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Everything posted by DarkBishop

  1. In this respect you remind me a lot of my uncle. He doesn't want to be labeled either. And I don't think I really do either. I've said it before in other posts that I don't think there is a category I really fit into anymore. I'm just tring to take in aspects from other beliefs. Who knows maybe there is a little truth in all of them. Ya just have to find those common threads that cross theologies.
  2. I need you to message me on pantheism. I've read a few sites but I'm not quite understanding the theory behind it. Like what's there thoughts on after death, what is that spiritual energy we are able to tap into? I took a test to see if I had pantheist beliefs on one site. I was like 80% dualistic pantheist because I believed in a individual conscious spirit. Not that i put any faith in an online spiritual placement test. Just curious about the details of the belief.
  3. Ive only told my wife and kids. My wife seems to be able to look past the issues that were just to much for me to accept. But my mom and dad are very religious it's not that I think they would disown me. I just know it would hurt them. I would rather them live out the rest of their days thinking what they wanna think and not knowing the truth. But everyone's situation is different. Weigh the pros and cons. If you can deal with the cons then go for it. DB
  4. Yes I posted that. I don't like the "liberal/progressive" movement either. I thoroughly support and respect everyones rights outlined in the constitution. But neither of out current major political parties do. It is really sad to see this going on in america. I would love to sit down over a few drinks and shoot the shit with ya on politics and religion. DB
  5. I know it's crazy right? I blamed athiests and progressives for everything that was wrong with america and the world. I felt we had lost God's favor because we had turned our back on him by taking prayer out of schools, taking the ten commandments out of courthouses, and all the other anti religion movements athiests fight for with govt. Now I find myself getting pissed off because christians are pushing their beliefs on everyone's kids. Not just their own. You really don't understand why people do things until you've walked in their shoes. DB
  6. Diedre, I hate to say it but I'm am honestly not optimistic about your faith lasting. You have been down this road before and youve seen what we see. You already know that the bible is a fairy tale. I have had the "Holy Ghost" experiences myself. Being in a church service so fired up that you can't contain it. Shouting at the top of your lungs. Saying Amen with tears streaming down your face. I've been there and I've done that. But when I did it I whole heartedly believed what the bible was saying. If you have went into it not believing everything that's being taught your eventually gonna lose that Amen. I may be wrong, it wouldn't be the first time. And in your case I hope I am. It's just hard for me to see how anyone can stay on fire for God and stay filled with the Holy Ghost and have doubts about what is being taught and having doubts about God's power. Normally I would be happy for someone who found something to believe in. But in this situation I'm afraid your just going to have to go through the hurt and anger you felt before. The Holy Ghost filling is an intense spiritual high. I admit that. It is a spiritual energy that pours off of the believers. That high is also addictive. Ya just want more and more. But what happens when God isn't making good on his promises anymore? Or when you start having doubts and you can't feel it anymore? Or a few more years down the road when the new wears off? I have felt that energy in more than one religion. And I believe that a true believer in any religion attains the ability to tap into that energy. But that feeling doesn't make the foundations of that religion any less false. I apologise for being pessimistic. Just don't wanna see ya have to go through this crap twice. Dark Bishop
  7. It will probably take me years to know what I believe spiritually. I've said it before and I will say it now. I just can't believe that there is nothing. I know most on this website will chalk it up to the newness of my deconversion slowly winging myself on the dependency of "something greater". And maybe that is the case, only time will tell. But I don't necessarily know that there is a "something greater" just a "something". I know I'm talking in riddles. Believe me it confuses me aswell. But there isn't an instruction book anymore to tell me what the details are. In my short time as a practicing Wiccan before I devoted my life to "the lies of christ" for 15 years er so. I truly appreciated the theory of reincarnation. I really really REALLY! want that to be true because in my eyes this life is the "greater" and if there is an afterlife it's just part of the "something" trying to get back to Life. Also I've really screwed the pooch