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About Lydie

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    UK, North London
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  • More About Me
    Still figuring it all out.

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
  1. I’m just realising this and I don’t know if it can be undone. Reading the bible and sermons and thinking ‘well, that’s stupid’ (cursing fig trees etc.) but within a split second quashing that thought. I’m wrong I’m sinful I’m not spiritual enough to understand properly Why isn’t the Holy Spirit telling me what to do Also when someone does me wrong turning the other cheek and just forgiving instead of feeling angry with just cause and distancing myself from people who don’t have my best interests at heart. I’ve squashed those instincts and wonder if I can resurrect them (pun intended).
  2. Genocide ‘miracle’ story

    It was called ‘left to tell’. I completely agree with the fact people are known to exaggerate the miraculous. Also that many with ‘visions’ were killed. She is an outlier and there are many people with the same story, only it ended when the soldiers DID find the crawl space. The thing that remains is that IF (and it’s a big if) these people are telling the truth, there are things we can’t explain and which are very strange.
  3. My apologies

    Hang in there.
  4. Genocide ‘miracle’ story

    All I meant is that there were indeed strings of coincidences and that saved her. So for a land mine or gun not to go off, yes that’s covered by your explanation. But for someone to walk safely through a hostile crowd, unimpeded, then for another group to act as if they couldn’t see her, then for someone to show mercy because they resembled a loved one, then for a person of influence helping because your parents once helped them. Visualising a person who will help you then they appear, looking as you drew them etc. = a happy string of coincidences that make you wonder if there is more.
  5. Thanks for that thoughtful answer Storm. I will just ‘be’ there.
  6. I’ve just read a book someone wrote about surviving a genocide. Reading it through ex-Christian eyes I can see it from a rational position, but it makes me sad. This survivor will hold onto the God narrative as to do otherwise would mean she loses those people forever. Here are some thoughts I had while reading it. * so all those other people were not special or chosen, but you were. * Those voices of God with good ideas (hide in the floor vent) are YOUR BRAIN coming up with solutions. * Sometimes ‘God telling you things’ is your subconscious figuring it out. E.g. you ‘knew’ not to trust someone because subconsciously you recognised the face as your friend’s dads cousin you saw once in primary school, at their house telling a dirty joke, and you took a dislike to him. * Those visions are hallucinations caused by extreme stress. The words of comfort are words you need. The ideas are your own. * monks from other religions have similar experiences through meditation and the experiences can be recreated by stimulating certain regions of the brain.’ * This God, even if he’s real is watching those babies get killed and not intervening. I don’t want to worship it. If it wants me to worship it it needs to give me a proper explanation, not just ‘mysterious ways’. coincidences there were parts I found hard to reconcile and which make me think there is ‘more’, even not necessarily the Judeo Christian view. - she walked through a group who just let her pass when others were being shot. - Someone didn’t kill her because she looked like his sister so he helped her escape. - lots of ‘visualisations’ which came true.
  7. I have an old friend who knows I no longer go to church or believe, but we have never gone into detail- mutual unspoken agreement. I think she thinks I am ‘angry at God’. She has suffered a loss. I don’t know how to support her and I think she hates even to see me as I represent the idea that death is the end, not a magical castle in the sky. How do I support her. I’ve said sorry for your loss, brought some food but I don’t know how to be when I can’t say the usual ‘in a better place’ guff.
  8. How Islam Infects

    Sorry- I don’t get it. Could someone spell it out?
  9. Thanks for the kind words. I am still in a dark place. It’s about four years down the line and I’m unfortunately still with him for a number of reasons - financial, cultural and not wanting to uproot my daughter (his step daughter). His family have also decided to blame and shun me. They said similar to the pastor and also that I disrespected them by saying they were aware he had had gambling problems when he was young but did nothing except burry their heads in the sand and they kept it a secret from me - I would not have married him knowing of the addiction issues. The one positive of his ‘double life’ is that he was only pretending to be as religious as me, so my de conversation was not in a house with a churchy spouse... I’m getting secular counselling for depression and low self esteem.
  10. I’ll tell you the counselling I was given. We were saving up to have a child and waiting until my husband had finished some professional qualifications. It it turns out that my husband had gambled away our savings as well as cheating and having a double life. I went to the pastor in a state of collapse. The advice I was given is that I should have been a better wife and prayed more. That I should forgive him and that we should have had that baby right away because ‘see what that waiting has caused’.
  11. On Topic Imagery

    TThis is a bit similar to ‘Things atheists post on Facebook ‘ on the Rants and Replies board. There’s some interesting stuff on there.
  12. I watched a documentary about Jim Jones. At the end, a good many did not want to drink the kool aid and were shot. With the people beheaded by ISIS, some say ‘why don’t they struggle and at least try to fight back or run away!’. They have many ‘mock’ executions and are punished for acting out so are led to believe ‘this is probably a mock’ and only realise it’s real when they are cut. The same happened in Jonestown. They would have dummy runs of the kool aid taking. People who refused were then punished, denied meals etc. At the beginning a few thought it was just another dummy run. When they saw people dying some tried to run. They were shot and others were injected. Also, they killed the children first, so many parents lost the will to go on.
  13. Things Fundies Say On Facebook

    Dafuk ?!?
  14. Do they not see how stupid this sounds?

    I like the bumper sticker that says ‘Jesus loves you but I’m his favourite ‘.
  15. I really need your help!

    I would recommend a book called ‘the willpower instinct ‘. It explains some of the psychology of why we do what we don’t want to do and vice versa. It also provides some strategies for change. Listen to it on Audible.