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Showing results for tags 'it does get better'.
It's been three and a half months since I first posted my extimony here, my very first post on the forum, and I finally took a look at it again. (Found here: http://www.ex-christian.net/topic/48703-its-taken-a-while-to-get-the-courage-to-even-join-this-site/page__fromsearch__1 ) I guess I just wanted to give an update, particularly for any lurkers out there who are struggling. I hope that this may serve as some encouragement to someone to come join us here. I'd certainly like to meet you, and I know many others on the forum would love to meet you, too. We're not a perfect bunch, but if anyone out there is feeling isolated and fearful of joining the forum, I sincerely hope that you will accept an invite to introduce yourself and allow us to give you some support in your deconversion journey. Believe me, we know how hard it is. I, too, was very intimidated the first time I posted on the forum. It took a long time to get the nerve up to actually join up. Everyone seemed so intelligent- I felt so stupid by comparison. I was also hurting, badly, at the time. I was angry and bitter, though I did not quite realise it back then. I also felt a great deal of despair- I didn't believe it would ever be possible to shake off the brainwashing I had been through. I felt as though I was trapped between the brainwashed thought-process of christianity and an emerging thought process of my own. But it does get better. While we all shake off christianity at our own pace, life is better on the other side. I have become an atheist, and nothing has ever made me feel happier or more free. And this forum had a lot to do with that new-found freedom. I have learned so much from the other members here and their discussions. I'm a bit of a lurker myself in the science threads- it's pretty embarrassing to admit that a few months ago, I still believed in the whole Noah and the Ark story, creationism, and (just between you and me), I'm still getting my head around what actually happened to the dinosaurs. But that's what Ex-C is for- learning, support, and encouragement. I truly am a new person now. I have found a confidence I never knew I was capable of having, and the brainwashing is losing its impact and hold over me every day. I have immersed myself in atheist videos and resources- they really are the best anti-dote to christian brainwashing, and have helped me immensely to increase my ability to think critically, logically, rationally, and objectively. The question of the existence of any god or goddess is not something I worry about anymore. I can't really see the point of worrying about something like that. The chances of me ever being able to answer that question would have to be statistically minute to begin with, and I just figure that if there is a god/goddess, then I'll probably find out at the same time as everyone else, or when I die. So I focus instead on just living and learning. This is a huge change for me, considering how neurotic I used to be, utterly obsessed with getting to the bottom of everything. In life, some questions probably won't be answered. And that's okay with me. It's so ironic. I left christianity and found peace and happiness. This was all written with any lurkers out there in mind. Atheism works for me, but it may not for you. And that's okay- this is your journey. I just wanted to let you know that it does get better. And I hope that maybe you'll drop by and say hi sometime