as far as my health so far. If I knew what I knew now. All that time wasted in church would have been devoted to working out and making my body healthy so I can live longer. I hope it's not to late to repair any damage I've done by neglecting that. I'm trying to lose weight now. I'm also contemplating joining my sons karate studio. I am finding a new interest in ancient symbology in pagan religions. In my studies on the Egyptian God's I noticed the Ankh and it's similarity to the cross. (Probably not a coincidence) And thought it was even more interesting that the Ankh represented "life". A star shows up a lot in religious mythology. I think about the Five pointed pentagram with each point representing a different element of life. Earth, Fire, Water, Air, and Spirit. I have also held a fascination with runes. Burning incense is also a common aspect across most every faith. I love me some incense. Am I going to turn back to Wicca because it was the only other religion I practised. No. In my mind the mythology behind paganism is just as much bullshit as everything else. But the spiritual aspects are good. I plan on building a house in about 4 years I hope. On the property I plan on building a Zen Garden. I want to build it reminiscent of ancient groves or "high places" and fill it with these ancient symbols as focal points for meditation. Through meditation I plan on practising my spirituality. I don't need a God to help me with that. I don't believe I will ever be able to be labeled as any particular faith again tho. Maybe I should just make up my own and get in on the money racket. LOL! I'm just kidding! I couldn't do that to anyone knowing now how wrong it is. And how bad it hurts people. I would also like to see this forum pick up activity. I may start my own thread on Interesting religious symbology from all over time and religion. This would serve to help me with my interests as well. Dark Bishop
  8. I agree with Redneck Professor on this one. Give it a little time. Get to know your own thoughts and feelings before you start dating. I would start off slow. Maybe go do something (out of town away from prying eyes). Go somewhere you know no one would see you. Buy a couple of drinks you might like. Go home and sin a little. I know that sounds foreign at this point. It is for me to as well because I once was a preacher. And have also just deconverted recently after a long sabbatical trying to answer the questions I had. Im supposed to tell people not to sin lol. Listen to some music your church would have forbidden. See how you like it. You might even want to look at some X rated stuff on the net. I mean seriously from the sound of it you have been depriving yourself. So I suggest experimenting on your own before you take a leap and start dating someone who has been "of the world" their whole lives. Who knows maybe you can find another ExChristian you can relate too. That understands what your going through. ( thats not a pick up line either im a happily married man already?) Your right the fear is the hardest thing to shake. It's a very powerful tool. I hope that I can completely shake it one day. My wife told me she thinks everyone calls on God on there death bed. I hope I do not. She hasn't been supportive of my deconversion, but she also isn't a religious fanatic anymore so she hasn't condemned me either. She loves me even if I don't love God. So that's cool. Their is still that little...... what if I've made a big mistake stuck back there somewhere. I'm reading and studying trying to slowly work that out. Like you said. Knowledge is power. I haven't come out with my beliefs openly yet either except for my immediate family and a few friends. If said in other comments on this site that I probably won't tell my momom. As far as she knows I'm just trying to get things straightened out. And I still believe but I'm not going to church. I still may have to make an appearance from time to time. But I can live with that. It's not as bad as your situation. I do suggest you find a few friends. Maybe at work or something of that nature. Your right. When you leave your church you will lose the core of your social network. But you might also start hanging out with that half of the family you thought was going to hell before. I have a very close relationship with my twin uncles. One is agnostic the other is pagan. My uncle made the comment he likes the new me better than the Christian me lol. But even back then he would still hang out with me and stuff. We could always find common ground even if it wasn't religion. I wish the best of luck to you. The guys on this site are amazing. They have really helped me in this journey and I know they can help you as well. Just being able to talk to others that understand goes a long way in this process. Dark Bishop
  9. Interesting, thank you logical! I will definitely check it out when I get a chance. ?
  10. Yeah if they realise that they are committing an unforgivable sin according to there own beliefs they may start coming clean. ?
