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Everything posted by Dexter

  1. This resonates with me strongly. My youngest sister and I were the smartest (in terms of raw intelligence) of our siblings and so she and I both took those are marks of our identities. We never competed directly as we were six years apart so she was always ahead of me but we did compete by trying to gain as many accomplishments to compare to each other as we could. But she was extremely sharp and dynamic and let no boy get the best of her. Any who tried to assert dominance she could easily reduce to a husk of insecurity and self-doubt. ((Once I witnessed a boy hitting on her, trying to assert
  2. I would say leave it but unless it is a cathartic exercise for you. It's like poking the facebook hornet's nest for me when I see a friend or relative post something incomprehensibly stupid, I'll correct them, not because I think any good will come of it but it makes me feel just a tad better. And I NEVER read the replies. Ok, I sometimes read the replies. But in general, just don't.
  3. I'll just toss this out there, though I do not regard myself as remotely qualified to comment. I'd go with the flow, however that flow most easily goes. As a kid, the most exciting part of Christmas for me was, of course, the presents (and ugh, I'd always get CLOTHES as presents... my parents were monsters ) and seeing the decorations. The kids love the spectacle and the break up of the normal routine. So I'd say decorate in whatever way seems fit. I hope lights aren't pagan implements because those were always my favorite and the different colors they cast onto a room. And when giving gifts
  4. I am not typically an emotional person, though you wouldn't know it to see me of late. But while I took my faith intellectually, I put all of my motivation and conviction into it as well. Loosing god was genuinely like losing a relative. It's still hard for me to process at times.
  5. A question for those further along in their personal journeys. While the loss of my faith was slow, my actual moment of deconversion was pretty abrupt and emotional. For those who had that sudden loss of faith, did you experience episodes of crying and emotion from time to time afterwards? I find myself in such a state this morning. I am remembering the actual moment and as melodramatic as this may sound, I find it deeply traumatizing.
  6. I can’t claim this reflects anyone else’s experience but I got heavy exposure to the Bible as a child. Not just hearing stories but I was in Bible Bowl. It’s basically quiz bowl only for churches and, well, the bible (link below). I could quote large swaths of it before I was out of high school. I can still recite some genealogies even to this day. https://home.biblebowl.org/
  7. Interesting! Did that music contain instruments? Was the computer not considered an instrument?
  8. I am a writer so I recognize prose and sentence structure. When I write, I choose my words very deliberately. The Bible, regardless of its translation, has a distinct prose, a manner of sentence structure and phrasing that is unmistakable. Even The Message has some stilted, very decidedly “Biblical” phrasing. I have been experimenting with this some more and I am finding that this prose is a trigger for me. That when read, it bypasses a lot of my adult cognitive functions. It’s like my brain was hacked. It’s an unsettling revelation.
  9. I just realized, when I first tried speaking the story aloud to myself I said that god confused their language for the disobedience of gathering in one place and not expanding into the rest of the world. But that’s not what it says. That’s not the reason it gives. That’s why I couldn’t finish the story aloud. “The LORD said, "Behold, they are one people, and they all have the same language. And this is what they began to do, and now nothing which they purpose to do will be impossible for them.” ‭‭Genesis‬ ‭11:6‬ ‭NASB God was threatened by them.
  10. I’ve always considered myself to be fairly aware of my own cognitive patterns and biases but I am really deeply disturbed by a sudden paradigm shift that I did not see coming. Just today during lunch I hear the Tower of Babel story ready from the Bible and it kind of made sense to me. Then I hear someone recount it in plain English and it was utter lunacy! I read it again from the Bible and it sounded plausible again. Then I spoke the story aloud in my own words and I couldn’t even finish it because it made no goddamn sense! It’s like, hearing it aloud and outside the
  11. Wanna go see the Creation Museum for yourself but don’t want to give those lunatics your money? Well, I already did for you. If anyone wants to see it for themselves, hit me up. I have a lifetime membership pass and four lifetime guest passes. I gave them a grand back some time ago for that, now dubious, honor. Sorry, I cannot get you onto the Ark. i have a free passs on account of my parents giving them $5k during its construction but the Ark’s guest policy was loads more strict after lifetime memberships nearly bankrupted the Creation Museum. See the ma
  12. Interestingly, the way I resolved it when I was a true believer was like this: God’s nature is not to torture so any hell of “active” torture is false. Rather, those who rebel against god, he will ALLOW to leave his presence utterly. And since his presence is goodness, peace and love, hell is just a place with the absence of those things. It is “like” fire and it is “like” torture but to keep my god model internally consistent, he took no active part in the affairs of hell.
