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Everything posted by Hole_In_My_Heart

  1. The Bible does not give a description of the original created being; we don't know if it had any primary or secondary sexual characteristics, or if so which ones. We don't know what gender it considered itself, or even if it had any perception of gender; if there's only one person, does it ever occur to them that certain parts of their body mean that they have a certain gender and what it is and what it means, if there isn't any other person with different body parts to compare themselves to? Questions of this nature will probably seem pointless to most binary people, but to a non-binary person, this is serious stuff! To the best of my knowledge, what I described about non--binary gender is NOT being discussed in churches of any kind, other than presumably those few that exist specifically to serve our community; that was a totally different subject, sorry for the confusion! Trump supporters weren't recently moved here from another planet, they have always been here in enormous numbers, just not represented in the media in any way. A quick review of articles shows that the size of evangelical churches (this isn't one church like the Catholic Church, this is many churches in loose affiliation) has remained steady for about 20 years, so they aren't growing, they are just becoming more vocal and given more airtime. You can't really judge anything based on what they say in the media!
  2. Most churches don't go as in-depth into the original languages as that article does, but yes, conceptually, this is something that would be taught in some charismatic churches; I don't know about the other 2 categories, I have been spared personal experience with them. I'll be interested to hear if any churches over there teach this; I have no idea how your churches are different from ours. I think what sometimes makes the way things are in America difficult for Brits to understand is that you forget that the United States is HUGE. We have 329 million people here, compared to 67 million in the UK, representing an incredibly wide range of types and intensities of religious belief. The power, though, is in the big denominational churches, such as Catholics and Baptists, and their leaders tend to be more conservative, and hog all the headlines. Ditto whoever is speaking for evangelicals as a whole, or claiming to. Nondenominational churches rarely make the news unless they are megachurches, and not often even then. What you see on the news about American Christianity is not representative of Christianity as a whole in this country. Is it the same way over there? Most people exist in the universe of the binary genders, in other words the standard 2 genders, male and female. Non-binary people are neither male nor female; they might be a mixture, or have just a tiny bit of gender, or none at all like me. The Biblical description of the original person that was created is of interest to non-binary people because if, as seems reasonably clear, the Bible describes the original person as being neither male nor female, that would provide scriptural proof of the existence of non-binary genders… Of course, the existence of intersex people, who are born with PHYSICAL genders that are neither male nor female, already proves that via science, but you know you can't get many Christians to listen to anything about science.
  3. This one might be a little too dense in Hebrew, but maybe it will help: https://margmowczko.com/human-man-woman-genesis-2/ So this patriarchal BS you see throughout most of Christianity, that man was created first and therefore is somehow superior, is not in fact backed up by the Bible... Surprise surprise. I'm curious as to why you would think that this teaching would be more of a UK thing? I don't know anything about your churches over there.
  4. Yet another way in which you are WRONG, LOL. You're wasting your time on this forum, neither I nor anyone else here cares about anything you have to say.
  5. I appreciate the nod to the non-binary, thank you! I've studied the original Hebrew, and I feel confident that it does in fact describe a person of nonspecific gender being created, and then split into 2 people each of which had a gender… Not that it matters, just as a point of interest. One of the saddest things about Christianity is that so many things that are taught are based on centuries of patriarchal opinions and contortion of the scripture, rather than what it actually says in the original languages.
  6. Is enjoying hobbies the same thing as having a purpose? Enjoying life is great, but that doesn't sound like a purpose exactly. I think a purpose has to extend beyond yourself. Something like serving your country, your community, trying to make the world a better place, doing some kind of volunteer work to help the less fortunate, that sounds like a purpose to me. Just my opinion.
  7. I've been doing really well! So much of my exhaustion and stress has just faded away. I have so much better quality and quantity of sleep, I'm getting much more done, all positive things!