  11. You don't owe anyone any explanations for your new beliefs. Your a free being now to explore your beliefs or non beliefs as you see fit. That's the important part. Dark Bishop
  12. Yeah now that's messed up. They are going against their own teachings in order to keep a job. I thought "money was the root of all evil?". Not only that it is a deception. If you are going to live as Christ supposedly lived you can't knowingly deceive someone. I did a study a long time ago on the relationship of the unforgivable sin in the old testament of taking the Lords name in vain. And the unforgivable sin in the new testament. Blasphe,you of the holy ghost. It never did gain much ground as far as being taught in the church. But I think that's because they already had preformed conclusions on the subject. In the old testament, in the ten commandments it says: KJV Thou shalt not take the name of the LORD thy God in vain; for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain. now keep in mind I don't know Latin, Greek, or Hebrew, so all I had to use was a strong concordance with a Hebrew and Greek dictionary. This is what I came up with. There were two key words you had to look at. The words take and vain. Take- Original: נסה נשׂא Transliteration: nâśâ' nâsâh Phonetic: naw-saw' BDB Definition: to lift, bear up, carry, take (Qal) to lift, lift up to bear, carry, support, sustain, endure to take, take away, carry off, forgive (Niphal) to be lifted up, be exalted to lift oneself up, rise up to be borne, be carried to be taken away, be carried off, be swept away Vain- H7723 Original: שׁו שׁוא o Transliteration: shâv' shav Phonetic: shawv BDB Definition: emptiness, vanity, falsehood emptiness, nothingness, vanity emptiness of speech, lying worthlessness (of conduct) Origin: from the same as H7722 in the sense of desolating TWOT entry: 2338a Part(s) of speech: Noun Masculine Strong's Definition: shâv' shav shawv, shav From the same as H7722 in the sense of desolating ; evil (as destructive), literally (ruin) or morally (especially guile); figuratively idolatry (as false, subjectively), uselessness (as deceptive, objectively; also adverbially in vain): - false (-ly), lie, lying, vain, vanity. So now let's reword this a bit. KJV Thou shalt not (lift, bear up, carry,) the name of the LORD thy God in (emptiness, vanity, falsehood) for the LORD will not hold him guiltless that taketh his name in vain. So you see its not saying God damn or something like that. It's actually carrying or bearing his name in falsehood, vanity, or in other words evil. My best example is of a cult leader molesting children because god supposedly told him to?? So that made since to me why that would be unforgivable. Fast forward to Jesus. And once again there is another unforgivable sin. Mark 3:29 KJV But he that shall blaspheme against the Holy Ghost hath never forgiveness, but is in danger of eternal damnation: Since the Holy Ghost is supposed to lead us after we accept Christ then I felt that the only way to truly Blaspheme the Holy ghost was basically to take the Lords name in vain. I said all that to say this. Even in their own bible. If my study is correct. Then what they are doing is causing them to sin an unforgivable sin. I know the SDA don't believe in a hell like my churches did. But never the less. I'm sure they don't want eternal separation from God either. Because knowingly deceiving your congregation from the pulpit is doing just that. I apologise about the bible study. But this may be something to give those pastors if you talk to them again. Dark Bishop
  13. I would of just told him to get up to. Lol his legs are obviously working. One thing I see on this is that after his miracle at the church he is still having a hard time walking. In all the instances in the bible. If God healed some one he healed them completely.
  14. I like the way you approached that with your friend. I don't think I'm going to actively proselytize deconversion tho. I would like to help people who are questioning things get out of it. And maybe just get people thinking if they approach me about it. I spent a lot of time and effort trying to convert people as a Christian and I just don't want to do that. I'm happy if they are happy. But if they try to push me I will push back. I'm done with being told what to believe. I have a question for ya tho. Do you think that the church leaders are intentionally deceiving people. Or that they are so brainwashed themselves that they are just as deceived as the ones they are deceiving? DB
  15. Welcome to exC!!! Glad to have you in the community. Looks like your gonna have to change your name to blinders lol. I'm curious as well. What happened that pushed you away in the first place? DB
