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Everything posted by lunaticheathen

  1. I'd be tempted to call the cops about his suspicious behavior towards acting like a cop. That really is worrying all by itself, because people who do that are delusional cray crays. Every single other thing screams CREEPER to me, but others are right in that your cousin won't listen. Do have that talk with her daughter. ...Yeah, I'd call the police about his gun/dick waving behavior too. Say nothing about your cousin or anything else, just "he worries me and I think he might be impersonating an officer." It might get some real uniforms over there and something real done.
  2. Heh, the mention of gris-gris reminded me that most would view my Vodou practices very very "woo." I AM QUEEN WOO OF THE WOOTARDS! BOW BEFORE MY SACRED SNAKE!
  3. I know I replied to this already, but seeing the title again made me giggle. In my head, I heard "EXXTREEEEEEEEMMEE UNCTION!" and saw a priest skateboarding with a water gun full of holy water. xD Holy crap I need sleep.
  4. ^^^ That post, has lots and LOTS of good and valid points. Sex should be enjoyable, so self-determination about when, how, where, and who with that YOU want it are more important than what anyone else thinks. And being safe, of course.
  5. If it's not a troll, now that I read it again, it smacks of utter desperation to make sure everyone knows that his "right way" is also "the most awesomest way evar since pizza parties at Chuck E Cheese." And with all the smack-talk about "whorish worldly people", methinks he doth protest too much. NOOOO REALLY, IT WAS LIKE EATING CHOCOLATE CAKE STUFFED WITH COCAINE, EXCEPT JESUS SAYS IT'S OK!!! I FUCKING SWEEEAAAAARRRRR!
  6. I'm not even sure the church I went to growing up exists anymore. Most of the congregation had one foot in the grave when I was there anyway. Seriously, I think a couple of them helped build the damn church (before electricity got out to that part of the woods). I went back to the fundie school once right after deconverting, though I told no one. I was already dead to them, because I went to a "nerd boarding school" with heathen teachers that taught evilution and such blasphemies. When the *band nerds* pretended I didn't exist, I just walked out and never looked back. Now in the age of facebook, I sometimes wonder if I've been looked up, and I leave my religious views public just in case. It says "Vodou Kemetic Witch." No one has tried to contact me, bwaha.
  7. I didn't finish the article either, because he's an incredible douchenozzle. So I'm some "floozie" because I didn't wait until some uptight christian dickfart nervously waited to shove his Jesus penis in me? He can kiss the fattest part of my heathen ass. And of course, despite his claim otherwise, he WAS gloating. And over what, exactly? I suppose neither of them can really be disappointed, since they didn't have anything else to compare it to. They were probably drunk with frustrated hormones they weren't allowed to release until they appeased Angry Daddy and made sure Baby Jesus didn't cry over their touching each other's no-nos. All I know, is that letting even just a small measure of christian sexual guilt into my life nearly made me lose my damn mind. And I have no real wish to get married, since I don't feel the need to prove to the government or a church that I love someone. Like it's their fucking business. As to sex, it depends, but familiarity with someone's body does help the process, in general. And I've never heard someone relatively free of a religious agenda say that losing their virginity was the absolute best sex they ever had.
  8. In Alabama, the Southern Baptist line about Catholics was definitely ERMAGHERD PERGAN MARY WERSHIPURS! And Pentecostals were just possessed by demons and/or crazy. Methodists were "meh, whatever" but not really guaranteed salvation. Only Baptists can do that, I mean, duh.
  9. Personally, I'd be all "oooh, fun story! Now let me tell one, about how Osiris died for your crops and got a golden penis!" My myths are better.
  10. I love my boyfriend. He's going across town in the middle of the night, and promised to bring me dolmas. :D

  11. I kind of love Raelians. Yeah, it's pretty fuckin' out there, aliens bein' our scientist cloner-parents, but they're very sex-positive and love body glitter. What's not to like there?
  12. Of course, even the "regular" stories had some weird shit. Like Isis making Osiris his own golden penis after his got lost because he was cut up, and she knocked herself up with said dead brother/husband and golden dong. Why? SHE'S THA BOSS OF MAGIC. And when a goddess goes rampaging, the answer is beer. But that makes more sense than anything in the bible. I'm still amused by the myth of Thoth and Khonsu, how Thoth played a game of senet to put 5 more not-days on the year so Nut could have her divine quintuplets. WEIRD RELEEJUN, I HAZ IT!
