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  • Location
    Northeastern United States
  • Interests
    Trying to figure it all out
  • More About Me
    Mom of 3 boys, mid 50's, previously identified as Catholic

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    No. I had my "Santa isn't real" moment

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  1. Hello Myrkhoos. Sounds like we have a lot in common. I was baptized and grew up in the Byzantine Catholic rite. There are a lot of people of Eastern European decent in my home town. Growing up, I thought that the Byzantine church was too ceremonial. I would go to Roman Catholic Mass with friends and loved the guitar music and the modern songs. It was funny though, the older I got I had a greater respect and admiration for all of the Eastern rite ritual - the chanting, the incense, the formality. But I settled into the Roman Catholic faith after my children were born. You complet
  2. freedwoman, I'm new to this site - nice to meet you . Just read this thread. I can see you're in a lot of pain. I tend to ruminate about things that I can't figure out. I can't get them out of my mind. I'm getting better about not going down that path all the time. Yoga, meditation and breathing have helped a lot. And with this crazy pandemic, I've been feeling even more alone. But one thing I'll remember from the pandemic is that it gave me the push to finally join this site. I haven't had a chance to read all of your posts, but just wanted to share a book that I read.
  3. Thanks Weezer ! There might be a genetic component, lol ! My father always identified as an agnostic. Don't know if my kids ever saw him in church. My husband tolerated my religion for over 25 yrs, but I could never convince him that it was real. I was always the spiritual head of the household. But I've let the older two to their own decisions about religion and the younger one would much rather sleep in on Sunday mornings. So day to day life is actually quite fine, it's just my anxious, people-pleasing personality that is dreading having to tell people and have to experience people re
  4. SarahJane, It's funny, one of the ways the Catholic churches can tell if you attend services on a regular basis is by whether you give a weekly donation. But the churches have also modernized and you can now do regular electronic donations. We decided to do that a little while ago. We continue to do so because the local churches contribute a certain amount of money to the schools and since my son still attends Catholic school, I still contribute. In general, I feel my church is a very good steward of the money they receive from the congregation. They do a lot to serve the community, so I
  5. Thanks ficino! It's great to also connect with someone who knows about the subtleties of having been a conservative Catholic. I know that all former Christians have a lot to sort through after walking away, but each denomination has their defining elements. And as you said in your post, you and I probably have things in common and things not in common with our exit experiences. When I sensed in my being that I was most likely getting close to the point of no return, I started quietly removing myself from positions of responsibility. I had been heavily involved with a Christian ministry ca
  6. DanForsman, Thanks for all of the pearls of wisdom. The funny thing is that my son who is in Catholic School is not bothered in the least by not going to Church. At one point, I decided that we should at least go once a month so that he didn't feel like he was living a lie. When I told him that we were going to Church on a particular Sunday, he said he didn't want to go. My two younger boys are not good at sharing feelings and so I am just letting things play out as they will. As it is, our Catholic high school allows non-Catholics in the school. They just have to go along with whatever
  7. Thank you all for your comments. I will have to get busy reading posts on this site. My biggest challenge at the moment is figuring out how I fit into the life I currently have. My life had been all about being a Catholic Christian. I feel like I will have to live in both world's for a while, but I guess there are worse things I could have to endure.
  8. Hi! I just joined today and have a lot of the same interests that you mentioned. I look forward to seeing you in the forums.
  9. I’ve been wanting to post my story for over a year now. I start and then never finish. I don’t want to bore everyone with all of my details, but it’s hard to boil everything down - well, here goes My deconversion started about 3 years ago, I think. My belief system was ultra conservative Catholic. So much so that other Catholics didn’t necessarily know where I was coming from. I had what I believed to be a “born again moment” back in 2000. Prior to that, I was a run of the mill Catholic, checking my boxes of following the faith and trying to be a “good person”. The interesting twi
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