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knightcore last won the day on October 23 2017

knightcore had the most liked content!

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About knightcore

  • Rank
    Strong Minded
  • Birthday 02/24/1994

Profile Information

  • Gender
  • Interests
    Drawing, Reading, Writing, Video Games
  • More About Me
    Pretty gay, pretty pagan, pretty open. I don't like to deal with gods anymore than necessary. If you ever need to let off some steam I always have an open ear!

    Aspiring hairstylist and educator, I'm not on a whole lot because I barely have time for myself these days.

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    Who knows

Recent Profile Visitors

1,503 profile views
  1. And this is why being fat isn't ok

    This is honestly the most healthy way to go about dieting. All the stuff that restricts you crave what you can't have and cheat days make you feel guilty. By allowing yourself to eat things you want but not in excess you're creating a positive reenforcement with food rather than a negative one! @Fweethawt carbs aren't the enemy! It's good to have some of them. Going completely free of something in a diet is only going to cause a lot of frustration. Another thing I would recommend is not changing too many things at once and introducing healthier alternatives into your diet gradually. I hope that you can find a food plan that works for you!
  2. How deal with guilt of not returning to church?

    Fill you Sundays with things that you actually enjoy, even if it's just sleeping in or reading. It may seem forced at first but you'll start to associate it with a time for peace or joy rather than something to feel guilt over.
  3. In your honest opinion

    I'm curious, in cases where abuse or trauma isn't as present, do you amount it to a lack of faith?
  4. Got a few Trillions to donate?

    Hearing about all this has been one thing but seeing it written down is core shaking honestly
  5. Odd Combinations of Beliefs

    Homophobia is more of a cultural thing than a religious thing imo. But also yes, I've met a lot of Christians who believe hell isn't real, or that core tenants of the bible aren't true.
  6. Is there anyone there? Oh! Hello!

    Welcome and happy (belated?) birthday!!!! There's a few other pagans including myself floating around here and there's a pretty good section for talking about that stuff too!
  7. Thoughts on Jack Chick?

    This one was the original spoof tho Even though this one was my fav
  8. Thoughts on Jack Chick?

    I didn't read a whole lot of Chick Tracts but I still think the meme made out of one of them is funny This one.
  9. What Are You Listening To? (Music)

    Just got Against Me!'s latest album on vinyl. I was supposed to see them live last year but missed out because of health Someday Laura Jane Grace!!!
  10. Morality

    Hey Learnagain, welcome to the board and congrats on starting your deconversion! You're asking a lot of questions that I did as I was deconverting, and most people here have already given the answer I would. I'm not super good at stats, but since you provided some anecdotes I thought I might as well! You see, I'm transgender. Always have been even if I didn't know it or have the words to articulate it. When I deconverted it took me a while to come to terms with it, about two years. I'd already been struggling with it for five by that point. Suppressing a part of me that I knew to be true was incredibly harmful to my mental health, and it wasn't until I was able to start outwardly expressing myself that I saw my health on the rise. I'm just now getting to the point where I can see a professional about my transition. Because in the health community it is viewed as something that needs to be regulated still. I'm required to go through therapy and psych evaluation. I'm required to jump through a lot of hoops to get to where I need to be. It's not that I can snap my fingers and magically be on hormones. I have to work and convince people that I am who I say I am. Being trans is still viewed as a mental illness by many. At the end of the day I can't prove that my dysphoria isn't some deep traumatization to you. If you have never experienced it yourself you're not going to understand. And that's okay. But don't go slinging around terms you don't have proof for yourself. I also am on Prozac. I refused to take meds for a long looong time because of my parents and the church. Prayer and will should be enough right? It wasn't until I got fired from my job and was in bed for almost three months straight that I made myself go see someone. And even then, I had done massive amounts of research on it. I was so so afraid it would fuck me up. For me personally, they did. The first ones at least. They weren't a good match at all. What I'm on now though? Has helped me through a lot, to the point where I'm almost done with my license requirements to become a stylist and where I can go to work regularly. Hell I can even leave my house without breaking down into a mess now. Meds are not the answer for everyone, you're right. A lot of doctors peddle prescription because they're paid commission to do so. It's good to be wary of that! Just as it's good to be wary of anything. But denouncing meds as a whole is also dangerous. My advice is like many people's here. Read people's accounts, look at reports, and be critical! You don't just turn into a liberal overnight. There's a lot of people on here who do not agree with me, but we still get along. There's also MANY non believers who are conservative and not just on here. There's plenty of them on youtube, I promise.
  11. I'm almost 1000 hours through cosmetology school! I have 500 more to go but this is a really big accomplishment for me. I had to drop out for five months and I also struggle with acute depression so I am very proud of myself right now.

