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Goodbye Jesus

Looking For Comfort....


Angel

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Okay, humor is probably way inappropriate, but. . .

 

Then, I was talking to someone in hospice about funeral services if they are needed for the baby. I told her that I did not want god mentioned not even once. She said, "Well, some scriptures can be very comforting to someone that is grieving." Not to me! Comfort my asshole!

 

I know it was a typo, but I can't get the picture out of my head of you screaming at a lady, demanding that she "Comfort your asshole." :mellow:

 

(sorry)

 

The queen of typos, that'd be me... lol I am sure you all know what I mean...lol

 

I'm so sorry you have to go through this right now. It must be so difficult, all of it, even just the unknown outcome of your babies health. In a very difficult time in my life when it was found that my baby had some major health problems, I was blown away by what some other Christians said to me. They would ask how I was doing and when I told them, they basically quoted scripture on what my attitude should be and walked away. It was so not what I needed then. I needed someone to give me a hug, or just look me in the eye and validate my pain at that moment.

 

Once you become a mother, you have a new vulnerability, I think. It can be really scary.

 

If I knew where you lived I'd send you a journal. Maybe what helped me the most was writing all my experiences/emotions down. Now I look back and am amazed at the ways in which that pain changed my life for better and worse.

 

I won't be praying for you, but will be thinking of you.

 

Thank you for all the kind words...ALL of you.

It amazes me how the christian world is and that I was a part of it at one time, saying the same things that totally irritate me now. When you are hurting, like you said, a hug helps, or someone just being there as a friend and nothing more. The very last thing you need is preached at or an explanation of how god is working in the situation. They do not really see that they are actually making excuses up for his short comings. That is all it really is, to me. It is much easier for me to believe that things just happen, a part of life that we all face some time or another. It is nice to not have to worry about "sticking up" for a god that is suppose to be able to do anything and "chooses" to do nothing.

 

Again, thank you all. I will keep you all posted as to what is going on.

 

PS, thanks for the link exbeliever.

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Just read your post Angel. As a mother, I can only imagine what your feeling. Please keep us posted on the baby's progress.

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Reading this thread made me want to shed tears.

 

I am so sorry Angel. :( And the fact that the christians in your life have given you a bunch of shitty catchphrases and cold comfort doesn't help matters.

 

Death hurts like hell, If I'm being blunt. It will hurt but you will survive. Take care of yourself Angel.

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((Angel))

My heart goes out to you. I lost my firstborn, who was very much wanted as well. The God Talk didn't help me either. I finally found comfort months after, but that was personal for me.

 

Ywo things that might help should the child not live. There is a Yahoogroup, "stillbornandstillloved" which is usually pretty religion neutral that can be a good resource. There is also a book called "empty Cradle, Broken Heart" which helped me a lot.

 

I wish you luck!

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