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TruthSeeker0

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TruthSeeker0 last won the day on March 13

TruthSeeker0 had the most liked content!

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About TruthSeeker0

  • Rank
    Skeptic

Profile Information

  • Gender
    Female
  • Interests
    There are a lot of them. Living in the moment is the main one.
  • More About Me
    I'm an ex-fundie going on two years, navigating this thing called life.
    My Ex-timony: https://www.ex-christian.net/topic/76321-truth-set-me-free/

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    Nope

Recent Profile Visitors

566 profile views
  1. For you to come here and claim that exchristians here just really had "no idea what it means to have faith" and to not have enough "knowledge" (aka "enlightenment or something in your words, because the Bible can be interpreted in as many ways as there are people on this Earth) is incredulous. It's also so condescending and patronizing - a God we haven't bothered to get to know? Seriously? Have you even read through the extimony section? Read Richard Dawkins. Read some Bart Ehrman. Read some Elaine Pagels. Read some Dan Barker. With an open mind. Educate yourself on what scholars say about the Bible (no not your church pastor who claims to have the truth) before coming here and stating that we just believe " what we've been told by other non believers." I'll leave you with a short quote I've used many times on this site already. "I do understand what love is, and that is one of the reasons I can never again be a Christian. Love is not self denial. Love is not blood and suffering. Love is not murdering your son to appease your own vanity. Love is not hatred or wrath, consigning billions of people to eternal torture because they have offended your ego or disobeyed your rules. Love is not obedience, conformity, or submission. It is a counterfeit love that is contingent upon authority, punishment, or reward. True love is respect and admiration, compassion and kindness, freely given by a healthy, unafraid human being." -Dan Barker
  2. You can write a letter and email it. It means you won't need to deal with drama and reactions in person and you have control over the situation.
  3. I'd also be interested in knowing what kind of an education they had.
  4. Bravo, that's a big step! I came out as agnostic (was unwilling to use atheist due to all the negative stereotypes attached) over a year ago and it complicated family relationships. Things have calmed down somewhat since then but I'm having to deal with toxic behavior within the family partially due to religion, which totally encourages the us vs them mentally and isolating people emotionally. I just sent my family a letter expressing how the behavior has made me feel. The important thing is that you try to retain open and honest communication. Sometimes there's only so much of relationships you can salvage when religion influences behavior.
  5. https://www.thenation.com/article/patriarchy-sexism-philosophy-reproductive-rights/
  6. Gossip is a way of "othering" you. If you're concerned about gossip about yourself just keep that in mind. It only serves the purpose of them separating themselves from you and somehow feeling superior or more correct in their beliefs etc. It's a reinforcement practice for that. After all if they started getting too familiar with the black sheep they could stand to be labeled as one themselves. This is doubly true of fundamentalists. Practice the IDGAF mindset and if necessary cut ties. I did that with some chronic gossipers in my own family. Yes they might be hurt etc, but guess what, IDGAF. Healthy boundaries are necessary.
  7. Congratulations on leaving the mindfuck behind! Your story is very similar to mine. There's a high price to pay for leaving. All the consequences, with family and friends, the isolation, lingering fear, anxiety, they take quite awhile to deal with. I left over two years ago and it's a slow road to recovery but it gets better with time. My advice is start building a support network of people that can be there for you, go to therapy/counseling if necessary, and yes hang out here or in the chat room with like minded people. You've probably already read Marlene winell's excellent book, that helped me a lot. Mindfulness and self compassion have helped me when things get really tough. I wish you all the best and welcome!
  8. There are in all likelihood like minded people to be found in Mexico, not only in Canada. Search for secular organizations or clubs you could join. In Canada at least there are several to be found particularly in metropolitan areas.
  9. I understand. One of the hardest things for me was establishing clear boundaries that I knew would hurt people. But I had to do it. Boundary violations in my ex church are sone of the main ways of controlling people and are taught as church teaching ie "if you see your brother erring go rebuke them". As a result those in my family in the church constantly try to violate personal boundaries and wishes because they think it's acceptable.
  10. Why do you need to discuss it? Is it necessary for them to know?
  11. What you're doing here is over idealizing this "girl of your dreams." I don't think I'm the only person that thinks so either. You have what I would call a fixation with her. Due to this, you're ruling out other viable options and other people. I used to be this idealistic when I was younger. But relationships in reality are complex as are people. I'd recommend seeing a secular therapist. There's no shame in doing so.
  12. I just read through this thread. Here's what I have to say. It appears you want to be the Knight in shining armor and save this lady. My take: youre creating more pain for yourself by spending time together in an impossible situation. I speak as a woman who was a fundie deeply infected with the god virus. There is nothing you can do at this point. She is brainwashed and indoctrinated. When they tell her you're Satan, trust me she believes it. Do you think you stand a chance in that kind of scenario? No. The best thing for you would be to walk. There are some people you just can't save unless they are willing to save themselves first. The good news is that whether you want to give it a try or not at this point in time, there are plenty of matches out there that stand a better chance when religion doesn't stand in the way. Don't fall for the "there's only one person for me" romantic fairytale crap, ok? If you find someone with similar values, hobbies and interests and you get along well, in the long run your relationship will survive the initial intoxication, which eventually hits and must square with reality if it's going to survive.
  13. I really agree with this. When I joined I thought @florduh was a little harsh in his approach to dealing with xtians in some ways. But now, no I wouldn't have it any other way.
  14. You are doing the best you can. That is what I tell myself, over and over and over.
  15. @ag_NO_stic Sorry to hear this, love and ((hugs)). It hurts so much to be labeled and misunderstood that way, it's the one thing that keeps getting to me with family. I do not care about their beliefs but I care that they can't even try to see things from a different perspective. I don't expect this to change. Also, I've been thinking I may have similar prospects for myself, dating an atheist whose parents are fundamentalists and may very well put some blame on me for being a bad influence on him (they're not aware of his beliefs). One thing that I have decided is, if the conversation comes up, I'll tell them they will have to decide which is more important, their views on religion or having a healthy relationship with us.
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