justaskingquestions

Hi folks, I have a really, really close friend that means the world to me. I also live with them (roommate). I'm proud to say that we have a healthy relationship, except that I have been unable to be truthful about me becoming an atheist. This is mostly because religion was a huge part of our friendship for about 2+ years (my friend is still religious). My friend has told me to my face that they value me as a close Christian friend, as almost a "solace" from our other friends who don't share those beliefs and values. My fear is not that my friend will ostracize me, rather that this foundational part of our relationship will be pulled out from underneath them and they won't know how to view me. Any tips that you found were helpful? What's the best way to approach this? Thank you all

Let me be clear: this is a forum to talk about emotions. This is not a forum to argue logic. I want to express how emotionally unwell I have been since becoming Atheist. Don't get me wrong, I feel a true sense of relief in no longer following God. But the ways that it has affected me mentally and emotionally have been tremendously bad. My entire worldview has been shifted so I have to reassess EVERY aspect of my life. I've been challenged to find what the basis of my moral code is, now that it's no longer based on the Bible. The world has becoming so depressing, and to be honest I've really lost my sense of hope. The one thing the church gave me that the rest of the world cannot is hope. I feel such a sense of dread and unease now that my purpose for existing - that a divine creator put me here - is gone and I'm left to justify my experience for myself. My OCD symptoms have worsened and I haven't been this depressed since several years ago. I don't know what to do now that my entire understanding of life and purpose has been ripped away. Can anyone provide relief or understanding? Any quotes or books that have been helpful? If you feel comfortable, I'd really appreciate it, I'm really lost and could benefit from the help.

I was posing this to mean that it is untenable. Also I'm not sure if you're referring to the things I listed as funky, or if you generally are just referring to things we don't understand.

I've always struggled with this: if the word of God is our natural design, and anything else is simply a manipulative distraction put in the place by Satan, then why does following the Gospel feel so unnatural? Here are just a few examples out of many: If women are supposed to be subservient and inferior, why are the sexes equally intelligent and capable? If being gay is so wrong, why are people born gay, and why do studies show time and time again that being gay is natural and healthy? If pre-marital sex, masturbation, AND "impure thoughts" are wrong, then why is nearly impossible for anyone to not jack off or have sex before marriage *unless* they are asexual? If feeling malcontented with your life is wrong, then why do most people feel the need to always better their situations and improve themselves? If we're meant to commit acts of violence against those in our community who commit sins, then why do most humans turn physically ill simply at the sight of blood or gore? How can we be expected to follow through on stoning each other? All of these guidelines are supposed to give us the best life possible, right? The life God mean us to live, right? Then why do they shouldn't feel so damn uncomfortable? (The answer is obvious, but it's one that more Christians should consider.)

You and I define morality in the same way.

I hope that she finds peace and comfort in truth and doesn't feel guilty for something that isn't her fault. I know how these things affect our minds and hearts. I send all my love to her and you

For me too

Exactly! I always ask my Christian parents if being gay is a choice, could they chose to be gay? That leaves them baffled lmao

Though I don't think fetishes are comparable to orientation, I appreciate that you drew from your own experiences and use them to empathize with gay people!

I am so sorry to hear about what happened to your wife. I hope she's healing and moving forward with positivity. I also hope that you are okay after being sexually harassed in that way; I don't think enough is done about sexual harassment in the church, people get away with saying the grossest stuff and no one holds them accountable. My heart goes out to you both.

This is 100% my experience too. Christianity is so backwards in its treatment of women, it's pathetic.

What has been the most liberating part of leaving Christianity? Most difficult?

That's true. I just remember as a Christian being really annoyed with my atheist friends who celebrated Christmas haha

Good point!

Thank you