Riven

Regular Member
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    105
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Riven last won the day on June 21

Riven had the most liked content!

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About Riven

  • Rank
    Thinker

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Location
    Pacific Northwest
  • Interests
    music, guitar, travel, sci-fi, writing, reading, thinking for myself
  • More About Me
    ex-sheep, ex-lay leader, ex-worship leader, ex-everything. Trying to find out who I am, now that the guilt and shame are gone. (Can I really watch Game of Thrones without being judged now? Answer: YES!) I'm a writer and publisher who loves the outdoors and traveling. My part-time job is recovering from 25 years of evangelical mind control. Your turn! Reach out and say hi!

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    The Invisible Pink Unicorn. (Glitter be upon Her!)

Recent Profile Visitors

931 profile views
  1. Wow... just. wow. Never underestimate the power of "gossip prayer." I've been witness to it countless times! (If that's indeed what happened.) I'm still going to church too, but a very liberal one (open and affirming) due to my husband still wanting to attend. I'm happy that it's at least Methodist. I don't think they care that I don't believe. I do get why you're going (and I do remember you discussing it previously). I'm going for the same reason, but thank goodness we got out of the fundamentalist church we were in. At least I have that. No self-respecting evangelical would be caught dead in a United Methodist church! It's amazing to watch from the inside, right? The couple responded very even-highhandedly, considering the church's over the top response. It would be great to send them a card -- even anonymously!
  2. Riven

    Bundled Belief Systems

    This is so profound for me, in that I've not considered the "bundle" idea. You're right, we do accept the "package." I've come to the conclusion, even though my deconversion and recovery from religion is still ongoing, that I'm not interested in "peddlers of hate" from any organization. On the atheist side as well of the Christian side, there are plenty of those. At this point, I just want to live in peace, and enjoy what life I have left. I've give too much, for too long, to those with agendas that don't match my own. Gone are the days of meekly swallowing the bullshit, just to be accepted -- no matter who is selling it.
  3. Riven

    Holy Donkey Genitals Batman!

    My new life verse: Ezekiel 23:20 "There she lusted after her lovers, whose genitals were like those of donkeys and whose emission was like that of horses." So who says there's not great material in the Bible?!! 😂 Best answer I found in a Christian (yes, Christian) questions forum: "Because man cares about genital size, and man created God in his image." Glad that got cleared up! 🐴 🙄🤯
  4. Riven

    God....and Prayers.

    I agree @Lerk it is sad. I think I was in that place in my last years as a Christian. I couldn't look at the *actual* God of the Bible, because that would mean I had to look at my "Good God" as one that ordered genocide, yet was still "good." That feels intellectually dishonest, so it's easier not to look at it. In the end, I could hardly look anywhere else. All I could see was inconsistencies in the way I, and others, saw this "good" God. I've been going through a really tough time these past few weeks. I'm slowly realizing that mind control worked on me, for a long, long time. Now I have to pick up the pieces, and live to the fullest, for as long as I have. At least I'm free.
  5. I actually believed "god" was listening to every single thought I had. I'd go to bed every night, running over my entire day (including thoughts) and pray for forgiveness for everything that was considered a sin. I lived this way for 25 years. I'll probably spend another 25 trying to figure out why I believed this.
  6. Riven

    If

    Google "process addiction." That's what you're describing with the phone and sugary food. It shares some characteristics with a substance/chemical addiction, but it's different. You sound like you already know it's a problem. If you're not open to therapy, maybe doing some online research will help.
  7. Riven

    For Ex-Christian Women

    Well, speaking as a former worship team member..... and I would like to note that was not allowed to be a worship team LEADER....... I'm pretty happy that I don't have to play guitar under the leadership of someone with far less talent than I have. Of course, I'm not playing guitar right now.... lots to work out there... but I digress. I no longer have to worry that as a woman, I'm not qualified to teach a man. I no longer have to hide the fact that I'm divorced from a short-lived, abusive marriage 18 years ago, that evidently, disqualifies me for even participating on said worship team. I no longer have to have to couch every idea I come up with as "probably not a good idea but...." so I'm being properly submissive to my male church leaders. I no longer have only knitting, sewing, and scrapbooking events to choose from in my spare time, because evidently, that's the deepest Christian women go in ministry ideas. That's just the first things that came to me in the moments I took to write this. I'm sure there's more.
  8. Riven

    Spring is Coming

    @JenniferG thank you! I just looked him up on Youtube! This sounds like it would be perfect for where I am right now.
  9. You know, I have a theory about this.... I think it's got to be that Christianity operates and survives by teaching "black and white" thinking. Something is either "all good" or "all bad." Therefore, something is either "of God" or "of the Devil." This stage of cognitive development is usually grown out of in early adolescence (although I do know some adults that operate this way). It's an immature way to view the world. But then again, Jesus did say that were to "be like little children." Mission accomplished.
  10. Riven

    God....and Prayers.

    @Positivist thank you! I'm reading up a storm these days, and I am devouring anything and everything to help me understand how I was so entrenched inside this religion for so many years. I'm off to Amazon to put it on my Wishlist!
  11. Bingo. So, the (circular reasoning) is this: God is not to be questioned. He is God. When he does horrible things like, oh, say... genocide...ordering murder.... then it's "righteous anger." When we do that, it's a sin. God doesn't make mistakes, ever, but we are failed human beings the minute we come out of the womb (original sin). We're screwed, and God is never wrong. I am so glad I'm out of that manipulative mind-you-know-what. Good riddance.
  12. @TruthSeeker0 I relate to this SO much. I had (what I thought were) meaningful, close relationships in my church. When I left, so did the friendships. I would say I was shocked that happened, but I used to be one of them. I know why they don't want to associate with non-Christians in close friendships. It says a hell of a lot about them and the fear-based religion they are in. I would of still been friends, in a heartbeat. I'm not a shallow person, and yet I evidently had shallow friendships, easily dropped. It sucks.
  13. Riven

    An Update On My Life

    I'm a hockey fan, so I like you already! (Go Kings Go!) 🏒 I'm so sorry to hear about your marriage -- that's got to be so hard. I just started listening to Humanize Me and I absolutely love it. I found it by accident from another related podcast, and I was surprised to learn about Bart and his exit from Christianity. I had no idea! I have a connection to his father through a good friend of mine, who is good friends with Tony. I've met him on various occasions when he was visiting my friend. That was in the 1990s and I can remember thinking "how liberal" he was. That's hilarious now... but that was the mindset of my very evangelical mind. Listening to Bart, and hearing his story has been amazing. I want to see the documentary he and his dad did, but haven't plunked down the $14.99 that Amazon wants. But soon. Hang in there and thanks for blogging. I so appreciate it.
  14. Riven

    Spring is Coming

    I may look into the Yoga thing. Thanks for explaining how you've been finding your way in that. I'd be interested in the Youtube channel (if you happen to see my comment!) I also am at the point of feeling that the soul is a made up invention of man. I don't have any spiritual desire at all. I may grow out of that with time, and maybe find something, but who knows. I'll tell you one benefit that I immediately had -- enjoying each day and appreciating those around me. I'm much more in the moment, probably because I now realize this life is all I get. And weirdly, I don't see that as a bad thing -- rather -- it's freeing!
  15. I hear you @offtheromanroad This is actually one of the core issues that caused me to walk out the door. The very people that Jesus hung out with are demonized as "the other" in Western Christianity. It's sickening. I have trouble getting past the rage some days. Of course, I'm fresh off the turnip truck as they say, so I'm still raw.