  13. I am aware of this but I often find that it doesn’t matter. Every time I’ve tried the approach that, “no, your religion actually teaches...” I’ve already lost my audience. Hell, I’ve had to refute a people I called “Brownies.” They are readers of Dan Brown’s fiction, the Davinci Code, and believed it as true. It’s all mythology. So I start where the mythos starts. But what a great imagery, no?
  14. Well, simply, somethings things happen. Even in non-religious, non-faith scenarios in hospitals, a body will do something totally unexpected without obvious explanation. A person expected to die gets better or something incurable just vanishes. This is not uncommon or undocumented. The reason I do not immediate jump to the divine as the reason for the anomaly is because if it was God or a spirit who did the healing, they are inconsistent AF. And that's the ultimate problem. A person may pray and against everyone's expectations a person gets better. Evidence of the divine, right? But would they
  15. The Lake of Fire. A place so far from God that his goodness and light do not shine there. Torture. Wailing. Gnashing of teeth. You live with your pain and sorrow and no goodness exists there.... wait what? No goodness exists there? But what of the good people who do not accept God? Some denominations claim that just being a "good person" is a free admission to heaven but most do not. So let's deconstruct this real quick. Why I feared hell: As a Christian, I feared hell. I feared pain and torture, sure. No one wants that. But this fear was more visceral than just the cringing
  16. No such place, my friend. And even if there were, you'd still have all of us there with you to help each other through.
  17. The years that followed the second World War were not easy. While history recounts the victories of the Allies and the era of prosperity that began for the United States, it was not immediate prosperity for all. Millions of men had returned to an economy that had learned to operate tight and lean, and a culture that had learned to ration and live without. The nation was growing but it was not equipped to absorb over a million strong, able-bodied men back into the workforce. Times were hard and starvation was again a familiar companion to those who had grown up in the pre-war depression. Commun
  18. This was introduced to us but this 87-year-old revival minister who was was always jumping and dancing on stage. Dynamic fellow. But my dad and I enjoyed the original because in the sheet music, the bass clef does a very interesting crescendo that I cannot easily describe in text but it would throw off the more timid singers around us. That was kind of our entertainment. Oh! But in term of outdated vernacular... So we were doing a Christmas special one year and I was asked to be in the choir. Well, that was an issue because I had just built our new presentation system and was stil
  19. Thanks! No offense taken. I do not claim to be the ultimate arbiter of truth. Well, anymore. I do not claim to be the ultimate arbiter of truth anymore. This rant is the product of years of unignorable irritation. It’s like K-Pop. Only, I can ignore K-Pop and pretend like it doesn’t exist. This was inescapable. Funny story, once I was running the slides on the main projector and one of the songs was “I could sing of your love forever.” As a semi-pro at live presentations I knew that to keep the words visually fresh you put no more than two repetiti
  20. Now that there are no devote Christians to report me to my church or my family, I HATE CONTEMPORARY WORSHIP SONGS!!! God, they are just awful. Just whiney mopey drudges of insipid trite! Oh, this is not my first complaint as even as a Christian I'd gently critique that "I feel many of these praise songs are somewhat repetitive and... guitar-centric." But no, let's not mince words kiddos, it's musical cancer. It's made of music but it's gone completely rogue and is filling musical works with this tumorous mass that devours anyone with skill. These songs were written by stoned out c
  21. No wait, Peleg, Eber, Shelah... you know what, it doesn't matter.
  22. I have never done a full cover to cover read through but I have read the whole thing, even the genealogies. I can tell you from memory (and yes this is from memory and not google... you'll just have to trust me on this, and no I am not looking up the spelling so there WILL be spelling errors) that Peleg is the son of Sheber is the son of Canen, the son of Arphaxed, the son of Shem, the son of Noah, the son of Lamek, the some of Methusela, the son of Enoch, the son of Jared, the son of (huge spelling guess) Mahalliel... Mahailel... Ma-Hey-Lee-El, the son of Seth, the son of Adam, the son of God
  23. I almost want to simultaneously laugh and cry the the knee-jerk thought in my mind at you coming from a Pentecostal background was “Of course it would be reasonable for you to abandon one of the CRAZY denominations.” Thanks for the hug.
  24. Thanks everyone. I do appreciate it. Here is my testimonial. It's really more for me than anything. I just needed to tell the story to get it off my chest. Thanks
  25. My Deconversion TL;DR: A husband and wife are at a party. The wife is in a room alone and her husband has gone to look for her. As the husband is about to round a corner he hears voices in the next room and so stops to listen. A third man enters the room with the wife and he asks her to leave with him so that he can show her a good time. The husband hears this but waits to see how his wife replies. She tells this stranger that she is married and not interested. The man then grabs her wrist and tugs a little trying to goad her on, telling her not to worry, it’ll be fine. The husband
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