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ilovemybrain last won the day on September 30 2010

ilovemybrain had the most liked content!

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About ilovemybrain

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    Free! Thinker!

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    Age 40ish and holding...I'm recovering from religion and divorce, starting a new phase of life with a good man whom I love with all my heart, making my life the way I want it to be, and finding happiness again. Deconversion was not painless, and some of the fallout continues to this day, but it is SO worth it to live authentically and freely.

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  • Still have any Gods? If so, who or what?
    none for me, thanks, I've had enough

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10,255 profile views
  1. And I also remember you @Overcame Faith! Glad to hear from you! Thank you for the friendship and encouragement when I needed it! I and @Eugene39 are happy as heck and so thankful for this site. 3 of my 4 kids are grown and 1 has thought his way out of fundamentalism, so that makes me happy too. We happened upon another “Ex-c” (from this site) in our town who is semi-famous now for an ex-c book she wrote and we were privileged to celebrate our wedding at her beautiful home, and are very thankful to know her. My kids love my husband and love seeing us happy. We have had much fallout
  2. *hugs back* - yeah it's hard to be around people who misunderstand us and see us as a disappointment, so the best answer right now is distance. Sorry you have to deal with that too.
  3. Actually, that is part of our thoughts, too. We are open to that possibility as we get older, if it seems advantageous and pretty clear to us that the relationship will last til the end.
  4. Thank you :-) No, that was my point - although I didn't word it very well. Even ex-C's here who don't even know us but have been through similar experiences, as well as our personal friends who do know us, all seem to see us more clearly than our own parents do, who should know us but don't bother to look past their own preconceived ideas about apostates or ask us how WE feel about anything.
  5. Yeah, our thinking about marriage is this: we are all for a deep, serious commitment and that is what we have, but in our marriages, our spouses felt that commitment meant just 'not divorcing.' They felt we were stuck with them, so they didn't have to do anything to make the marriage work. We both want to know each other is there because they want to be, not because they have to be. And we don't want to be each other's legal "possession" either. I realize others feel differently about marriage and there are some good reasons to consider it, but that's how we see it. And thanks again for t
  6. I hear ya. I'm just really sad tonight about how these relationships we treasured are based on their own mental picture of who they think we are or who they want us to be. So when we admit what we really think, we can't really connect anymore. The way fundy Christianity divides people is just...sad. Hopefully though, you will be able to at least keep things on somewhat of an even keel and not have a major break with them. And thanks for sharing my good cheer about finding someone special
  7. Thanks They're not actually in-laws since we don't plan to officially legally marry, and I haven't met them yet, but it is bound to happen sometime. So much fun to look forward to. <sigh>
  8. I just have to chime in here and say I totally agree with those who have urged you to set boundaries. Because I love my parents and wanted them to hear what I was thinking and feeling, I did sit down and talk with them ONCE. It didn't go well, but I made it clear I was not open to any further debate. There is nothing they could tell me that I haven't heard before. And I knew nothing I said would change their minds. So I just didn't agree to talk to anyone about it other than my then husband. I decided that other than the one talk with parents, (and a brief explanation to my brother) I just did
  9. Xians would love to drag us back into their prison again, and it makes it hard to keep ties with them when they shit all over our happiness every chance they get.

  10. I'll try to encapsulate some background here, for some of you who don't know my story. I left xianity about 5 years ago, after years of questioning, and realized one day I truly no longer believe. I was married to a fundy and had (still have) 4 children. Fundy parents and husband were shocked and horrified at my unbelief. After a couple years of trying to make my marriage work, I finally divorced. I wanted to move on in life and find love someday and be in a relationship where I'm not looked down on as a colossal disappointment for using my mind and coming to different conclusions. I also want
  11. This weekend I learned: strip Farkle is not a good risk. You gotta dress in lots of layers for that shit. SOMEONE was enjoying the hell out of my bad luck though.

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. ilovemybrain
    3. Eugene39


      Your bad luck was somebody's good luck. ;)

    4. ilovemybrain


      Ohh you just wait. I'll find a game you suck at, and then it'll be MY good luck! Lol

  12. I kissed an ex-C and I liked it. (Pretty sure he did too). :-)

  13. Gettin' all twitterpated...

  14. Just popping in to say hello :-) I'm not here very often these days but I always remember how much this group has meant to me, especially when I thought I was the only one...

    1. Show previous comments  2 more
    2. ilovemybrain


      I have the highest admiration for those who think and question and stay true to themselves.

    3. pratt


      well,people come and go n pops in once a while, good to hear u r ok

    4. TrueFreedom
  15. Oh...you're probably talking about lifespan. I thought you were implying homo sapiens died out. My bad...carry on.
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