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Everything posted by Christy

  1. Evolution does nothing to help my case. My parents, and my old pastors, believe in evolution. They do not understand it all but they can not deny it is true. They claim that the Bible provides room for it. They say that god forming Adam from dirt is just a short quick way of saying that people evolved. God is the one that enacted the Big Bang, humans evolved from what formed the earth and God breathing into Adams nostrils was the point God saw the evolution from ape to human as "complete" to his liking and gave him his soul but the actual creature of Adam was already living. So... So once I come out to my parents as a nonbeliever, science doesn't really help me.. I will have to rely only on psychology of religion and discrepancies of text I guess.
  2. If there was ever a person who would never give up their religion, it is my mother. She believes it with every inch of her. She said while my grandmother was dying she laid on her bed, lifted her hands and said "glory,glory". That sealed the deal for my mom. She'll never turn her back on Christianity.
  3. That sounds harsh but my mother is the sweetest most giving person I know. She's only become radical the past few years. As her and my step fathers health has decreased their faith has increased. She talks to me like I'm just another believer. It would depress her if she thought I was on the path to hell. I feel like I'd rather just refrain from breaking her heart and let her live thinking like I'm a Christian.
  4. Yeah I'm feeling like I might just keep this secret until she dies.
  5. Just sat on the phone with my mother for an hour listening to how some shit in the sky was going to happen over Israel tomorrow and the sun will go black for 3 hours and how hurricane Maria (aka Mary) and hurricane Jose (aka Joseph) were going to "dance"? (IDFK) And something about ten stars and planets in a constellation. AND I've heard all these signs are being fulfilled and on and on and I just want to scream "Jesus Christ"(and not in the good way). Now she's sent me a video explaining all of it. I just went along with it and spit out whatever verses I could think of to coincide with what she talked about as if I still believe it all. If you are still in the closet as a non-believer, what do you do when your loved ones start talking about all of this? I'm so ready for these dates to pass so I can at least have a break before the next round of end time coincidences start popping up. It's stressing me out!
  6. @Mothernature how long has your husband been like this? I'm guessing at one point he wasn't? What triggered him to jump over the edge into obsession? I'm so sorry. Do you have and non-believing family members or at least any unobsessed ones who could come to your aid should things get bad? The thing about Christianity is that when obsessed believers do things in the name of religion they loose sight of what is right and wrong in reality. Please be careful. My heart is with you.
  7. Anyone else watch Rick and Morty?
  8. @J_Julie Check out this website: http://leading-learners.org/student-news/teen-help-resources-and-hotlines/ there are many phone numbers on that site with professionals who can help you in your situation. Please don't kill yourself. Life is hard sometimes and as a teenager it can feel like you are drowning and there is no way out. But I promise that there is. There is always a way out of your darkest situations and feelings. Please click that link and call any one of those hotlines. They are all 24/7 and can provide you with immediate help and counseling.
  9. It's crazy how all of us feel like we have to hide and keep quite about who we are to please/protect our families and mostly our parents. I understand the feeling of wanting to blurt it out under stress. When I'm under stress from a long day or just life in general, then my mom wants start talking about Jesus/God/End time prophecy/Are you ready/Read your Bible/Are you teaching the kids/Going to church?/ etc...etc.. I want to say "look! I don't believe in all of that crap anymore! Stop stressing over it! It's stressing me out and I've got more important things to deal with!!" But I keep those thought to myself and just go along with whatever she's saying and try to find a reason to get off the phone.
  10. Honey go find yourself in the world!! Tomorrow will always be there. College will always be there!! Do like @Burnedout said and get a job on a Cruz ship omg that would be so fun! I work at an assisted living home and there is one lady there who worked as a flight attendent and she said it was the best and most fun thing she ever did. She's got amazing stories of seeing the world and all the adventures that come with it. So my advice: travel and discover the world and you'll find yourself along the way. You are young!! Enjoy it! There is plenty of time to worry about life when you get older.