  13. Well, I don't know about "woo", and this story is really not meant to be theology or even "real" (even back in ancient times, this was purely an Egyptian "lolgods" story), but here ya go. A condensed bit of the Contendings of Horus and Set retold. I laugh until I cry over this, btw. http://bettermyths.c...on-his-enemies/ Suddenly....RANCH DRESSING!
  14. I loved finding Chick tracts at random places around town (very common in AL). It was like a little surprise humor reading. And I'd never put them back, because they're just too fucking hilarious, and I liked throwing a monkey wrench into their plan. They're just SO STUPID. And finding one with the LDS church site written on it? I thought Chick hated Mormons. Not as much as Catholics, but, ya know.
  15. Sorry you're in Alabama. I grew up there, and for a thinking person, there is no greater antidote to christianity than the majority of people in Alerbummer. And no, they haven't read the Constitution. They likely haven't even read the bible. Because they KNOW Jeebus votes republican, shoots teh geys with his huntin' rifle while chugging beer and watching NASCAR. And has a wicked mullet.
  16. I also wish the gender war would end, and have no wish to perpetuate it. I have met females that also urge me to submit my body to the state/men, and they get just as big of a "fuck you very much" from me. Basically, with abortion, if the tissue is not in YOUR uterus, and/or you're not the (honest) doctor in front of said woman, IT'S NONE OF YOUR FUCKING SAY. I won't listen to you. Your opinion means less than shit. At least shit makes plants grow. So, yes, my reaction to old men not in the medical field going on about "fucking women" having concern over their own say in their bodies is basically "SHUT UP AND DIE ALREADY!" I can't see how what they say matters. Maybe that's callus, but I don't get in their faces about the dangers of viagra and how their insurance shouldn't cover it, they should just live without boners. And it's not like getting a boner is even a FRACTION of the life-changer that a PREGNANCY is. Face it, men simply don't have a biological equal to pregnancy, and some idiots (of either sex) think it's fair to regulate it? Bitches, please.
  17. Because wanting to have rule over my own body is a leftist religion? Kiss my ass Legion. I will never back down from misogynism, and if that makes me "not compassionate", fucking bite me.
  18. I have a female friend who really likes the Goblin King... it's because of his "Magic Pants" as she likes to say. They are very magical pants. Dance! Dance, magic pants! Funny when this guy inspires more nice feelings than Jeebus.
  19. Some people like preaching, some don't. I don't like preaching from anyone, but that's what ignore is for.
  20. Did anyone on this thread say get rid of all men? NO. I only heard STOP PRETENDING YOU RULE OUR BODIES AND MINDS. If that's not you, I'm not speaking to you. If it is, you're fucked. Are you fucked?
  21. Hahahaha, it gets better- Hephaestus (think the guy on FB had a spelling whoopsie), is a Greek god of fire, particularly for blacksmiths, but also for other craftsmen: http://www.pantheon....hephaestus.html Because that bitch got BURNED! See wut I did thar? xD
  22. Whether they actually doubt or not, this just smacks of that "sneaky in" kind of phrase. "I was hurt by people in church too." "I was once a neopagan JUST LIKE YOU." My immediate reaction is "liar." I've never had one say something like that and NOT try to full-on convert me. They can take their "doubts" and "past" and shove it.
  23. Good work getting out of the Southern Baptist cult! YAY! (I've been there, I'd never ever go back, BLARG, I'm a "filthy idol-worshipper" anyway ) I couldn't keep my apostasy to myself, or my move into pagan religions. Everyone knows, and if they don't like it, they can eat a bag of dicks. But that's me, and not everyone is comfortable with that kind of bluntness. I love living my life openly and not pretending to be something I'm not. I find my peace that way, knowing who I am and loving it, no matter what anyone else thinks. Others would rather avoid conflict with the people around them, but when I fake something, I cause ten times the internal conflict in myself. Fuck that noise. Whatever you decide is best for you, good luck with it, and best of luck planning your wedding!
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