    1. knightcore


      I'll also be entering a national competition in the upcoming months and am VERY excited about that!

    2. Citsonga


      Good luck


    3. Margee


      Congratulations hon! 43 years here. You will never be without a job! (hug)

  12. Christian counseling made me put off my recovery from grief because pastors didn't want to admit they were the ones who caused it in the first place.
  13. Hello from an angry former missionary child

    Hey welcome!!! Also a former MK. I'm stateside right now but lived in Western Europe for a good chunk of my childhood. Definitely understand the anger. I'm not on here a whole lot anymore but if you ever need to talk about things you're free to message me
  14. Constant Inadequacy

    I know I don't post here very much anymore, but I'm kind of having a breakthrough that I'm sure many of you have had but it's really hitting me hard right now and I don't really have anywhere else I can talk about this. I posted right before Christmas that I've had a talk with my mom and she told me she would never accept me as her son because I'm her daughter etc etc etc I'll link that whole thread later if anyone wants. But I've felt for a long time that my parents love is kind of performative even though I know they do love me. But a lot of times it feels like they only love me out of Christian obligation. Like they need to show me they love me because it's what Christ would do and they might be able to bring me back to faith that way. But I've also realized that I've... literally never been more important to them than their faith. I struggle a lot already feeling like I'm not enough. I'm the oldest of four, and I get ignored a lot because I was up until last year the most low maintenance of my siblings. Everything I want to do is always put to the side in favor of the others, I'm asked to compromise, I'm asked to be the one to step up and that the hit etc. I was struggling today because my dad who has been promising for a year to come install some shelves for me and reiterated that promise around Christmas has put it of again in favor of doing things that he found more important. I only really get one day a week off from everything and I always plan it around him when he comes up and for him to cancel again on me was just... a lot today. It's not really the shelves, it's just that it is once again, a promise he hasn't kept. Like when he wouldn't come to my games, or put off something he promised me, or told me flat out something else was more pressing. I'm used to it by now but I guess I had hoped maybe he would keep his promise for once. I've been spiralling all day long and it just hit me that it's always been the case that things come before me and that maybe a lot of that inadequacy also has to do with being told by our church that I'm insignificant. That nothing is more important than faith or god, and that nothing I do has meaning if it's not for god. My parents have told me much of the same. This post rambles a lot, I'm sorry I'm very manic right now and I can't organize my thoughts. I guess the TL;DR is that I realized that I've been told my whole life I'm not important and today I realized a lot of that stems from my family's faith and beliefs.
  15. My Parents Still Love Me

    Ah I see this thread is still open. I know I don't post a lot anymore but I think this will be my final update on this situation for a while. I'm at my parents for Christmas and I had a very long discussion with my mom in the car on the way here about my... everything I guess. Bottom line that she reiterated the most is that she will never view me as her son and neither will my father, but they still love me. I really believe that and while I'm at a much more stable point than I was in March it still is very very painful. There was a lot more too the conversation but it was mostly excuses and explanations and I'm too tired to recount all of them. I love my parents very much and my gender identity is just something we will probably never see eye to eye on. I think I've finally reached the acceptance phase of this journey with them even though I've known the truth from the beginning. I'm sad of course, and hurt. But I understand and I'm going to work on moving forward with them. There's no point in cutting off from them at this time. I'm going to do my best to enjoy the season with them. I hope that everyone else also can find peace this season.