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Fuego last won the day on September 17

Fuego had the most liked content!

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About Fuego

  • Rank
  • Birthday 03/18/1964

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  • Gender
  • Location
    Vancouver, WA
  • Interests
    singing, writing, computer geekery, cooking, science experiments, foreign languages, photography, gemstones
  • More About Me
    Was an "on fire" Christian for 30 years, now I lean more towards a pagan-ish bent. I have been in transition since October 2007, so I doubt that I've stopped changing just yet.

Previous Fields

  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    communing with nature

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  1. Fuego

    Things Atheists Post On Facebook

    Me too. I've been holding off for the sake of being an influence on some younger fundy family members. But I so rarely see them that they will be adults and married before long. The rest of my family knows already, and these ones might suspect, but I always hoped to have some effect for reality. But I'm fairly tired of playing along. I've been out for 10 years next month.
  2. Side note, but related, I'd heard that the planes that landed on the ice sank over the years rather than were covered by fresh ice (thickening ice). The thawing and freezing there happen rather often, many times a year, and little by little the plane sank. This came up when creationists were saying that the ice cores don't show annual thaws as some claim, but far more frequent thaws, and thus can't be used to date the core layers. They used the planes as evidence of this. In this case, even though the ones pointing out the flaw in the claims are creationists, they seem to have good evidence. But perhaps I missed something since reading this back in the 90s.
  3. Fuego

    I believe in Jesus again

    Nah, at best you're darned, or maybe danged. Even Yahweh knows his "better plans" are just ignoring all the annoying prayers for healing.
  4. Salvation is simple when they are evangelizing. As soon as we leave after decades of whole-hearted worship and trust, we didn't do it just right so weren't real... And not because of evidence, because a verse. Perhaps start with why such verses are stupid rather than authoritative. Take away the "word of god" aspect by showing repeated historical falsities.
  5. Fuego

    Trip to Rome

    Just had a boss return from Italy. He said that they got on a train, put some stuff in the overhead, sat down, and a few minutes later a guy with a duffle bag sat down near them and put his bag up also. Then he got it back down with one of their backpacks and took off. He chased him down and physically towered over the guy, made him give the pack back. Just before the train took off he saw the guy outside the window smirking, duffle bag full of other bags.
  6. Fuego

    My slow liberation from the patriarchy

    Excellent! There is a saying that the unexamined life is not worth living. Finding out what you are about, what makes you resonate, is key to enjoying life. I've seen women leave husbands after years of marriage because they had married out of expectations. They said that they needed to explore who they really are inside. One lady discovered she was gay, another is straight but needed a new direction in life that her previous husband wasn't part of. The church is so big on ROLES, but that is such an antiquated view of life. We have so many options available today. So here's to you finding yourself!
  7. I thought the spore drive was interesting (especially since I've been trying to grow mycelium that I bought from... Paul Stametz, after whom the Star Trek engineer was named), but a bit silly since we don't really detect a mycelium network in space. But overall, it was an exciting new series. The movies were fun, though I thought Cumberbatch as Khan Noonien Singh was a lousy match.
  8. Fuego

    Buttered on both sides

    A recent example I saw of this was a relative who posted a meme that said "if you have to sneak around to do it, you probably shouldn't be doing it". Another relative countered, "what about the underground railroad, and those who hid Jews from the Nazis?" The first relative said that "well of course those were good, if you have a higher standard, then you will always know". I countered with "but many in the church published sermons defending slavery back in the 1800s, and yet they had what you call a higher standard. She countered with "well people will always twist scriptures to fit their goals". The point of what I had said was that the Bible never forbids slavery, and gives instructions for how to treat slaves, and to not worry about it if one dies after beating because the slave is property. But she missed that. I guess she was twisting scriptures to fit her goals... 🙄
  9. A local newspaper article made me respond https://www.columbian.com/news/2018/sep/29/evangelicals-balance-teachings-womens-worth/ "Or you could find out if the old myths are true or not, and base your life on your own choices instead of trying to make ancient tribal misogyny fit current reality. You could find out that the book is a non-historical collection of tales from a cult, not eyewitness accounts in the gospels, no supporting historical documentation for the Jews being captive in Egypt, nor for the many people that they say rose from the dead after the crucifixion of Jesus, that all of the pre-science things that sounded impressive to ancients fall flat when one understands reality (such as building a tower to reach heaven being a threat to a god when we build skyscrapers and haven't attracted any miraculous smackdowns, or Jesus ascending into the clouds "up" into heaven when we fly above clouds daily and even into space where there is no up or down). Letting go of it after 30 years of ardent "on-fire" belief has been unspeakably freeing for me."
  10. Fuego

    Trip to Rome

    Yes, please! I don't travel a lot, but I love knowing how to do it. My last trip (other than Mexico) was to Provence back in the 90s, single, never had been anywhere, had learned enough French to survive. I learned a lot about traveling, but things have changed in the past 25 years. Sit-down toilets were hard to find in France, and each one was a different design. Even in England, sit down toilets were usually for women, and guys had a wall with water trickling down. Only the train had one where I could poo. That made life difficult for me at the time because my bowels wouldn't give a lot of warning before Defcon4. One hotel I tried to go to (Ibis) had no visible entry, so I had to find another. Found a Best Western in Avignon, just in the nick of time for my gut. On the beach, after passing several cafes that I felt embarrassed to even approach, I found a McDonalds, not for food but for the public toilet (in this instance a standard American style toilet). I learned not to buy stuff I'd have to carry for miles. I learned that the green cross was a pharmacy. Doctors in France tend to be snooty about their doctor-ness. I wanted some ointment for my feet after having walked miles. No, he decided I needed a refreshing spray. I bought it, but went to another pharmacy and got ointment. I learned to dress more nicely. I was in blue jeans, white sneakers, and a red T-shirt. 'Murican! Not all train conductors know what a travel pass is. Mine had to take it up to his senior who looked at him like "Seriously?" Even after the explanation, he punched it... I learned my accent was enough to garble some words in French, so I'd have to write it out. I'm much better now. I learned that some folks are very willing to help a tourist in need. I had my map out trying to find my first hotel and a French man stopped to guide me. Courtesy is important. He felt good, I felt good.
  11. Fuego