  8. It's a reasonably common teaching in nondenominational charismatic churches.
  9. Here are a couple of places you can turn to to get help with mental health issues: The AMHD Crisis Line of Hawaii provides a team of trained and experienced professionals to help individuals in times of a mental health crisis. The Crisis Line of Hawaii is there to help you 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. On Oahu, call at 832-3100. On the neighbor islands, call toll-free at 1-800-753-6879. http://www.namihawaii.org/ I know that you've gotten some other good referrals in other threads as well… and at some point, you have to USE some of these phone numbers or websites and start talking to people who can assist you. I know it can be scary and hard, but there's a limit to what anonymous strangers online can do for you, especially on a forum that's not about sexual abuse or mental health. You are young, your sibling is still a minor, and you need expert help from real people in your area. The next time that the two of you are alone in the house, instead of crying together, please, please, PLEASE contact one of these organizations that can help you get out of that house!!
  10. If we're talking about history: "Virtually all modern scholars of antiquity agree that Jesus existed historically" https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jesus … and that's ALL the historical records prove!
  11. It's still a difficult world for non-binary people, so I'm glad that your sibling is getting knowledge and support at such a young age; I think that will really make a difference, but the most important support they will get will be from YOU, because you're a family member and involved in their real life. There might be free legal aid of some sort offered on your college campus, and I highly recommend checking that out and getting an idea of what you would need to do to become their legal guardian if that ended up being the best option. I know, taken care of another person, even a teenager who is nearly grown up, is a big responsibility, but I have the feeling that you are up for it! The situation that they are enduring with your dad is absolutely horrifying, especially because it could one day become tragically worse. Please do whatever it takes to get them out of that house! Thank you for the sympathy about my original testimony! It kind of sucked, but I figure, if that was the worst thing that happened to me that week, that would be a pretty easy life that many people would envy, right? It was definitely great to get some support with what I'm going through!
  12. Greetings, Blue! I'm also non-binary, although probably older than your parents, so my experience is a little bit different. You are very fortunate to have a sister that supports who you are! What little family I have is elderly people who are just not up to handling any of this gender stuff. You might find this forum beneficial (there are other forums on this site where you can discuss being asexual and aromantic): https://www.asexuality.org/en/forum/57-gender-discussion/ Someone may have already recommended this website, but they can also help you: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/ I don't think I'm being melodramatic when I say that I think it is important to your very survival that you get OUT of that household and away from your parents, especially your father! You might need to become an emancipated minor, or enter foster care for a few years... you might even be able to have your sister appointed as your guardian, since it sounds like she is a legal adult. None of these things will make for an easy life, but it will be a better life by far than what you have been enduring. Stay strong!
  13. Thank you, Josh! I'm a big Pantera fan, just FYI!
  14. Hi Dreamer, I'm non-binary and dealing with Christian fallout as well. Being non-binary actually has nothing to do with being LGBTQ, although some people of course are in both camps; gender and sexual orientation are totally different things. I'm guessing your parents will refuse to understand the difference, though. Good on you for using your sibling's preferred pronouns, and for your support of them! If you're in your second year of college, that means that you're 18 or older, right? That means that you are a legal adult, and your parents can only have as much control over you as you permit them to. I came from an abusive family as well, so let me toss some tough love at you; it's time to become an independent person. If you want to get back to the mainland and can't afford it yourself, suck it up until the end of the summer, and yes I know it's hard, so that your parents will pay to send you back… and then just cut them off. Change your phone number, and don't give them the new one. Go to your college's financial aid office and find out what is available to you. You might also be able to qualify for loans without your parents cosigning: https://studentloanhero.com/featured/how-to-get-student-loans-without-parents/ If that still doesn't provide you with enough money, you'll need to get a job. You might need to go to school only part time. You might need to withdraw for a few semesters to build up some cash reserves. Yes, that will suck, but you will be in control of your own life at last. As a bonus, you'll have a way to help your sibling get free once they reach 18, which you won't be able to do if you are still dependent on your parents. And again, yes, it sucks. It sucks that your parents are the way they are. It sucks that your choices are to deal with their abuse or to have to be independent years earlier than other people your age. The sense of freedom and control that you will gain will be worth it. The example that you're setting for your younger sibling will be worth it. The damage that you will be preventing to your psyche from not having extra years under your parents' psycho rule will be worth it. Best of luck to you!
