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Everything posted by par4dcourse

  1. God has an obsession with penises. What they look like, where they go, it's sad really.
  2. But does this top his "demon possessed Goodwill clothes" warning?
  3. I'm still trying to figure out where that lone shoe in the middle of the road comes from. I'll work on the universe tomorrow.
  4. We've had a lot of fun amongst ourselves trying to "out blaspheme" each other in several past threads. If there ever was concern, it disappears quickly in the light of reason.
  5. It's quite simple, 1AscinineTheist1. There's nothing ever done that requires a god. Ignorant men wrote fables to explain what they didn't understand, and ignorant xians read those fables to explain what they still don't understand.
  6. I don't understand the complainers. It's just a freakin' hour. If your body can't take an hour shift, you have bigger problems than DST.
  7. I think the purpose of life is the same as camping: leave it better than you found it.
  8. But it took him nearly a week to make the universe, so he was bound by time.
  9. I worked in an ice plant in my hi skul years. Aside from being ball clangin' cold, it was also slick, had dangerous machinery, and was very physical. Dere surs, I qwit.
  10. Conscious thought was impossible until language developed. Can't have internal dialogue without words.
  11. His holy impotence still eats it up, but Mrs. Gawd is secretly feeding him antifreeze.
  12. The problem is nobody bothered to find the bible expiration date. It clearly says "best used by 400 a.d."
  13. A democracy only insures that 51% of the population can impose their will on the other 49%.
  14. Funny that a god that could create a universe couldn't figure out iron chariots. Too high tech I guess.

    1. crazyguy123


      No, he's just allergic to iron. He's like an extremely sadistic version of Superman who becomes ill when he is too close to green Kryptonite.

  15. People get bored after 5 minutes in a drive thru. Eternity?
  16. I've also noticed they don't deal with illness and death well. Even with the whole "better place" mindset, they seem to be, pardon the phrase, deathly afraid.
  17. Just as easily as the brain produces the running commentary that is our daily lives, it can produce other internal voices. Confirmation bias instilled by the clergy make it seem spiritual, but it's all literally in your mind.
  18. Descending on Washington with empty heads and pockets wide open.
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