  11. Thank you, I will do that. Should I just google or do you have a recommended source?
  12. Dear Lovely, First let me say that I can not imagine what you have gone through. It pains me to know that you and others have suffered at the hands of Christianity. Add that to another reason I can't allow myself to be apart of it any longer. I never went through the things you faced but my heart is with you. In many of your posts/responses it seems as though you are insecure/ashamed about opening up about the trauma you experienced through your time as a Christian. DO NOT EVER FEEL ASHAMED! This is not your fault. You were only a child and now, as an adult, you have chosen to break the cycle! It is so amazing that you found the strength and courage to walk away from years of abuse. I am new here and still learning the ins and outs of this online community but it seems to me that everyone here has been fucked by Christianity from one end of the spectrum to the other. This seems like a welcoming place to be yourself and tell your story no matter how screwed up it might be. No it is not a substitute for a psychologist but it is a place for friends who can relate to your struggles. As for your parents, of course you love them. Even if they were the ones inflicting the abuse. They will always be your parents and you will always love them. This religion has caused so much pain and suffering to those that follow it. It makes individuals do cruel things to others in it's name. That is not your fault, I don't care if you did asked for the "games". Abuse fucks with you so much mentally that it's hard to see what is right and what is wrong when you are in the thick of it. But you have chosen not to carry on with what your parents did to you (and possibly what they had done to them?) You have broken the cycle so hold your head high and take a deep breath. You have and you will continue to survive and your life will improve. Give yourself a break and a pat on the back. I don't even know you and I'm proud of you. Sure, it will take a long time for you to sort through all those awful years but you can do it! Take one step and one day at a time. As for your fear that it all might be true and that the world might end,... to that I have to say LET IT!! I've thought of that and I still do sometimes but my own experience combined with stories like yours really piss me off and if the world ends I'll stand in front of God and question him and his love. How could he allow a religion that's been so evil in his name (if he is so loving and good) carry on and prosper? You were only a child. How many other children out there are facing what you faced or worse??? I wish you the best darling.
  13. Part of me wants to tell her now, before we move so that if she can't handle it then I can change my plans and stay at a distance.
  14. I know it'll kill my mom. She's the queen of end of times... this sucks.
  15. @LovelyChantel @disillusioned I feel like the only result will be pain unless I could only deconvert them which I don't see possible... my mother is the type that thinks God speaks directly to her and gives her dreams/visions...she doesn't read anything but the Bible or books about the Bible. She knows that I have doubts. I did tell her about that. I didn't go into detail and we only talked through text message because we're both busy, truth be told I was just crying but knew I couldn't handle listening to her. I told her I was going through something and I had a lot of questions that didn't add up. This was only a few weeks ago. If it weren't for the fact that I know she'll try to indoctrinate my children when we move back to my hometown next year ( currently living 10 hrs away) then I might not even tell them.
  16. @TruthSeeker thank you very much. Yes, to be done with the guilt is liberating. We are good people, Christianity made me feel like I wasn't. I would like to keep it from my parents but I know that won't be possible. We will soon be moving back to my hometown and I know we will be assumed to go along with the parade. I can't fake it anymore. I've gone too far and my eyes are opened too wide. We are currently 10 hours from them. We move back next year...
  17. Insurance companies are required to cover several hours per year for mental health. Check into it. They don't advertise it of course but it's available. If you don't have insurance... idk what is going to happen with Obamacare however, the enrollment period is from November 1st to December 15th. The funding for ACA advertising was cut so save those dates. You likely won't see it on tv or anything... maybe online or on twitter, that's about it.
  18. It will be a long time before I tell my parents. I am not ready for that. So far, my husband and this online community are the only ones who know and that has spoiled me. I have yet to meet the resistance a non-believer faces. Don't get me wrong, I know what they face as I have know other non-believers. However, I have never been in their shoes. I want to start thinking about how to tell them and what to say to them now so I will be prepared when the situation comes. SO!.., how did you tell your parents? Any regrets on how you went about it? Suggestions on how long I should wait? If you've already posted how you told your parents else where on this site, just link the post. Thanks!
