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About DarkHorse

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  • Location
    In my own world.
  • Interests
    Anything adventurous. At other times, anything quiet and lazy.
  • More About Me
    I used to be a born again Christian, but always had niggling little doubts pop up every now and then, that I would push away. It was only when I started questioning and reading up on other things, that I started to realize Christianity may not be all I was taught to believe it was. I'm still in the transition phase, but I've realized that the bible is not the book I thought it was. Careful study of the passages and words added a lot to my questioning and becoming uncomfortable.

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    Not yet sure.

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  1. Not being allowed to express negative emotions, especially anger is why I believe the majority of Christians have mental health issues such as depression. It's also conducive to other diseases. It feels good to not feel guilty about feeling these emotions.
  2. I'm still in the terrible anger stage. I feel like snapping at everyone who even mentions the bible, religion and Christianity in a good way. I also feel I gave up a hell of a lot in my life due to that religion, and some of the crap that happened to me was because I was told that standing up for yourself isn't necessary, let people treat you like dirt. "God will stand up for you". All the guilt, frustration, condemnation and confusion became a part of me, and I still feel the after effects of that poison. Thankfully, it's slowly leaving my system. But what causes the most anger? The fact that
  3. You're right. I detest lying, and never thought I'd be the one doing it. It's not fair on her, and it's not fair on me. I'm working on telling her the truth..It's feeling less and less scary thinking of doing it, and I know that soon I'll be ready. I'm making peace with the fact that whatever happens, will be for the best.
  4. I'm happy you had a good experience this year, Deidre. I've been hiding from everyone, lol.
  5. I hear you! I'm also glad to be free of those damn heavy things, but get so mad that those I love the most still have theirs on. Every time someone posts another "praise jesus" or "how awesome is our god?" picture/quote, I feel like banging my head against the wall, and screaming at them through the screen. 99% of my friends and family are still christians, so I can't run away and hide, lol. Maybe we should hold "cell groups", for the sole purpose of attempting to deconvert people. Hey, if christians can do it in order to pursuade former athiests or members of other religions to turn to christ
  6. I agree with this. I've been doing a lot of thinking, and I've been realizing this more and more. I can stick around and wait for her to change, but that's not how a relationship should be, and besides, what if nothing changes? Both partners should bring out the best in one another and ACCEPT one another completely. I'm going to have a talk with her once I have everything I want to say firmly in my mind, and go from there. Thanks guys and girls.
  7. You went, you tried, and you're a good friend for doing that. But now you've seen it's not for you, and it's your prerogative to decide not to go again. Don't let your friends pressure you into it. I was taught about that unequally yoked thing when I was still in bible school. You aren't even allowed to be with someone who doesn't share the same beliefs as you. So if you're with someone who belongs to one of the other christian denominations, that's also considered unequally yoked, and potentially dangerous. Bunch of morons.
  8. That would get a few confused stares, lol! I'm try it next time!
  9. I don't want to survive. I want to live.

    1. TheRedneckProfessor


      Life should be enjoyed, not endured.

    2. Deidre


      Agree! In the Christian life, you're living for "another life" and I think that is why so many Christians lose happiness in the here and now. :/

  10. When I first posted this thread, I felt a little silly the next day letting all my "secrets" loose here for so many people to read. I'm not used to being so open, especially in a public place, so for those of you that replied, thanks for not judging.
  11. A friend recently wrote the same to me, and I just said "you too". I still say "bless you" when someone sneezes though, and then only afterward I'll realize what I just said. Guess it will take a while to get that one out of my system. I like your comeback, R.
  12. Thanks everyone for taking the time to reply. FreeThinker, I hear what you're saying about seeing a therapist. I've been wanting to go see one for many years now, but it's not financially possible at this moment. The medical we have in this country, only covers 2 sessions, which I've done before, but couldn't continue after that. Those 2 sessions didn't do much, as you can imagine, there just wasn't enough time. I've tried finding where I can get free or much cheaper sessions, but that has been a dead end. For now. Midniterider, pretending is terrible. I hate it. I don't feel it's fai
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