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Myrkhoos last won the day on June 24

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About Myrkhoos

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    reading, philosophy, foreign languages
  • More About Me
    Film school graduate from Romania, wandered through monasteries, had and have some psychological problems.

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    I have no idea

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  1. That depends. Maybe you are happy and function well as a slave master. Or a pedophile So as long as your happiness does not rest on exploitation, I might want to add, just to get started :).
  2. It really depends what you mean by love and enemy. I mean God loves his enemies so much he sends them to eternal conscious torture. :))
  3. Honey on potaties seemes like a carb fest !!! :)) Not that protein rich.
  4. About that, I actually was told byba nutritionist that one way to deal with that is a eating a rich protein filled breakfast.
  5. Maybe bk, at first glance it sounds simpler - one book by one prophet about one God, no priests, no images, no sacraments. It gets complicated further on but I always feel that Islam is like simplified Christianity, in theology and practice.
  6. Also, remember, even Bart Ehrman said it took years for him to grapple with fear of Hell. You are in good company
  7. Again, do really think about some anxiety reducing options. It seems things, for you, are at a level which could warrant those.
  8. Edit. I was NOT advising him to go to an Orthodox Church and get baptised :)))
  9. I think this discussion matters because you can see differences between denominations and see their solutions to issues so you can get perspective. Also, it can calm down some fears using other tools. Like hypothetical if scenarios. I don't know exactly what anyone should do, nor do I share your certainty. Nor do I think the Bible is leather bound horse turd as you put it. Billions of people live inspired by it, and billions more inspired by an offshoot, Islam. You may think it is wrong, but it could be the basis of people's lives for so long. I do not share this mocking attitude towards religion. At least, it is a valuable insight in psychology and sociology. Otherwise it is very easy to get into other civil secular religions like some forms of nationalism, fascism, communism, wokeism, scientism. And I think one should not restrict himself only to religious or secular sources. That seems the same kind of mistake. Reading and listening only to confirm what you already want and think. I am not saying you neccesarily should read stuff, maybe it is too traumatic for the time, maybe it is exactly what you need to gain some insight. I think this is a case by case basis. I mean sure religious people have their bias, but so do secularists. I talked to authentic buddhist and daoist ordained priest/ monks and it really helped, for example.
  10. Reading about other religions reaaaally helped gain perspective by the way.
  11. No, you do not, I think. From my exp, if you told that story to a spiritual father with some knowledge from Eastern Orthodoxy he would tell that that thought from November 2010 and subsequent anxiety is eirher something biological, but more probably the devil trying to mess with you and trying to get you into despair. I had sexual thoughts with the Virgin Mary and that is literally what I was told - seems like a common thing, and they went away. That thought was not YOURS , and it was only the devil's delusion to think it was. The solution would be communiom, confession, and just ignoring those thoughts as the more attention you give them, the stronger they become. And you did not set out to lose your faith. One cannot do that, really, You started investigating your true feelings and other things about but you did not set out trying to lose your faith. And disbelief is not really the sin against the Holy spirit, it is something like altough you know God is all powerful, you start to say that you are unredeemable and stop asking for forgiveness, stop any spiritual activity whatsoever. It is stubborn opposition to the truth. Something like was said. But, the thing is, it was actually forgivable, if you changed your attitude. Like ok, I stop my despair and start practicing spirituality. The unforgivable part did not mean that repentance is impossible but if one continues in that state it is. So, again the solution would be, you, somehow, get a change of heart and confess and that is that.
  12. Well, the whole point of a lot of meditation is letting go of thoughts so that it eventually stops being unnerving. With lots of practice of course. I had others. I wanted to go Mount Athos, a famous Eastern Orthodox monastic center in Greece. I had no money and/or connections. I prayed and told a priest about it. Soon, that priest called me and told me he had found a benefator and and a reservation, I just had to go. Another time, an abott of a monastery told me that my sort of girlfriend at the time, who was pregnant, would have a miscarriage. And she did. He did say something like, well, maybe she will have a miscarriage, but out if the blue and kept talking about it. Another time, I was having trouble with my spiritual father and stumbled on a book in a local religious library about oroblens with spiritual fathers. And, the kicker, the translators name was the same as my whole name, which, altough not unique in my country , is not that common and I had never ever heard about anyone with my name before. And other things plus personal exp. . By the way, you could consider trauma therapy, there are diverse forms of it, including medication( of which I am personally very skeptical but not a denialist) and natural supplementation. Magnesium has helped me. CBD oil. I hear weed and others help provided they are legal in your home. Heck, I think even some homeopathy, Bach remedies and especially bodywork massage helped me. You could and see what helps your anxiety. Not saying they are cures, but they do help manage it and take the edge off. . As a side note the unforgivable sin was represented , to me, as a willful rejection of truth and saving grace. The example was the pharisees seeing Jesus exorcise devils and accusing him of being a devil worshipper .So you are not forgiven bk, in effect, you refuse forgiveness. Some other way it was presented was either despair, so losing hope in God's mercy to forgive and save you, or a kind of distorted hyped up faith where you were sure if God's forgiveness that you just sinned away disregarding Gods law. Both were actually a refusal of true repentance.
  13. You do realise meditation teachers from most tradition say TO IGNORE thoughts that arise, right? :)) They are just that, thoughts arising in the mind. When I meditate all sorts of things arise. Between waking and sleep and between falling asleep and being asleep our brains are in this internediate, trance lucid dream state where very intense imagery can appear while still conscious. It is a state widely accesed in hypnosis. Like the Godfather then! Yes, often. My feeling is we make most of those associations but there could be other things. But God should be obvious not play some Riddler games. I should not have not to wonder is this from God? What does it mean. I mean God spoke directly to Paul and he was a Christian hunter. Why not be obvious to everyone? One example that really struck. I was trying to get the phone number of a friend I met some time ago but forgot. After some failed attemots I was in a train heading to that friend's hometown, the reason for me wanting to get his phone number. This random girl approached me in the train saying she was bored and wanted to talk. Turns out she was also religious, but also personally knew my friend and gave me his phone number. I was awe struck and thought God and his saints answered my prayers.
  14. I, and many others know full well that Hell anxiety. An all knowing God would've known before your birth, since infinnity actually that you would go to Hell ( if that is true) or Heaven. An all powerful, knowing not to mention loving God is totally incompatibile with any sort of "free will". He made us, he made the world and its rules. Think about it. If you were a novelist, you would know exactly how your characters behave. It is like saying, well, the universe and everything in it is rigidly deterministic, but random things do happen. We are in a rigged game and the maker faults us for losing? What the...
  15. Interesting thing about co-incidences. All our lives are made of co occuring events. I brush my teeth, the nextdoor neighbour is having sex with his babysitter. An islamic imam is preaching in Baghdad about sone quran surah. A baby is born. Stars explode. We rarely think about these, on the macro or micro level. Yet, when you pray to find your keys and you find them, it is a miracle. It seems to me that WE , often, make those connections. Or get impressed by them. They deserved to be pondered on, of course, but we often out extreme focus on a verry narrow slice of events happenning, while losing the very very big picture. Like being fascinated by a grain of sand in a large beach, forgetting about the beach. There are things bigger and deepeer that deserve your attention,if you want to make an universal claim, not just some truly insignifiant details in the large scheme of things.
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