  15. I see love and acceptance as totally different things; love is an emotion, acceptance is an intellectual decision. We'll just have to agree to disagree there. I don't think that a definition of sin is necessary, or even possible, other than "whatever God says it is," because there are always so many if's and's or but's, eg stealing in general is wrong, but then there's the hungry child example. Christians are supposed to judge; that's how they determine right from wrong, and good people from bad people. The line about judging not lest ye be judged is taken out of context. I don't know if anybody is saying that being non-binary is a sin; we should probably assume that somebody is, given how intolerant many Christians and churches are these days. What my pastor said is actually worse, really; that it doesn't exist. For something to be a sin, it has to at least exist! I refuse to not exist.
  16. Yes, that's right, the Bible shows that Jesus extended his love and caring to everyone. He did not make any exceptions of categories of people who should not be loved and cared for. Anyone who claims to be a Christian should have that exact same attitude. Not many do though. But, it is also possible to love the sinner and hate the sin, in other words to love someone without accepting them.
  17. See, here is where the Bible can be problematic! We are both totally sure of opposite and non-overlapping positions about what it says for even a basic concept. My mother always used to say that the Bible could be used to prove or disprove pretty much anything; it does often seem that way.
  18. Jesus did in fact include and serve some of the humblest and least socially desirable people in his ministry… but those people weren't proclaiming to have a different sexuality or gender, in other words not violating the basic rules of their society. The majority of his followers were low-income, but that didn't mean they were social rejects that required any special acceptance. The lepers that Jesus healed WERE undesirable, but he didn't ask any of them to join his team. Jesus talked a lot about loving and forgiving, and of course serving, but I can't think of anything he said about accepting… can you?
  19. Also respectfully, I totally see your point, but on the other hand, people who want Bibles are already Christians, and the Bibles bring them hope and comfort in a desperate situation; reduction of the misery of the lowest class of our society seems like a good thing to me.
  20. Great quote! Acceptance is such a basic thing, and yet too often amongst Christians it is in short supply, no matter how much they claim to love everybody. Like I think many Christians, my pastor's response to anything that he thinks is wrong is love the sinner, hate the sin, pray for God to change their heart… and I'm just now realizing that there's nothing about acceptance in there, which is not necessarily a part of love, although it should be. I guess in his defense, the Bible doesn't talk about acceptance much beyond stuff like accepting people who eat different things than we do… Kind of unfortunate, but I guess in those days the idea of total acceptance just didn't exist.
  21. I hear you! It looked like Myrkhoos was making some interesting points that might have been of value to explore, but then they posted again and switched to arrogant and elitist nonsense, so let's hope they keep their word and are done on this thread.
  22. For the sake of those who are still showing up there every Sunday, some of whom might also be non-binary, or know someone that is, I do hope the pastor decides to stop making an issue of things he knows nothing about, but now that I know what his opinion is, whether he expresses it or not, that puts an unsurpassable boundary between us. We all need different kinds of shorthand to talk about ourselves and each other, otherwise we'd be giving paragraphs of explanation every time, which would be impractical. You found a term that works well for you, and that helps people communicate with you; it's all good!
  23. Thank you, and well said! I greatly appreciate the support!
  24. Actually, it's NOT obvious. Saying that hermaphroditea, a word which is no longer used and does not describe most intersexuals in any case, are that way because of something that you could call dysfunction doesn't change the fact that they are human beings, they exist, and they are neither male nor female, demonstrating that there are not just 2 genders. I have limited interest in simple communication, but a great deal of interest in accurate communication, and in order to do that, the term non-binary does need to be used. I appreciate all the other information that you passed along, but that kind of philosophical stuff is totally not my thing; maybe somebody else who likes philosophy will come along and discuss that with you.
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