I'm not really sure how I am going to word myself but here I go. I have grown up in a Christian home, I think my parents love me, but I don't know. When I was little they used to yell at each other a lot and it was horrible. They used to 'smack' us and say it was for the best. But it hurt and I'm so glad that has stopped now. Once my father told me he thought I had an evil spirit inside of me, another time he held me down and started preying over me. I want to kill myself but I am too scared of hell. I want to get far far away from my parents, who have caused everything I fear. But I feel bad because they were trying to do the right thing, but its really hurting me now, and I'm struggling to love them, respect them, and get along with them. Also I went vegan because I want to harm at he least amount of leaving creatures that I can, but this has caused even more tension in the house. I feel trapped in this house. I'm only 16 so its really hard to know what to do. My bf said I might be able to move in with them if it I can't cope anymore, but I just don't know what is the right choice.