  16. I think pretty much any argument you make, if they are entrenched like you said, would be brushed off in some way. If they couldn't explain it away with the bible then they are probably going to doubt the validity of the discoveries and researches that were done. I can remember a few times when I fell back on the old. "Well they just haven't found the truth yet", spill. Thinking that one day they will come across an ancient buried vault or something with all that they need to prove the bible was telling the truth. But it seems the ore they do find. The more it disproves the bible. Most bible thumping believers will go as far as to accuse scientists of out right lying to lead people away from Jesus. I've even preached against the dead see scrolls for no other reason than that if they didn't make it into God's word. (The KJV bible) then they were all lies because Jesus said his word would be published among all nations and the bible is what was published. And reassuring everyone that what they held in their hands was the infallible word of God. (Yes I was just as brain washed and entrenched as the rest) It took a long time for me to get here. It's the same way between denominations. I had a debate one time with a Mormon friend of mine. He wanted to show me and two other preacher friends of mine the truth behind the LDS beliefs and vise versa, we wanted to lead him out of them. Well to say the least he felt like he had been attacked and I felt like it had been a big waste of time. He was a good man tho. Unfortunately he passed away last year. He was actually a couple of years younger than me. Dark Bishop
  17. I think I read that you made the mistake of gathering a ton of info and just dumped it on them all at once right? I've been trying to think of ways to take the gentle approach you were talking about. I know eventually someone I don't want to know is going to find out. I guess there is really no "good" way to approach the subject to a believer. But I would also like to figure out a way to approach the subject gently to get them to thinking when they do approach me. I haven't really come up with much yet ? DB
  18. I like the relation to diving. I was open water certified myself last year. Looking forward to diving again this year. ? DB
  19. The charismatic churches really hook you. All the churches I went to were that way. It's like getting a spiritual high every Sunday. It's addictive. That really is Ironic but at least you are finding what you believe in and not what you were told to believe in. I saw one of my FB friends who is in the assembly post a pic of his granddaughter today. She is about 1 probably and she was looking up at the camera so sweet. I kinda shook my head and thought to myself. "You are going to be thoroughly brain washed girl. I hope you can open your eyes one day". ? Dark Bishop
  20. Looked like he just woke up from a nap to me. Hell looks like he's sweating laying there under that blanket.
  21. I can relate to SO much of what you just said. If there is anything that has been perceived as a miracle it was probably going to happen anyway. Like Pat on the 700 club holding hands with his head bowed and says. "There is a woman that found out that she had cervical cancer last year. God wants you to know you are healed." " Someone has lost their wife and is thinking about suicide. God wants you to know he loves you and is with you during this time." I mean seriously out of the millions of people watching how many might fit that criteria? Then they praise God their cancer didn't come back after they scraped her cervix and someone gets a feeling of reassurance during a time of grief. Then pat gets new donations to the 700 club. YAY! God is great. I also had friends and family who were good people but I knew they would go to hell if they didn't accept Jesus. Basically that's just a ploy so you will try your damndest to convert them. Because you've been brain washed to believe someone you love so much will be tortured for eternity if you don't witness to them. The best thing I can tell you to do to break your fears is to research. The more you know about the truth the easier it will be to reprogram your brain. Your loved ones are good people. Their isn't a hell for them to go to. And you are not a bad person for questioning. He says he will try us in the bible. He is a hypocrite if he expects us not to try him. From the sounds of it you have been trying him with your prayers and pleas for his devine intervention with no answer, that's because he is not there. I hope this helps, I know how you feel. Many of us here went through the same things. Don't think your alone in this. We will help anyway we can. Dark Bishop
  22. Thanks Back Again, I'm just glad I realised all of this now and not later. I still have many years I hope to live out from under the oppression that is Christianity. I really meant it when I said I realised my house I was supposed to be building was actually a prison. I think back on all the decisions I made, all the things I denied myself, and all the time I spent doing "Gods" work when I could have been doing something I would have enjoyed more if I had known what I know now. But I guess at the time it was what I wanted to do. So I guess that's OK. Dark Bishop
  23. Andrew, Thank you for the kind words. I'm doing pretty good so far. The more I learn about the actual truth of the bible the more I'm confident in my decision to deconvert. I'm glad to hear you found your niche in another belief. I know most here have become athiest but I, like you, still believe there is something out there. I don't know what it is but I hope I'm able to retain the hope for something after this. I know it won't be a mansion. Which honestly I never wanted a mansion lol. Your right God was a bit looney in the OT. But the concept of "hell" in the new testament was a pretty twisted idea to dream up as well. ? so either way I'm glad I'm out of his "good graces" He can take his hell and shove it lol. ? I used to be so afraid to question God thinking it was something wrong with me. It's really a whole new world when your able to look in on religion from the outside. Best regards, Dark Bishop
  24. Welcome syrus! Glad to have you. Hope to see more from you ?. DB
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