    Those old fashioned feeling's

    You get used to it. My mind brought up Christian songs for a long time, still does occasionally, because I consumed that for 30 years. Religion is usually based on fears, and those have deep roots that take time to overcome. After my deconversion, my mind was working through stuff and gave me a very creative dream where I had to decide if I was going to be a Christian or embrace my new way. I understood what was happening and chose the new way. This is from a post here about 5 years ago: "I dreamed that I was in the house where I grew up, speaking with my brother in the kitchen. The light was off, but moonlight was streaming through the window. I looked out at the moon, and it was impossibly detailed, like a line-drawing, and rather large. I said "I've got to go outside and see this!" I stepped onto the back porch and clicked the light switch. It didn't go on. This has historically been the sign in my dreams that "THE DEVIL" was there. I knew I had been suckered into coming out there. This time he was a little boy, giggling in the dark. He began to run past me and I grabbed him, threw him to the floor, and put my foot on his chest. I could feel my body begin to freeze up like it always did in these nightmares, and I began to choke out the name of Jesus. But then I realized what I was doing and said quite clearly, "No, I don't need Jesus to do this. I need to do this." He giggled, got up and said "Careful, you're about to sin!" and ran out the back door. I said, "There is no sin." I watched him running around gleefully, and I asked him "You're me, aren't you?" He didn't answer, but in the moonlight he walked up to a bare rose bush full of thorns, faced me, and embraced it grinning. Then he ran past me, and I grabbed him and pushed him into it. He yelped. I said, "It hurts you if I do it to you, but not if you do it." And that was the end of the dream. This was an important dream from a few aspects. I had to finally face my fear of the devil, whom I no longer believe exists. I met my shadow self, who is capable of drawing me out and teaching me things about myself that I had no concept of. There is more to the imagery than I have fully understood, and I hope to meet him/me again. I know I don't need to hurt him anymore. He has a lot to teach me."
  12. Fuego

    Building Relationships

    I got involved in things that I enjoy (music, singing) and found a little group of local singers and instrumentalists. We do gigs around town and go to each others shows. I courted my wife through taking dance classes, figured out through dancing and talking that we got along quite well. I echo Disillusioned in not going into religion or ex-religion at all. Mostly people don't unless they are in the cult, or have a cultural belief (like Lutherans from Minnesota being a default religion). I had to educate myself about approaching women, since Christianity messed up my entire view of everything from money to sex. It is pretty dated now (1990s), but I read a book "How to pick up beautiful women", but he made even the most striking women just human and who typically all have some basic ideas about what they want to see in a man. It changed everything for me, going from fear to normal. I have on occasion hung out with the guys from work at a pub. But most of them are sports fans and I'm not, so nothing to talk about there. But we can all grouse about work or life. This is where people get to see the "real" you and get a feel for what you are like as a person. Otherwise things stay pretty surface.
  13. Fuego

    My Story

    Welcome! Those small cults are EVERYWHERE. I encountered a handful of them in my 30 years as a believers. Different flavors depending on the people involved, but always end up controlling lives of humans and indoctrinating in complete lies that seem to be true when the Bible is treated as authoritative and real. My own singles group at a Baptist church developed cult-like ideas, and a few of them tried to manipulate me and a woman to stop seeing each other because god didn't want it to happen. I showed them over and over again that they had no evidence of that, and that the leader himself was actually interested in her. We left and have been married for 20 years. We also had to cut off some nice people that we'd known for years because we really had nothing in common anymore, and increasingly so since we started enjoying a new life away from the church. The emotional fears you feel about your parents reactions likely feel more powerful than they need to feel. Most of us went through separations from friends and family over our deconversions. We made it. Others try and stick it out and keep some kind of ties to their believing family, but there are inevitably ongoing conflicts with the controlling aspects of the cult (generally speaking Christianity is a popular cult). Some here are married to believers still. Your life is your own, and toxic people (whoever they may be) don't deserve your time. Keep walking or running towards your new found freedom. Church messes up natural sexuality and human relationships. I had to overcome years of fear of females, learn to just be social, learn how to be more "alpha", and to see that there are a lot of females with whom I could enjoy spending time and perhaps more. The more time you can spend being involved with things you enjoy, the more you become you instead of being a drone of belief. Push yourself to do things like taking dance lessons of different kinds, maybe try singing, things that can get you with other people being humans and having fun. Sex is a natural thing, one of our most basic drives. That is why Christianity labels it as a problem and uses it to control people, it gives them a never-ending power over the believers. But as you find a life apart from the manipulation, you'll find yourself becoming more natural.
  14. Fuego

    Deadpool 2

    Agree. Plus, in the movie she didn't really have much of a character besides "Look at me be so damn deadly and out of control!" The rest of it was a hoot.
  15. Fuego

    Deadpool 2

    It is pretty funny. But they do backtrack on the first Thor where he tried to dispel the idea that they were gods and just have better tech.