  19. @ChelseaGuy well if we all die, we won't die alone. My advice is, try to accept the fact that we will all die eventually, be it from natural causes or not. I feel like anytime I am afraid of something I can not change, if I can find a way to accept it and just tell my brain "this is just how it is" I am able to handle it a lot easier. If that doesn't work for you then maybe you should consider donating your time and/or money to an organization(s) that would combat the evils that you see destroying life on earth. Being proactive against the evils may help you rest easier. You would feel as though you were making a difference and helping to stop the end of the world. Also, 70 is still pretty young! How old are you? I promise there is plenty of life after 70!!! I am only 28 but I have friends who are 70+ and I work in an assisted living community taking care of people who are over a hundred and still have their mind and get up and do stuff. They buy newly released books, debate politics, sing karaoke, go to baseball games, go out to dinner with friends etc etc. They still live life at that age. It is a beautiful thing. Don't live your life in fear of dying. Just live your life and if one day you die... well you won't have to be sitting here scared of dying anymore.
  20. The world has gone through so many different periods and given rise to so many different life forms. Then these life forms almost completely die off, all except a small few. From that small life evolves into a new plethora of creatures until the next time. Life always perseveres. If any creature in the history of all creatures on this planet can find a way to skip being wiped off the face of the earth, I'd bet us humans would be it. Food for thought: say we fix the planet, don't blow ourselves up or unleash an incurable disease upon ourselves, I wonder how different we might evolve to look like in the next billions of years. I wonder about skin color.. it's an evolutionary trait that directly correlates with the amount of UV rays our ancestors lived with. But now humans live and move to all places of the earth and we spend a considerable amount of time in doors, plus factor in interracial relationships. I wonder about stature/body type... we are no longer hunters and gatherers. Obesity is definitely a problem. Will we evolve to handle this better? Will technology take away the need to be active at all? (ever seen Disney's Wall-E?) Will we get taller? Shorter? I wonder about our food supply... we have changed our foods so much, will our bodies evolve to the point that we can only handle processed foods? Do you ever think we will leave this planet?
  21. You are right. Those three things are how you are controlled in this religion. I believe your observation of a Pentecostal service is spot on!
  22. My son loves The Flash. We watch the show and follow the comics. Him and my oldest daughter pretend to be Barry and Godspeed and race through the yard and play fight. My parents didn't have a problem with Pokémon but they wouldn't let me read Harry Potter and later didn't want me to see the movies.
  23. I used to believe that I needed to anoint the doorways and windows of my home to keep the devil and his demons out... looking back I'm not sure why, if he were real, he would need to use the door. I mean he could just come through the walls or floor right? I used to look up and talk to God. Not sure why peering into space means I'm looking toward Heaven. God would be in a different realm so to speak so looking any direction would not matter... In response to the music thing, I was always taught if it's not for Him it's against Him((Drama king)) I believed if a demon was cast out in the sanctuary we had to lay our hands on all the children in the nursery/daycare and ask for a "hedge of protection" around them. Apparently demons like to posses little children... not sure why a "loving Heavenly Father" wouldn't automatically think to protect the children first. Probably the most absurd and possibly the funniest now: when I was a little girl, I was very private about using the bathroom. Like I literally could not go in public or if anyone was near by. I had been told that God/Jesus watched me constantly and always knew what I was doing. I would hold it as long as I could because I didn't want them/him/whatever to see me in the bathroom exposed and trying to do my business. So, I would pray over and over before I went that they would just look away for a few minutes until I got done. Id promise not to do anything bad while I was in there. Lol I'd work myself into an absolute frenzy. It was very stressful at the time, I was probably 4-8. By 9/10 I got over it because I realized God wasn't paying attention to me that closely.
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