best put away, you're sacrificing romantic possibilities in the present for someone that for all intents and purposes is gone. The most amazing women in my life didn't show up till I was past 30 and I look at the people from high school with complete indifference now.
  4. Later in the bible, you'll find verses (Ezekiel 18:20) stating that the child shall not pay for the sins of the father. Not that it matters though as the whole book is one contradiction after another as anyone who's even casually studied it knows. The original writers of Genesis just needed a reason to state that we had a built in defect. Without this, they couldn't sell us their solution (atonement for sins) so thus, the concept of our sinful nature would have taken root. Christianity wouldn't have survived with the fear of hell dangling over it's believers and you will find that other successful religions tend to have some sort of punishment in the afterlife for not adhering to their rules.
  5. There is a new development now, that is my mother is starting to lose her mind. She claimed that my dad came and visited her today, she felt "a heavy presence" upon here. So yeah, something else for me to worry about.
  6. I remember when I was in a young adult prayer group. One of the guy's mother suddenly passed away and the pastor was formulating a strategy to witness to people in such a situation. I understand that some of these people are insatiable and have no shame whatsoever. Therefore I have to keep a close eye on the entire thing for such problematic individuals, the good news is that most of my father's friends aren't particularly religious. However, I don't want a repeat performance of my grandfather's service.
  7. Furthermore, my father despised religion, he was marginally catholic in is earlier days but then realized the absurdity of it all. He also saw enough of the world to realize that there is no god watching us. I know that he sighed in relief when I deconverted, happy that I left such absurdity behind. It would be a disgrace if there is another wannabe preacher in the service again.
  8. I think you guys might need a bit more context to my statement. I don't mind something like "we'll pray for your family" and whatnot, I know they mean well. I also know that people cope in different ways. However, I'm referring to what happened when my grandfather passed. The service was supposed to be about recalling his life and the impact he had on others. Some jackass, who wasn't even family decided to hijack the service and give what was for all intents and purposes a sermon. I think he came in there with an agenda, to target emotionally vulnerable people and give them the "good news". Yeah, I'm not going to tolerate that this time.
  9. Well, now comes the memorial service and the inevitable religious bullshit that's going to be spewed forth. I might just lose my shit if that happens.
  10. My logic and rationality is all I have at the moment, I try to hold on to it the best I can despite how dire the situation gets. If you don't, the world is full of predators that will use your own emotions and irrationality to devour you. This is a life lesson that took me years to learn the hard way.
  11. The burden of dealing with the aftermath falls solely on me. My brothers are nowhere to be found and unreachable, they'll likely only find out our father passed when they show up 6 months down the road wanting something again. I don't particular feel compelled to try again as they couldn't be bothered the countless times my dad was in the hospital over the last few years. My mother is not in a place mentally to deal with much right now, she lacks the emotional fortitude that I have. The funeral home and their sleazy sales pitch they're tossing at me is making me lose my shit. My father wanted a simple cremation and service and nothing more, the costs of course are going to fall entirely on me.
  12. I'll be rather blunt with everyone, the death was a horrible one to witness. I don't think I'll ever be the same after this, no way in hell. I feel rather sick to my stomach as I relive everything in my mind over and over. Yes, loved ones have passed away before but I've never seen it in person...and especially not like this.
  13. Christians who convert others are merely at it to gain Jesus points. They get that reinforcing rush of dopamine that comes with accomplishing the work that their indoctrination requires of them. They do not give a damn about the convert nor have any interest in being there for them during difficulties after the conversion. That is the job of the Pastor, the main repository of the god virus tasked with keeping the hosts infected. I wish I would a been a more perceptive 19 year old and have avoided the trap but then again, I was all emotion and no logic back then. I should have realized that these people only cared about stroking their egos.
  14. My father passed away Friday evening. He started breathing heavily and passed out on the couch not breathing and without a pulse. Emergency services had me doing CPR on him while the paramedics arrived but my efforts and theirs were in vain. In a very short span of time I saw him embrace oblivion, which perhaps is the only mercy this indifferent universe gives us in the end since he was constantly in pain the last few years. There is no comfort of seeing him again, I do not subscribe to ideas that consciousness transcends our brains nor will I delude myself due to the current situation. Also, it's not the dead that trouble me at the moment but the living. My brothers are nowhere to be found, they'll only find out about our father's passing the next time they show up wanting something. I don't feel compelled to track them down as they couldn't be bothered when he was in the hospital multiple times. My mother is too hysterical to deal with the aftermath of the situation. Both of them were irresponsible financially and did not prepare for this situation thus the costs and burden of the funeral home will fall solely on me. I can't even afford to stop and feel anything at the moment. We're just a sliver of consciousness in an infinite void of oblivion that extends before our birth to the beginning of the universe and after our demise to the heat death of the cosmos. We waste that sliver on mostly meaningless garbage, be it religion, politics, or some other worthless pursuit. We can't just be direct and say what we mean, we carry things unsaid to our death beds. At least the void of nothingness will wash us of our regrets in the end...
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