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DestinyTurtle last won the day on August 4 2018

DestinyTurtle had the most liked content!

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About DestinyTurtle

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    Strong Minded

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    Science, Art, and the various manifestations of honest creativity in general...
  • More About Me
    I was raised as a Calvinist. Needless to say I moved past it, now.

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    I am not attached to that word.

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  1. I've gained a lot of valuable friendships since deconverting (you guys definitely included!). My childhood best friend was actually a friend of mine since before my deconversion (surprisingly enough, I was nuts back then!) but my friendship with him definitely reached new levels when I was finally able to converse with him as an equal and as an X-Xian. I'm in an excellent relationship with my girlfriend who is someone I could not have imagined ever being with while I was a Xian. In fact, I think I would have been forbidden from having any romantic relationship at all as a Xian! Weird to think!
  2. Don't be afraid to feel. There's no roadmap largely because this is you learning how to be your true self, and by design no one can show you a roadmap for that. You've probably seen how people cling to religion partly because they are afraid of what it would entail if they gave themselves permission to be themselves and think for themselves. It's a difficult responsibility but a rewarding one in the end.
  3. Welcome to X-Xian! Yeah the insincerity that permeates Xianity is a lot to wake up to...
  4. Similar experience here. Much later I realized that that attitude of anger and fear towards my questions were themselves proof that they themselves didn't really believe. Anyways, glad you're here and hope the community here helps! Welcome to X-Xian!
  5. You're welcome! You know it took me many years even after my deconversion to realize my parents were narcissists? I *knew* something was off about them but I didn't have the vocabulary, or I didn't allow myself to have the vocabulary... to describe them. They really effectively conditioned me to rationalize and defend their behavior, even after I learned to disagree with their beliefs. Anyways, once again, glad you're here
  6. It's a pet peeve of mine the selfishness and hypocrisy of people who raise their kids this way - depriving them of ordinary everyday joys and relief - when they themselves never had to endure that level of asceticism as kids, because they conveniently got to choose the "true" faith as an adult after they "got it out of their system". Thank you for sharing your story, @mrspearl! It really spoke to me. I think you have tremendous courage and strength of character to stand up to that! I'm honored to be part of a community with people like you
  7. Really? Wow. I didn't know that. These people really thought that abandonment was a just and holy thing?
  8. Also notice that Paul never actually met Jesus... he simply had a vision of him once during a particularly intense nervous breakdown, and yet he has the gall to consider himself equal to the Apostles. This is actually a glaring hole in the bible canon and you might notice a lot of theologians make a special point of insistently calling Paul, "The Apostle Paul" over and over... (whereas sometimes they'll call Peter or John simply by their first names and assume you know they're apostles by context) because they know Paul's apostleship is questionable and they have to push this belief through the brute force of the power of suggestion. On close inspection he appears to be just some guy who claims he met a famous person he never met and hijacked an emergent religious movement with his own personal beliefs, and later organizations found his writings useful for promoting things like authoritarianism and misogyny.
  9. It's not supposed to make sense, it's supposed to make you teary-eyed because of some kind of "sacrifice" it represented. Seems to me Jesus was just a kind guy who spoke his mind, and people got mad and killed him. Now many people quote him, backed with two thousand years of theologizing to rationalize why it's actually a good thing to punish and kill innocent people who speak their minds.
  10. Religion made me believe that living in constant, overwhelming fear was a natural and good way to be.
  11. Welcome, @Tripqing! It's rough coming out to your family as X-Xian! Glad you're here!
  12. Damn. Thank you for sharing that story with us. It's completely out of line for them to interrogate you like that - church leader or not.
  13. Welcome to X-Xian! Seems you're starting to ask yourself a lot of questions about the bible... that's a big no-no for a Xian! :P I hope we can help! I'm glad you're here!
  14. Nice. It often occurred to me that Xians are either woefully ignorant of the genocide-promoting passages in the bible or they are despondent fundamentalists who would defend anything insane or cruel just for the sake of it. This pamphlet is straight to the point. I like it!
  15. Welcome to X-Xian, @mrspearl! I hope this website helps! Although my circumstances are different than yours I certainly struggled with recovering from abuse from a cultish family. It's super courageous to distance yourself from all the abuse despite the tidal wave of societal judgement!