Single Status Update
As I approach March 18th, I had a good laugh this evening when I used to think of how I would pray before any major event. All the time I used to spend praying for a positive outcome, never once thinking about how selfish it was for KNOWING my often trivial prayer would be answered while someone else in the world with an ACTUAL prayer request would likely be denied. Sometimes I wish I had figured it out sooner, and those times I wound up succeeding was due to my own doing. Like I hope next weekend will be.
On the 18th, I test for my 1st degree black belt in my martial arts style. It will likely be a 5-6 hour ordeal pushing my, and others, physical, mental, and emotional limits. Everything from running, balancing, sparring, technique, to managing energy levels, trying to regulate the body to not use as much hydration since we cannot drink anything during, and finding that spot in the mind to crawl into to ignore the pain and fatigue.
It's eight years in the making for me, and since that last test - I believe I am in better shape now than I was then, despite being older. Probably a tad bit wiser too, and I get good praise from my own instructors on how well I am doing. My senior instructor is a tough taskmaster, he pushes us (especially those like me, the lower ranked instructors) to better ourselves consistently, but it's only because he expects the best out of us, and no one - including himself as he'll admit, does anything perfect. We can all be better, and he'll be the first to admit it for himself. That is someone I can respect, follow, and learn from with confidence. He is among the ones who has said I look very good in technique and feels I am ready for this challenge.
Years ago, I would pray for a favorable outcome. Now, I'll just have to rely on my skills, my talent, and my hopeful endurance of my body holding out. Any good vibes and so forth is always appreciated as I take a huge step forward in my own journey toward realizing a goal once again. Have a great night everyone!
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Yeah, I received from critique from my chief instructor tonight on the part that was giving me issues mechanically. She reassured me it's not so much the beauty of the kick, just more that I know the form and don't short change it, and added as long as I make an attempt and do it correctly, it will not be docked on my test. They'd rather the kick look ugly (because it can be improved upon later) and done right, than shorting it to make the kick look good. Proper form > beauty. I have to pivot on my bad knee, which they both know about. So, it's do my best and do it right - everything can be fixed later.
So, that lifted my spirits a lot.
I can pray for you, though? You got this, keep working hard!
Hah, if you want Deidre. I certainly cannot stop you